Intimacy: Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a...

By Anonymous - 09/10/2010 05:15 - New Zealand

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 266

You deserved it 9 787

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Same thing different taste

No kinkshaming on FML

By Anonymous - 31/07/2013 16:28 - Belgium - Ieper

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 706

You deserved it 9 334

By damnit - 16/10/2009 17:27 - United States

Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 713

You deserved it 4 272

Hott

By disturbedgd - 03/04/2017 20:00 - South Africa - Durban

Today, I had my first steamy wet dream. It involved the Power Rangers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 179

You deserved it 1 110

Poor old Kermit

By FrogMyLife - 30/07/2021 14:59 - United Kingdom - Rickmansworth

Today, I've been single for so long, I very nearly had a wet dream about an anthropomorphic frog. A FROG. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 200

Inactive

By inbogota - 06/03/2021 15:30 - Colombia

Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 162

By margelover - 11/10/2011 19:06 - Denmark

Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 132

You deserved it 9 045

By Anonymous - 18/08/2015 13:26 - United States - Manchester

Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 336

You deserved it 4 027

Unfulfilled

By Anonymous - 28/03/2021 00:00 - Romania - Campina

Today, my alarm rang just as I was about to have a wet dream with my husband. This is the closest I got to having sex in weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 070

You deserved it 155

By urgg - 05/09/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 915

You deserved it 5 025

Night terror

By unlovedandunfucked - 10/12/2014 18:16 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 768

You deserved it 4 560

Shakabrah 0

Saturday 9 October 2010 15:54

what the duck

insanestab 0

Saturday 9 October 2010 15:55

haha rubber ducky IS the one

Comments

BlackMoon_fml 9

Thursday 14 October 2010 20:23

Kinky.

lancegonyeau 0

Friday 15 October 2010 5:46

gives a whole new meaning to go **** a duck

gbaby2454 0

Monday 18 October 2010 18:54

wow. u obviously havent gotten it in in a long long time

Kitten345 5

Thursday 21 October 2010 5:31

I laughed at that! then I saw that you were a man... ...*awkward silence*....

KissableinCarson 0

Friday 22 October 2010 22:40

haa haa.....ur sick and hillarious!

spade1997 0

Thursday 28 October 2010 8:27

wat were u doing tht day?

MrAdventure 1

Friday 29 October 2010 19:51

Was he "about to put the hammer down"? We got us a convoy.....

jakeisawake 3

Wednesday 3 November 2010 22:40

You just took *********** to a new level. Ha, sorry bruh.

Trencher21 0

Monday 22 November 2010 2:02

hahahahhahahahahahhahahaha u must be so alone

xobarbienickkxo 4

Thursday 10 March 2011 6:18

Hello Mr Weasly

Keywords

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The Top

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 341

You deserved it 403

Today, I told my son to get a job and start paying rent. Five minutes later he transferred me rent for the next 5 years. When I demanded to know where he got that kind of money, he showed me his bank statements. He’s made more money mining Bitcoin than I’ve made in 15 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 273

You deserved it 1 363

The Top

Toda, while I was on a Zoom interview for a potential new career, one of my family members screamed, "Well that's a kick in the dick!" It was so loud, the recruiter immediately told me to have a nice day and abruptly ended the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 141

You deserved it 149

Today, I found out that my recurring acne is actually bedbug bites. I have wasted about a hundred dollars on acne cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 364

You deserved it 7 612

Today, while out hiking, my phone slipped out of my pocket. I caught it and gave it to my little cousin, giving her a "special mission" to keep it safe. When we got back to our cars later, I asked her for my phone back. Turns out she left it under a shrub back in the hills so it'd be "safe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 336

You deserved it 38 519

Today, I've been yawning every few minutes. Which would be fine, except every couple of yawns my jaw dislocates, and I have to put it back in place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 195

You deserved it 349

Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 602

You deserved it 5 826

Today, I was on a crowded bus on the way back from my boyfriend's when I suddenly had a terrible nose bleed. I had no tissues, so instead I had to use last night's underwear from my bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 385

You deserved it 5 386