Miscellaneous: Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've...

By LondonKitsch - 26/06/2009 16:51 - United States

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 833

You deserved it 29 770

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/12/2010 13:05 - United States

Today, for the first time, a good looking guy was in my yoga class. Today also marked the first time I farted during yoga class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 812

You deserved it 5 607

Dancing queen

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 16:44 - Switzerland

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 104

You deserved it 6 401

By belle_arina - 08/10/2009 05:05 - United States

Today, we were doing stretches in dance class where you are on your hands and doing the splits in the air while your partner helps hold you and stretch your legs further. Right as I lift my left leg up, I farted hugely right in my partner's face. I couldn't make eye contact for the rest of class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 423

You deserved it 8 519

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 250

You deserved it 14 868

Core

By Anonymous - 18/03/2023 16:00

Today, I went to the gym and accidentally farted during yoga class. Everyone looked at me and the instructor said, "Let's all take a moment to appreciate the power of core strength." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 164

By mooned - 03/02/2018 01:30

Today, I went to a yoga class for the first time in a few years. When I went to change afterwards, I realized I'd split my pants at some point during the class. I think I understand why the girls behind me were laughing so hard now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 094

You deserved it 392

Class act

By raspberrysachere - 03/06/2019 16:00

Today, I was in yoga class. We were in downward-facing dog pose, and the male instructor stood behind me and gave me an assist/adjustment by pulling upward on my hips. As I left the class, I realized that was the most intimate touch I've ever received from a man. I'm a 25-year-old straight woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 817

You deserved it 249

By Craptastic - 15/09/2018 15:00

Today, at physical therapy, I felt that all-too-familiar gurgle in my gut, but I thought it would a light, silent fart. I squatted for an exercise and shit my pants in front of the cute, single, male physical therapist. He definitely noticed. I still had 30 minutes left in the session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 815

You deserved it 659

By Anonymous - 27/10/2009 10:28 - United Kingdom

Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for 'anti-social behavior'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 620

You deserved it 2 941

By john - 28/01/2009 23:02 - United States

Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for 2 years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 841

You deserved it 5 155

Mandy_fml 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:17

Haha, that's hilarious! Sucks to be you.

nightswimmer 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:18

oooh that sucks, you shoulda said to him "it was you"

Comments

shirvon100 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 2:38

that sent the same chill down my spine as the one when i met a clown dressed exactly like the one from the movie "It".

KRD727 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 2:41

Maybe he gagged because you did the splits when he was going in for a handshake.

crazy_cat_lady24 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 2:44

You can't smell a queef. It's just trapped air.

brasileirinha 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 2:56

IM LAUGHING SO HARD.

stfunubcake 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 3:02

ewww did you use your vibrator before working out?

katelynmarie 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 3:18

Lol, it happens.

nixxx90 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 3:38

hahaha shaaame

boundforglorywt 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 3:48

awesome haha definitly funny

chimmy 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 3:53

YDI. He came over to GREET you, and you tried to show off/seduce by putting your leg over your head. I have no pity.

FailBabee 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 4:28

Agreed with 102. xD and queefs aren't THAT bad. It happens with me and my bf sometimes and I just bust up laughing, as does he.

HeyThereGorgeous 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 4:13

That's just ... Funny! And pretty gross

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The Top

Today, I put my sexiest lingerie on, lit candles, put some sensual music on, and got my bed ready to surprise my boyfriend when he came home. I positioned myself in the sexiest pose possible. He came home and didn't come in my room for twenty minutes because of a football game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 148

You deserved it 6 979

Today, my girlfriend went on a date with her mechanic. She said it was to get discounts when she goes in for maintenance. Not only does she not see a problem with it, but she's probably getting discounts on other services too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 740

You deserved it 5 265

The Top

Today, I'm a car salesman. I got told to cold call a list of previous customers, but I recognised the names as I phoned them all last week; I told the manager this. He slammed his fist on my desk and told me to stop lying and do as I was told. I got told to "fuck off" 27 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 663

You deserved it 1 372

Today, I know my life is awesome when my partner and I have to plan watching movies and having sex around his drinking schedule. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 249

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 586

You deserved it 12 266

Today, to save money, I tried following a YouTube tutorial to trim my beard myself. Halfway through, the clippers slipped, and now I have a huge chunk missing in the middle of my chin. I tried to even it out, but it just got worse. Now I look like I lost a fight with a Flymo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 217

You deserved it 342

Today, I'm studying abroad in Mexico and someone asked me what it's like to be from Minnesota. I responded in Spanish, in front of thirty people, what I thought translated to, "If you get cold, you can just put on a jacket." Apparently, what I thought meant "jacket" actually meant "masturbate". FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 382

You deserved it 5 410

Today, at 5:30 on a Sunday, I noticed my tire had a bubble in it. I found a tire shop 15 minutes away that would be closing at 6pm and made it there in time, but the shop had closed early. I left to try and make it to the next one and had a blow out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 580

You deserved it 307

Same thing different taste

Dancing queen

Core

Class act

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