Intimacy: Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life....

By Mom - 11/06/2011 17:25 - United States

Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 500

You deserved it 5 596

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Same thing different taste

Love knows no boundaries

By Anonymous - 08/07/2020 14:01

Today, I found out my son's girlfriend is actually a webcam porn star he pays for private sessions. He’s somehow convinced himself they have a real relationship, and is spending thousands of pounds every week, on his credit card I may add. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 405

You deserved it 268

By T.C - 23/01/2010 12:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my happily married father has been hiring escorts on-line for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 192

You deserved it 2 521

By parent - 08/03/2018 01:30

Today, I found out that my son has been telling me he's gay so we would allow the "female friend" who is actually his girlfriend to stay over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 224

You deserved it 2 830

What are you doing here?

By sadmom - 18/03/2020 05:05

Today, I found out the man I have been dating is my son’s principal. I found out by having to pick my suspended son up from school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 679

You deserved it 429

By Pumpkin - 18/07/2009 02:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 205

You deserved it 102 950

By FMLMom - 08/08/2012 08:02 - United States - Chula Vista

Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 856

You deserved it 4 638

Sneaky

By Suckered - 04/12/2015 21:47 - United States - Hialeah

Today, I found out my son was never accepted into the local university two years ago. He actually went out and got a job, and only lied about it so he could keep living in my house rent-free. The conniving bastard makes more than I do at my minimum-wage job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 716

You deserved it 4 734

By Jilly - 08/08/2011 06:45 - Australia

Today, I found out that my son had sold his house key to one of his friends for half a packet of gum. Now there is someone out there who I have never met with full access to my house. My son is 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 102

You deserved it 5 313

By Anonymous - 07/10/2009 23:12 - United States

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 315

You deserved it 16 791

Hustlers

By Anonymous - 25/08/2022 02:00

Today, I found out that my 14-year-old son spent hundreds of dollars on what appears to be a misogynist multi-level marketing hustlers' website. How did he pay for this horseshit, and how did I found out? My PayPal account sent me emails, telling me that several purchases had been made, but too late for me stop them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 976

You deserved it 205

docscientist 9

Sunday 12 June 2011 0:29

He should've called himself "Peter Porker."

Nikki_ASW 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 0:25

Isn't that spiderman....?

Comments

ribbyc80 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 13:29

Peter Parker, parks his Peter, where Parker's Peter needs to be parked!!!!

mrjude 3

Sunday 12 June 2011 14:52

That's a stupid name... Peter Porker would be better. Or even Peter Porkher.

tashhshere 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 15:40

haha true

sephoraprincess 7

Sunday 12 June 2011 17:19

more like skippy?

lauraaaaaa_fml 7

Sunday 12 June 2011 17:49

At least he's smart enough to get people to pay him for sex, instead of the other way around...

jordanian23 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 18:37

what's moonlighting

LilysTillie 7

Sunday 12 June 2011 18:46

how'd you find out? Because that would be really awkward if it was because you "ordered" a prostitute & he showed up!

PeterParker4sale 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 19:04

Wow, looks like me and my mom are due for an awkward conversation I guess FML.

jingersnap721 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 19:34

you accidentally hired him didn't you?

post12 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 19:44

spider-*****, spider-*****. Does what ever a spider-***** does. Can he swing from a web? No he can't; your son's a *****!

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 275

You deserved it 3 577

Today, after being so jaded by failed relationships, I'd given a guy who slid into my Facebook Messenger a chance. We'd entered the talking stage, only to be told four months later that he’s found a girlfriend, and no longer wants to continue this interaction and blocked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 634

You deserved it 277

The Top

Today, I was walking my dogs when a woman at a bus stop quite rudely exclaimed, "Keep those mutts away from my kid". I replied just as rudely that I wouldn't want them anywhere near her dirty sprog. It was then we both realised she was a customer that I regularly talk to at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 427

You deserved it 8 037

Today, I found out the high school I have been doing at home for the past 3 years isn't accredited and doesn't count for anything. I'm 18 and starting high school as a freshman next year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 483

You deserved it 19 629

Today, after a hard day's work and emotional argument with my best friend, I sent my boyfriend a text telling him how much I loved him and cherished him in the hopes he would cheer me up with a romantic reply. He said "Sorry, I've only got 8 texts left." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 328

You deserved it 6 782

Today, while walking barefoot through my house, I saw something shine on the floor across the hallway. Curious as to what it was, I rubbed my foot across the carpet to feel it. It wasn't until it was deeply lodged in my foot did I realize it was an open safety pin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 676

You deserved it 40 873

Today, my boyfriend wanted to get into an open relationship. He has no romantic feelings for me anymore, but he didn't want to separate from my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 153

You deserved it 1 379

Today, I went to visit my grandmother for what will most likely be the final time. It has been 6 days since she has been allowed to eat or drink, and the doctors are sedating her. I walked in and gave her a hug. Her response? "I don't know who you are." Thank you late stage dementia for that final memory. FML

I agree, your life sucks 956

You deserved it 138