Miscellaneous: Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted...

By Sally - 22/08/2011 00:17 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 899

You deserved it 69 423

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Same thing different taste

Lava lamp

By Kathleen Verhaegen - 30/04/2020 20:00

Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 389

You deserved it 296

Trumped

By Anonymous - 23/10/2019 18:00

Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 1 731

By waytootan - 22/08/2011 20:34 - United States

Today, I came in to work looking very tan. I took Friday off to go to a friend's funeral, which was outdoors, and I tan very easily. Now my boss and everyone else thinks I lied about my friend's death to get off work on a Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 019

You deserved it 3 130

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 19:06 - Denmark

Today, I decided to try a self-tanning lotion my friend had recommended. I put it on, and decided to take a nap. I woke up later and checked myself in the mirror, expecting to see a new, more tanned version of myself. I didn't. I'm now orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 586

You deserved it 39 978

By fishwizard - 02/06/2017 20:00

Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 735

You deserved it 3 971

By blotchy-girl - 15/07/2009 04:00 - New Zealand

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 064

You deserved it 6 737

By tan disaster - 27/02/2009 23:09 - United States

Today, I went to get my spray tan before my semi-formal. After I applied lotion to the bottom of my feet as instructed, I went in the booth and began to start the tanning session. I lost my balance and fell right as the machine began to spray. I look like a spotted cheetah. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 522

You deserved it 39 343

By thatsucks4u - 14/08/2010 00:56 - United States

Today, I went to a tanning salon. I guess nobody mentioned that you have to lift your fat rolls or you'll end up with weird stripes where the spray never reached. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 090

You deserved it 51 160

Lookin' good

By racoonface - 19/04/2009 15:17 - United States

Today, it was lovely outside so I decided to tan outside. I burn pretty easily, so I put on sunscreen. I fell asleep on my side, so when I woke up, I had a massive burn on only one side of my body, with sunglass lines. Tomorrow, I have a job interview. I'm going to go in looking like a racoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 680

You deserved it 54 755

New, from L'Oréal!

By oompaloompa - 28/10/2019 12:00

Today, I used a self-tanning towelette to help even out my tan lines and disguise my vitiligo a bit. Now my stomach is orange and my spots are even more noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 315

You deserved it 461

teqifsha 0

Monday 22 August 2011 8:49

Your fault

Jacobt24 19

Monday 22 August 2011 8:49

You didn't correct her before she started spraying? YDI

Comments

SlickWillyTFCF 5

Monday 22 August 2011 9:08

It's the middle of the summer, why don't you go outside and tan like a normal person instead of paying for some fake bullshit like an idiot?

soopafreak 11

Monday 22 August 2011 10:01

Because you can't get skin cancer and wrinkles from fake-and-bake? You keep believing that... and I have some ocean front property in AZ I'll sell you for cheap too.

jvillan87 5

Monday 22 August 2011 10:16

What's the asking price for that oceanfront property. I'll take it.

ShroomsOnAcid 16

Tuesday 23 August 2011 2:44

While I definitely prefer being my feta cheese pale self, not going out in the sun and getting some color caught up with me eventually in the form of vitamin D deficiency. Chances are you're not getting enough of it either if you're pale.

Neshalicious84 0

Monday 22 August 2011 9:11

yDI for wanting to.change urself... Thats what u get

Munchkin13 6

Monday 22 August 2011 9:18

Did she know you were joking?

Mysanitywins 10

Monday 22 August 2011 10:33

Clearly, or else no FML.

cBlackout 13

Monday 22 August 2011 9:22

Sucks for you, snooki

THE_A_TEEN 27

Monday 22 August 2011 9:22

YDI dude GOD DAMN IT someone did an oompa loompa joke... Aw the hell with it op I bet you look like the illigitimate love child of a human and an oompa loompa

SoNotForYou 5

Monday 22 August 2011 9:22

That was f'ing stupid. Today I was at work and an idiot said he wanted a spray tan. I asked him what shade - he said the darkest. Well apparently he was kidding and now I am unemployed.

beauty2646 0

Monday 22 August 2011 9:24

You seriously expected her to know you were kidding? Or are that obnoxious where you think its ok to be sarcastic to random strangers and expect them to pick up on it?