Love: Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I...

By NotRussian - 03/10/2011 04:15 - United States

Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I was about to invite him back to my place for a nightcap, he took out a catalog of Russian mail-order brides and asked for my help in picking out the best one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 012

You deserved it 3 451

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next!

By ElodieUNU - 12/07/2013 19:33 - France

Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 142

You deserved it 7 788

Bat out of hell

By goodeyesight - 11/10/2012 14:02 - Brazil - Sào Paulo

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 361

You deserved it 31 748

By dateless - 21/09/2012 11:48 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 138

You deserved it 2 365

Reverse Uno card

By BlackCheetah101 - 04/11/2009 06:51 - Australia

Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend, "You're kidding, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 480

You deserved it 9 909

Is this catfishing?

By Anonymous - 01/04/2023 06:00

Today, I went on a date with someone I've been talking to online for weeks. Unfortunately, it turns out they'd used old photos and misrepresented themselves, and I didn't find them attractive at all. Even I'm not that desperate. We ended up having an awkward dinner and I couldn't wait for it to be over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 201

Don't be that guy

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 03:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was set up on my first blind date since my divorce. My expectations were low, but when she showed up, she was a smoking hot. She was way out of my league, she was delightful and kind throughout the date, but my low confidence shined through. That night she acquired an expensive dinner and a stalker. Me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 1 431

Bland date

By tomtomcutiepoof - 13/03/2009 00:38 - United States

Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 259

You deserved it 7 634

By ohforchristssake - 21/09/2015 02:15 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a cute guy I recognized from one of my classes messaged me on a dating site. He wanted help with homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 927

You deserved it 2 155

By Tiffosaur - 04/01/2013 06:12 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 008

You deserved it 2 652

Been there, done that

By Anonymous - 05/08/2014 02:00 - United States - New Ulm

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 875

You deserved it 4 615

Buttsexpirate 9

Monday 3 October 2011 12:01

Aww you to are already making decisions together! Haha don't fall too much in love you crazy kids it's only the first date.

abceasyas123abc 12

Monday 3 October 2011 12:04

Maybe this was his way of escaping a bad date which was about to get worse?

Comments

Buttsexpirate 9

Monday 3 October 2011 12:01

Aww you to are already making decisions together! Haha don't fall too much in love you crazy kids it's only the first date.

gntfmlingnow 12

Monday 3 October 2011 12:26

She must have been boring as hell for him to pull out an excuse like that.

LiveLaughFML 10

Monday 3 October 2011 13:19

"i don't understand the handwriting." "they're Russian." "i don't care how fast they were going!"

abceasyas123abc 12

Monday 3 October 2011 12:04

Maybe this was his way of escaping a bad date which was about to get worse?

actingbro 3

Tuesday 4 October 2011 4:35

I'm using that next time I have a bad date lol

ChrisTheCalm 9

Monday 3 October 2011 12:04

WTF? Time to leave ...

NomOnShroomz 14

Monday 3 October 2011 14:32

WTF? Why would she leave her place?

max_wilder 9

Tuesday 4 October 2011 4:20

WTF? Those magazines actually exist!

ChrisTheCalm 9

Tuesday 4 October 2011 13:31

Yeah why would she do that. I was talking about leaving that guy. You're a moron.

Celesta 11

Monday 3 October 2011 12:06

Well did you help him?

Abdul888 16

Monday 3 October 2011 14:58

haha probably yeah just to act as if she didn't care.

sexylol_fml 4

Tuesday 4 October 2011 5:00

I would of just picked the ugliest one!

melikesfml 11

Tuesday 1 May 2012 22:01

44 nice pict. Straight off google images? Thats where my friend got that pict too

Fekenator 0

Monday 3 October 2011 12:06

Hey, he's just looking for a good third in bed. Cut a guy some slack!

mishkaroni 15

Monday 3 October 2011 12:06

That's always a sign the date went well

indistructo 3

Monday 3 October 2011 12:10

look at OP's username lol

nonelikeworms 0

Monday 3 October 2011 12:10

They have those? I have no idea how to get one.

saIty 17

Monday 3 October 2011 12:12

"Ooo the one with the flamethrower looks nice!"

btnhdude 0

Monday 3 October 2011 12:13

In russia, these jokes are new!

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Neighbours Wanker Lonely Halloween Party Jealousy Love Argument Fight Family Animals Cats Parents Sports Embarrassing Health Shopping Medication Anger issues Birds Weddings Pranks YouTube TikTok Cute Dogs Work AITA

The Top

USA, USA, USA, and more precisely Philadelphia. That's where we're landing today. When I first discovered Justin, on 9gag or an awesome website like that, I knew exactly this little guy was perfect to fit in the FML illustrated section. His crazy, c...

I agree, your life sucks 8

You deserved it 8

Today, I rode a skateboard down a street past a busy two-story outdoor cafe. As I rode by, a group of people thought it'd be funny to kick stray pebbles at my wheels, trying to make me trip. It worked. My backpack ripped open in the process letting all my school-work float away in the wind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 868

You deserved it 1 935

The Top

Today, while shopping, a lady came up to me and asked if she could borrow my baby because, "Y'know, I'm in a hurry and they'll let me checkout first." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 326

You deserved it 2 699

Today, I realized that at age 54, I'm no longer young enough to go commando anymore. Every time I sneezed today, I peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 742

You deserved it 12 945

Today, a colleague told me he was pretending to be me on a dating site, and that he has four pending dates. Last time I tried being myself, my first and only date pushed me down some stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 923

You deserved it 1 701

Today, a cab driver had to sign me out of the emergency room because I didn't know who else to call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 137

You deserved it 4 421

Today, I found out the animal that was gnawing behind the kitchen wall all night was indeed a wild rat and his entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 980

You deserved it 2 874

Today, and in the past week since became a full-time dad to my 16 year-old son, he's got caught sneaking out at night, lost his virginity, and I had to call the cops because he was caught trying to go two states over to be with said girl. I think he's trying to make me look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 208

You deserved it 341

Same thing different taste

Next!

Bat out of hell

Reverse Uno card

Is this catfishing?

Don't be that guy

Bland date

Been there, done that

Top comments

Comments