no. any hints?

lol exactly.

58- I hope you are joking, but I have a feeling you're not. It sucks because hard working people get their tax dollars stolen from them to support a child that the father should be supporting. Yes, men don't have the choice of whether a child is born or not, but they should think about that before they decide to have sex. Little boys who can't man up and take care of their children need to have their dicks cut off. And women who can't keep their legs closed, and pop out a million kids, need to have their legs sewn shut. Some of them steal our hard earned money too.

no, i'm not joking. i don't think the state should pay people for their kids though. pregnancy is a curable condition. if you refuse treatment, then you deserve whatever you get.

you sound like a really classy girl.. how many babies have you killed?

Abortion should not be used as a method of birth control. I'm not anti-abortion, but people need not to be ridiculous about this.

Dynky, abortion is a choice of both partners. In a serious relationship, the two partners will think and discuss the options and (hopefully) find the ultimate solution (to keep, to abort, to adopt) together. It is really immature from you to say that you're immediatly gone if your girlfriend doesn't want to abort. Extremely immature and disrespectful. My guess is that you've never been in a situation like that, and that you will react different if it really happens. To keep, abort or adopt your (future) child is a serious matter, especially for the woman. And if you don't want to be a father, well, leave them, but pay the alimentation. Don't disappear.

Pregnancy is not a disease. It simply requires maturity for the man and the woman. If you don't want kids, use a damn condom or birth control pills. Preferably both (what ever happened to Norplant?) If you get pregnant against the odds, I understand using abortion as a last resort, but please don't be so flip about it.

of course abortion shouldn't be plan A. prevention is better than cure after all. but if you do end up pregnant and choose not to have an abortion, then don't whinge about it or try to make anyone else pay for the child that YOU decided to go ahead and have.

Hmm, I understand you. But still, it's disrespectful and mean. Than you let your partner stand alone, in a time she really needs help and (financial) support. If you would let her pay for everything, for the consequence of something that's called 'an act of love', you're not only disrespectful and mean, but you also don't give a shit about her. And than you shouldn't have had sex with her from the start. My boyfriends father decided one day that he was tired to be husband/father. He disappeared without paying one cent. I know it's a different case, but hey, why should the father of my boyfriend pay alimentation for something he's tired? Not his fault that his wife decided to stay with the child, is it?

I don't think it's morally right, but I see where dynky's coming from. Ideally, Dj's scenario would always be true, with both partners deciding together what to do about an unexpected pregnancy. When they don't, though, there is a legal bias against men, at least here in the US. If he doesn't want to be a parent and she does, he's screwed, often even if he gives up parental rights. Conversely, if he wants to raise the child but she doesn't want to carry it, he's also screwed. The truth is, though, that men and women *can't* have equal rights in this matter. You can't give men more rights without taking away a woman's consent over her body. That's just as wrong. As for child support, sure, you can say neither he nor the state should pay for these unexpected kids, but what happens when the woman can't and they're all starving or homeless? "Sorry kid. Mommy shouldn't have had you, so now you're SOL"? As I see it, it almost has to be the way it is. Complications from pregnancy, childbirth, and abortion can all kill or permanently injure a woman's body, but they have varying degrees of risk. She has to be the one make that decision. The state can't possibly pay all necessary child support. Putting that responsibility on the fathers seems to be the least of the evils. While unfair in some situations, at least it isn't lifelong or potentially fatal. This is why if I was a man, I'd insist that my partner and I decide in advance what to do if it happens. If we can't agree, we don't have sex, or use triple protection. And I'd definitely be snipped by now.

^ Holy shit, sorry 'bout the length. O.o I wrote it in Notes and it didn't look that long.

adoption!!!!!

If you don't use protection you deserve every child support coming your way. On the other hand people who did use protection but it failed due to mishandling should have a pass and have a chance to give away their parental rights and have nothing to do with the child.