Miscellaneous: Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn...

By Anonymous - 13/11/2011 08:40 - Canada

Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 944

You deserved it 2 502

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Same thing different taste

By overthehorizon - 27/07/2009 17:25 - United States

Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire 2 acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 549

You deserved it 4 207

By Anonymous - 01/06/2013 20:50 - United States

Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 031

You deserved it 4 416

Priorities

By karina17 - 18/10/2009 05:03 - Canada

Today, my dad was supposed to come see me for our twice-a-year visit. He was 3 hours late. So I called, and asked him why he was late. He said, "Oh, something came up." I asked him what was so important. Apparently, the garage needed cleaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 396

You deserved it 2 329

By What. - 14/08/2013 00:08 - United States - Pawtucket

Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 071

You deserved it 3 568

By Anonymous - 17/08/2013 10:52 - United States

Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 147

You deserved it 7 988

By Anonymous - 21/05/2014 16:05 - United States - New York

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 863

You deserved it 4 377

shrinks into corner

By Ally - 24/03/2018 05:00

Today, my dad decided to be an awesome person and fold my laundry without telling me. Later, I heard my parents having a conversation about a pair of panties that were "like dental floss" and which sister they belonged to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 743

You deserved it 658

By Adrian16 - 18/01/2010 11:01 - Norway

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 410

You deserved it 65 708

By RiceCrispyTreats - 01/09/2015 16:46 - United States - Pelham

Today, I left my phone outside on the grass while I went inside to get a drink. I didn't expect my dad to run over it with the lawn mower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 863

You deserved it 28 380

Hiya!

By Jon - 05/05/2009 00:46 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics, I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 539

You deserved it 47 390

FUUUandyourmom 16

Sunday 13 November 2011 16:12

Was he drunk?

Poetaster 10

Sunday 13 November 2011 16:12

Daddy needs some therapy

Comments

kei1108 13

Monday 9 April 2012 0:16

...... *facepalm* XD Hahaha!! I'm sorry, OP. That's super weird..

ForeverJasmine 26

Sunday 5 October 2014 8:22

Maybe he's trying to find his marbles since he lost them?:D

kpetrovski 24

Friday 31 October 2014 13:52

Oh WELL then, carry on!

monster1109 18

Saturday 17 October 2015 15:24

Is it fake grass? My sister has that and you're supposed to vaccum it

TheLynx_fml 20

Tuesday 31 May 2016 13:31

His marbles are in ******* China

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Animals Dogs Gamers Ironic Video games Zoom

The Top

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 104

You deserved it 3 775

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from high school at the exact pizza shop we met at where I worked in high school. She broke it off with me after she caught me cheating with her best friend. These days, she's a lawyer who makes six figures a year. I still work at the same pizza shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 306

You deserved it 125 969

The Top

Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 529

You deserved it 4 354

Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 450

You deserved it 3 556

Today, at work, I went to place a small item on a shelf. The shelf fell on me, trapping my hand. While lifting it, the top shelf fell against my chest and the products all dumped on my face. I then realized the shelves were only held up by zip ties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 851

You deserved it 364

Today, my daughter decided she wants to be a Pokémon for Halloween. To practice the look, she used fabric dye because she thought it would look cool on her skin. Only she decided to dress as Jynx and instead of looking cool, she looks like a racist idiot in blackface. She posted pics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 240

You deserved it 190

Today, I realized I’m not my boyfriend’s “type” anymore. People say I’m beautiful but I guess he wants the filtered, social media-butterfly type. He won’t break up with me because he doesn’t want to be the bad guy, considering everything I’ve done and do for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 359

You deserved it 162

Today, I volunteered to tutor a 17-year-old girl in science. I had to explain in detail of what the real Big Bang theory was, as she only knew about the show. Later, I heard I was reported by her because apparently, "I was trying to convert her to Scientology." I now know why she needed a tutor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 236

You deserved it 2 659

Same thing different taste

Priorities

*shrinks into corner*

Hiya!

Top comments

Comments

shrinks into corner