Love: Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I...

By NotRussian - 03/10/2011 04:15 - United States

Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I was about to invite him back to my place for a nightcap, he took out a catalog of Russian mail-order brides and asked for my help in picking out the best one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 012

You deserved it 3 452

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

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By ElodieUNU - 12/07/2013 19:33 - France

Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 144

You deserved it 7 788

Bat out of hell

By goodeyesight - 11/10/2012 14:02 - Brazil - Sào Paulo

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 361

You deserved it 31 749

Tonight, on Blind Dates…

By dateless - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - London

Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 437

You deserved it 2 419

Reverse Uno card

By BlackCheetah101 - 04/11/2009 06:51 - Australia

Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend, "You're kidding, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 481

You deserved it 9 909

Is this catfishing?

By Anonymous - 01/04/2023 06:00

Today, I went on a date with someone I've been talking to online for weeks. Unfortunately, it turns out they'd used old photos and misrepresented themselves, and I didn't find them attractive at all. Even I'm not that desperate. We ended up having an awkward dinner and I couldn't wait for it to be over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 729

You deserved it 201

Don't be that guy

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 03:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was set up on my first blind date since my divorce. My expectations were low, but when she showed up, she was a smoking hot. She was way out of my league, she was delightful and kind throughout the date, but my low confidence shined through. That night she acquired an expensive dinner and a stalker. Me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 1 432

Bland date

By tomtomcutiepoof - 13/03/2009 00:38 - United States

Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 259

You deserved it 7 635

By ohforchristssake - 21/09/2015 02:15 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a cute guy I recognized from one of my classes messaged me on a dating site. He wanted help with homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 927

You deserved it 2 155

By Tiffosaur - 04/01/2013 06:12 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 008

You deserved it 2 653

Been there, done that

By Anonymous - 05/08/2014 02:00 - United States - New Ulm

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 876

You deserved it 4 615

Buttsexpirate 9

Monday 3 October 2011 12:01

Aww you to are already making decisions together! Haha don't fall too much in love you crazy kids it's only the first date.

abceasyas123abc 12

Monday 3 October 2011 12:04

Maybe this was his way of escaping a bad date which was about to get worse?

Comments

Buttsexpirate 9

Monday 3 October 2011 12:01

Aww you to are already making decisions together! Haha don't fall too much in love you crazy kids it's only the first date.

gntfmlingnow 12

Monday 3 October 2011 12:26

She must have been boring as hell for him to pull out an excuse like that.

LiveLaughFML 10

Monday 3 October 2011 13:19

"i don't understand the handwriting." "they're Russian." "i don't care how fast they were going!"

abceasyas123abc 12

Monday 3 October 2011 12:04

Maybe this was his way of escaping a bad date which was about to get worse?

actingbro 3

Tuesday 4 October 2011 4:35

I'm using that next time I have a bad date lol

ChrisTheCalm 9

Monday 3 October 2011 12:04

WTF? Time to leave ...

NomOnShroomz 14

Monday 3 October 2011 14:32

WTF? Why would she leave her place?

max_wilder 9

Tuesday 4 October 2011 4:20

WTF? Those magazines actually exist!

ChrisTheCalm 9

Tuesday 4 October 2011 13:31

Yeah why would she do that. I was talking about leaving that guy. You're a moron.

Celesta 11

Monday 3 October 2011 12:06

Well did you help him?

Abdul888 16

Monday 3 October 2011 14:58

haha probably yeah just to act as if she didn't care.

sexylol_fml 4

Tuesday 4 October 2011 5:00

I would of just picked the ugliest one!

melikesfml 11

Tuesday 1 May 2012 22:01

44 nice pict. Straight off google images? Thats where my friend got that pict too

Fekenator 0

Monday 3 October 2011 12:06

Hey, he's just looking for a good third in bed. Cut a guy some slack!

mishkaroni 15

Monday 3 October 2011 12:06

That's always a sign the date went well

indistructo 3

Monday 3 October 2011 12:10

look at OP's username lol

nonelikeworms 0

Monday 3 October 2011 12:10

They have those? I have no idea how to get one.

saIty 17

Monday 3 October 2011 12:12

"Ooo the one with the flamethrower looks nice!"

btnhdude 0

Monday 3 October 2011 12:13

In russia, these jokes are new!

Keywords

Relatable Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Health Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Love Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Video games

The Top

Today, I found out that when my best friend and I were kids, our parents would cancel playdates when either of us opted to not go to church. They said it would, "strengthen our faith." We are now both adults and staunch atheists for that reason, and we're spending way more time together to make up for this crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 144

Ahoy ship's boys and girls ! Today we're heading to France. Be ready to face rain, storm and beer because Lille is welcoming us, and believe me, it's not Los Angeles. Do you all have your raincoats? -Bonjour ! First of all, present yourself ma jol...

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 16

The Top

Today, I got turned down by the person who has been wanting to date me for five months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 258

You deserved it 1 073

Today, after 3 months of my man claiming he's going to start eating better "next week", he finally went on a diet. What changed? I started eating healthy while trying for a baby. He is "supporting me" by getting me to do extra meal prep for him too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 354

You deserved it 353

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 151

You deserved it 4 518

Today, I came home at noon from a long night out. I was surprised to see a woman I didn't recognize standing in my living room in a brown dress and heels. As I walked up to the door and knocked to be let in, the woman whipped around and I figured out who it was. My dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 512

You deserved it 3 437

Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 182

You deserved it 653

Choose your fave, watch them go!

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 162

Same thing different taste

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