Kids: Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed...

By HttpsHaileyy - 15/06/2015 20:02 - United States

Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 795

You deserved it 9 592

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Same thing different taste

By poop - 03/04/2013 18:45

Today, my sister gave my laptop away and dumped a pile of her hamster's turds on my bed. All of this because I flushed the toilet while she was in the shower last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 899

You deserved it 6 617

By Anonymous - 27/09/2013 20:33 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I broke up with my abusive girlfriend. She responded by breaking into my place and stabbing my hamster with a fork. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 005

You deserved it 4 556

By Anonymous - 03/08/2013 17:59 - United States - Santa Rosa Beach

Today, my hamster had babies. I came home just in time to witness her kick the mutilated bodies of her two babies out of her house, then crawl back in and go to sleep. Now my sister refuses to touch her and calls her a "baby-eating demon." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 856

You deserved it 4 315

So…

By Anonymous - 29/03/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 762

You deserved it 7 622

By gvmfvr - 08/05/2014 20:48 - France - Fontenay-sous-bois

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 179

You deserved it 3 962

By vkryss13 - 22/06/2015 19:10 - Guam - Tamuning

Today, I accidentally sat on my sister's imaginary monkey. She then stabbed me with a pencil. I still can't get the piece of graphite out of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 433

You deserved it 2 518

By bloody hell - 04/06/2015 05:59 - Philippines - Para?aque

Today, my sister and I had a fight. In her rage, she threw piles of dirty laundry at me. One of her bloody panties hit me on the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 981

You deserved it 3 860

By Anonymous - 15/11/2010 21:31 - Ireland

Today, I accidentally left my sister's hamster's cage open and it escaped. My dad recently put mouse traps down. Guess where I found her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 910

You deserved it 34 858

Poor little guy

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 14:01

Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 166

Affectionate, huh?

By littlemiss - 10/02/2013 16:17 - Canada - Whitby

Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 662

You deserved it 3 051

Stillo 25

Monday 15 June 2015 23:47

That's not a very polite hamster she's got there

xJChristine 16

Monday 15 June 2015 23:45

why would you insult a hamster? still not a good reason to hit you though

Comments

lumene 17

Tuesday 16 June 2015 9:02

That sounds messy...

looms123 9

Tuesday 16 June 2015 11:44

stool as in chair, not stool as in excrement...right?

Paws_Cat 29

Tuesday 16 June 2015 12:54

Viva la hermie!

brandon3747 16

Tuesday 16 June 2015 16:04

What a strong hamster

Bindairdundat 2

Tuesday 16 June 2015 16:33

Damn... never insult a hamster that is strong enough to smash you with a stool...

Creed_Aprooved 12

Tuesday 16 June 2015 18:33

WATCH OUT WATCH OUT, OHHHH NOOO RANDY ORTON DOES IT AGAIN

AmayaR 12

Tuesday 16 June 2015 19:22

Modifiers are VERY important

jinxy333 13

Tuesday 16 June 2015 19:57

if you were using english like that at the time i think it may have been justified XD

Ericisme 9

Tuesday 16 June 2015 19:59

what I'm taking away from this is. ...your little sister kicked your ass !!

MichelleMaBelle_fml 16

Tuesday 16 June 2015 22:22

What did the hamster ever do to you?

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Sex Roommate Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 004

You deserved it 42 709

Today, I fulfilled my lifelong dream of going on a family trip to Disneyland. Less than two hours in the park, my kids have been scared shitless by every single character, they don’t want to ride any rides, my husband is drunk, and the mouse ears headband gave me a vomit-inducing migraine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 150

You deserved it 361

The Top

Today, despite the fact that we love each other and are perfect together, my boyfriend still refuses to leave his wife. Apparently it will "mess his kids up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 2 830

Today, I halted a cab. It was 12 degrees and snowing outside. When I went to get in, a man shoved me away and I slipped on ice into dirty snow slush, and he stole my cab. As it drove off, the man flipped me off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 557

You deserved it 2 453

Today, my two year old daughter was playing in the kitchen. I went to go have a look and she was pretend cooking. When I asked what she was making she said "look mommy, chocolate!" and stuck her finger in my mouth. It wasn't chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 201

You deserved it 6 186

Today, my husband of five years left me for a woman ten years older than himself who lives nine hours away. He met her online two weeks ago while playing Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 918

You deserved it 2 694

Today, I was in the elevator, when a big bearded guy stepped in, wearing a dress. It's not an uncommon sight where I live, but my friend cracked up and asked him if he was wearing underwear. He took it as a challenge, and I can safely say that no, he was not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 135

You deserved it 6 811

Today, I secured a tender for my boss, earning her 1/4 million in profits. Today is also meant to be pay-day for us, but my boss is too busy dealing with the tender to pay her employees. So essentially, I made my boss rich while remaining broke and in debt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 697

You deserved it 954

Same thing different taste

So…

Poor little guy

Affectionate, huh?

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