Miscellaneous: Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted...

By Sally - 22/08/2011 00:17 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 899

You deserved it 69 423

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Same thing different taste

Lava lamp

By Kathleen Verhaegen - 30/04/2020 20:00

Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 389

You deserved it 296

Trumped

By Anonymous - 23/10/2019 18:00

Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 1 731

By waytootan - 22/08/2011 20:34 - United States

Today, I came in to work looking very tan. I took Friday off to go to a friend's funeral, which was outdoors, and I tan very easily. Now my boss and everyone else thinks I lied about my friend's death to get off work on a Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 019

You deserved it 3 130

By Anonymous - 10/01/2011 19:06 - Denmark

Today, I decided to try a self-tanning lotion my friend had recommended. I put it on, and decided to take a nap. I woke up later and checked myself in the mirror, expecting to see a new, more tanned version of myself. I didn't. I'm now orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 586

You deserved it 39 978

By fishwizard - 02/06/2017 20:00

Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 735

You deserved it 3 971

By blotchy-girl - 15/07/2009 04:00 - New Zealand

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 064

You deserved it 6 737

By tan disaster - 27/02/2009 23:09 - United States

Today, I went to get my spray tan before my semi-formal. After I applied lotion to the bottom of my feet as instructed, I went in the booth and began to start the tanning session. I lost my balance and fell right as the machine began to spray. I look like a spotted cheetah. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 522

You deserved it 39 343

By thatsucks4u - 14/08/2010 00:56 - United States

Today, I went to a tanning salon. I guess nobody mentioned that you have to lift your fat rolls or you'll end up with weird stripes where the spray never reached. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 090

You deserved it 51 160

Lookin' good

By racoonface - 19/04/2009 15:17 - United States

Today, it was lovely outside so I decided to tan outside. I burn pretty easily, so I put on sunscreen. I fell asleep on my side, so when I woke up, I had a massive burn on only one side of my body, with sunglass lines. Tomorrow, I have a job interview. I'm going to go in looking like a racoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 680

You deserved it 54 755

New, from L'Oréal!

By oompaloompa - 28/10/2019 12:00

Today, I used a self-tanning towelette to help even out my tan lines and disguise my vitiligo a bit. Now my stomach is orange and my spots are even more noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 315

You deserved it 461

teqifsha 0

Monday 22 August 2011 8:49

Your fault

Jacobt24 19

Monday 22 August 2011 8:49

You didn't correct her before she started spraying? YDI

Comments

oops_im_fucked 8

Monday 22 August 2011 21:53

Oompa-loompa duppidy doo! What will you do when snooki is the name of you?!

alinka_fml 0

Monday 22 August 2011 22:08

Thats what you get for being an idiot

lilmillion22 5

Monday 22 August 2011 22:10

It's idiots like you that make me keep coming back to FML

stupdude3 8

Monday 22 August 2011 22:30

So, are you like, black now?

oops_im_fucked 8

Tuesday 23 August 2011 1:36

No, she's a now known as a snooki

stupdude3 8

Monday 22 August 2011 22:32

Today, I went to a restaurant. The waitress asked me what food I want. As a joke, I asked for a burger. I got a burger. FML

psuedodragon 23

Monday 22 August 2011 23:10

I think the only way OP could've been any more YDI is if it went something like... "Today I picked up some of the darkest self-tanner as a joke. I turned out super orange. FML"

Gemmy_44 7

Monday 22 August 2011 23:33

"Today, I got a spray tan." Could've ended right there and still been an FML. Everyone I've ever known who's gotten one of those shitty spray tans has regretted it. Self-tanning should be similar to going from dark hair to platinum blonde--you should do it gradually to make it look natural. You'd be better off buying a $10 bottle of self-tanner and some latex gloves at Walmart and doing it yourself in your bathroom. Just remember to exfoliate first and don't overapply to knuckles, knees, or elbows. The feet are tricky, too. Oh hell, just go outside with a drink and a book and get brown naturally.