Love: Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose...

By anonamous - 17/07/2009 16:59 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 231

You deserved it 96 729

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Same thing different taste

By benjavel71 - 10/01/2017 11:13 - United States - Prairie Grove

Today, I thought about going to visit an old girlfriend of mine with hopes of getting a little head. Unfortunately, I didn't know it would be head lice I'd get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 804

You deserved it 9 118

By caliibbyy - 29/11/2010 05:03

Today, I found out my best friend has a massive head lice infestation. It wasn't until after I'd used her hairbrush to brush my hair that I figured it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 090

You deserved it 7 251

By hairy - 30/09/2013 21:59 - United Kingdom - Guildford

Today, I discovered that I have caught head lice from my son. Unfortunately, they are living in my chest hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 401

You deserved it 3 839

Hair issues

By Blake - 26/08/2022 00:00

Today, my wife is angry with me because after she'd convinced me to grow out my hair, it exposed my receding hairline. I shaved my head to the same appearance as when she married me, so I could feel more comfortable with my own body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 823

You deserved it 125

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 01:08

Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted to take a break. At least she gave me a parting gift. Lice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 235

You deserved it 963

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 20:08 - United States - Clarksville

Today, after finally spending the night with my longtime crush, it's as if I can still feel her fingers caressing my hair. But wait, no, that's just the head lice she gave me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 346

You deserved it 3 006

Natty dread

By why???? - 05/09/2022 08:00

Today, I’ve been growing dreads for two years after I lost my hair to chemo. After visiting my boyfriend’s family, we all contracted lice from the kids. Even though I did the shampoo and treatment, my locks are too coiled to effectively comb out all the nits. I have to shave my head again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 463

You deserved it 408

By violetbcracecar - 14/12/2016 03:48 - United States - Suisun City

Today, for the first time in my life, I have lice. The dog we rescued infested our house. No amount of showering has made me feel clean, and my bald husband just doesn't understand why I'm so bothered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 598

You deserved it 955

By ItchItchBaby - 09/09/2017 13:00

Today, 2 hours before a 13-hour flight, I found out I had head lice. I'm a 24-year-old woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 112

You deserved it 474

By Baldy - 03/04/2011 09:16 - New Zealand

Today, my wife told me that she was leaving me for someone with more hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 606

You deserved it 4 765

pittsports87 0

Friday 17 July 2009 23:01

YDI for being a hippy

Greendarthpotato 0

Friday 17 July 2009 23:02

That is gross.

Comments

anubisismylife 9

Monday 6 May 2013 11:06

Smart woman.

teentee401 36

Wednesday 15 May 2013 2:54

When I first read this I saw "Today, I found out my wife gave me head on purpose."

Steffi 26

Sunday 23 June 2013 19:56

You didn't have to cut it.

Pebbles622 16

Saturday 20 July 2013 22:04

seriously??

DeadPixel4 29

Tuesday 1 April 2014 18:09

Ew, a ponytail? On a guy?

LAuroraD 17

Wednesday 9 April 2014 5:21

I don't blame her ponytails should stay in the 90's

battleroyalefan6 16

Thursday 17 April 2014 5:52

Can't blame her

WhackTheJackal 22

Thursday 16 October 2014 15:07

I cannot YDI any harder.

KayyKaylyn 14

Saturday 22 November 2014 18:30

Your wife is smart

msdtreadwell 15

Monday 29 December 2014 11:36

Yuck man

Keywords

Awkward Friends Love Haircut Miscellaneous Cute Relatable Work Cars You're fired Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Poopoo peepee Management Frustration Capitalism Coworkers Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Technology Mental health

The Top

Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 1 842

Today, my ex-girlfriend from several years ago texted me. We were having a pleasant conversation until she asked me to give advice. Apparently, her current boyfriend is incapable of talking dirty, fingering, and other sexual aspects. She asked me to give him advice and pointers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 639

You deserved it 1 196

The Top

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the mouth while eating a Go-Gurt. I was eating it because I'd just had my wisdom teeth removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 671

You deserved it 5 373

Today, I was so happy to be leaving the hospital after breaking my arm the night before. Just as I walked out of the doors, a huge ambulance team was running in at the same time, and knocked me down full force. I now have a broken ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 296

You deserved it 2 540

Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 394

You deserved it 25 976

Today, we had to sit our friend down and explain that President Zelensky is not a Mossad agent/US puppet who forced Putin to invade Ukraine. He responded by talking about Hunter Biden for an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 260

Today, my wife, who has been unemployed for over two years, had a $415k job offer rescinded, all because the hiring manager thinks she might be a Karen (Yes, she is). My job contract ended last month, so we have no income. FML

I agree, your life sucks 742

You deserved it 201

Today, my boyfriend wrecked our car. Now I can't get to work in order to make the money we need to buy a new one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 599

You deserved it 4 663

Same thing different taste

Hair issues

Natty dread

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