Singing

Can it, Whitney!

By Anonymous - 10/10/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I discovered that my neighbors had held a secret "meeting" to discuss how annoying my "constant singing" as I go about my days in my apartment. They even made a petition, with over ten signatures, asking me to "cease and desist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 152

You deserved it 490

Hang in there

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was singing the National Anthem at a school game and totally forgot the words. So I kept singing the same two lines over and over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 703

You deserved it 34 670

Turn around, Bright Eyes

By Alma - 01/10/2024 20:00 - Japan - Osaka

Today, I was at a karaoke bar. After a few drinks, I gave it a go. Halfway through “Total Eclipse of the Heart” I got so into it, I knocked over the mic stand. The mic flew off, hit the DJ, who then hit the emergency stop button, cutting off the music. I froze as the bar erupted into laughter. I did get a free Coke for my “performance,” which was something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 319

You deserved it 185

"If I could turn back time…"

By inappropes - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I came into work early to clean equipment, with my headphones on, singing to myself. I lost track of time, and wound up with the entire office watching me belt tunes out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 501

You deserved it 992

So grateful

By Tough Crowd - 07/07/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I called my aunt to wish her a happy birthday. My mom and I proceeded to sing "Happy Birthday" to her. The first words that came out of her mouth were, "You guys are terrible singers." You're welcome, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 170

Heaven knows I'm miserable now

By Morrissey2.0 - 17/06/2024 14:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I was singing my heart out in the shower, convinced I was alone. Turns out my roommate had friends over, and they could hear everything through the bathroom vent. Now, they keep requesting encore performances of my renditions of songs by The Smiths. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 161

Excuses, excuses

By Anonymous - 07/05/2024 06:00 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, I arse-dialled my ex while drunkenly singing karaoke at a bar. She picked up just in time to hear me belting out a heartfelt rendition of "I Will Survive." I don't think she bought my "pocket dial" excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 235

Private talent show

By Juan - 24/04/2024 03:00 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, we live in a terraced house with very thin walls. For no reason, I sang "Una paloma blanca, I have a huge hairy cock" loudly in the bathroom. I walked down the garden path and encountered my neighbour, who laughed and sang "Una paloma blanca" whilst nodding knowingly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 488

Sing it again

By Anonymous - 23/04/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I just learned that the silly song my parents taught me as a small child, and would sometimes make me sing for the family, is actually a very thinly veiled series of penis jokes. Why just now? Because I hadn't thought about it for years, until my grandma brought it up at a reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 423

You deserved it 80

The Voice

By NotChadKrouger - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I was auditioning for a talent show. I asked my girlfriend if I could sing to her before I went. She said sure. Thirty seconds in, she got up and mumbled, "You're only going to embarrass yourself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 739

You deserved it 15 159

RIP

By funnnyyyyy -_- - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Nepal - Kathmandu

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked, I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 241

You deserved it 6 720

Misophonist or misogynist?

By Knot in my throat - 12/09/2023 00:02

Today, my boyfriend said to me, in front of his friends, “Can you stop breaking out into song all the time? It’s getting really annoying.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 847

The X factor

By May need earplugs - 05/08/2023 01:00 - United States

Today, my roommate sings in his room a lot. He has a horrible singing voice, but his dog trying to harmonize with him by howling at the top of its lungs makes it even more unbearable. Worst duet performance ever. And he does it every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 710

You deserved it 127

I HATE MUSICALS!

By lesson.learned - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Littlehampton

Today, I dragged my boyfriend to see Les Misérables with me. He now refuses to communicate with me through any medium other than singing. Apparently, this is his revenge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 252

You deserved it 51 277

The voice

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Madison

Today, after finishing a song during karaoke, a man came up to me and held out his hand. Quite flattered, I shook it, said thanks and that I was glad he enjoyed it. Turns out he was next and just wanted the microphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 506

You deserved it 10 163

No more yodelling

By Anonymous - 05/03/2023 00:00

Today, I was singing in the shower and my neighbor called the police because they thought I was in trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 067

You deserved it 232

Roommates from hell, part 4765

By SHUT UUUUUP - 02/03/2023 23:00 - United States

Today, I've found that it's hard to focus on important things when your roommate won't stop singing at the top of his lungs, without any music playing mind you, especially when his singing voice sounds like a cat being forced through a meat grinder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 761

You deserved it 92

In New York, concrete jungle wet dream tomato

By Anonymous - 18/02/2023 02:00

Today, my brain seemingly went on vacation and I forgot the lyrics to a song I was performing in front of a live audience, so I ended up ad-libbing a bunch of garbage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 688

You deserved it 292

Waxing lyrical

By Anonymous - 09/02/2023 04:00

Today, at a party, I tried to play it cool by pretending to know all the lyrics to a song, but ended up singing the wrong words and embarrassing myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 1 031

I'm the main character!

By Singer - 08/01/2023 03:00

Today, I found out why my friends don’t invite me to Karaoke Thursday Nights anymore. Apparently, I act like a “show off” and “presumptuous” and make the others feel bad. It’s not my fault I have a decent singing voice. I guess they don’t like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 1 594

Pipe down Mariah

By Confidenceruined - 28/12/2022 18:00

Today, we were at a friend’s birthday party and it was time to sing Happy Birthday. My crush was there. Wanting to impress him, I started out-singing everyone with runs and riffs. Someone said, “It’s just Happy Birthday, it’s not that serious, wannabe American Idol.” Everyone, including him, laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 2 288

The Voice

By Stage Fright - 05/12/2022 00:00

Today, my roommate eavesdropped on me singing. When I realized he was there, he said I was "fucking incredible" and asked me to do another song. There's just one issue: I only sing well when I'm alone. The result was predictably bad. If it was possible to literally die of embarrassment, I wouldn't be writing this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 789

You deserved it 168

Canadian or American?

By BIGMOUTHD00D - 18/11/2022 02:00

Today, there was a karaoke at my job's Thanksgiving party. A girl sang and sounded horrible. I later told a colleague about it and said, "She sucked so bad… if I wanted to hear an animal dying, I'd go to a slaughterhouse." She was within earshot and burst into tears. Oh, and she's my boss's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 1 655

The Sopranos

By Anonymous - 14/11/2022 16:00 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I had been practicing for a solo in a choir I’m in. I finally got it down and was all ready to audition. On audition night, the choir director let me try out, then decided all the sopranos should sing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 801

You deserved it 123

Judge Judy

By mother of a weirdo - 20/07/2022 16:00

Today, my teenage daughter came out into the living room and began belting out a song. When I cleared my throat, she screamed, turned beet red, and said, “I THOUGHT I WAS ALONE!” She’d been hiding all day, and to say I'm judging her would be an understatement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 739

You deserved it 487

It's easy if you try

By Notalent - 24/05/2022 06:00

Today, I did a tribute to Ukraine at my school’s end of the year talent show by singing “Imagine.” by John Lennon. I thought I did well, until a group of guys in the audience began roaring with laughter and pointing. Then more people followed. I didn’t finish the song and left the stage bawling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 506

You deserved it 339

Yodelling

By Anonymous - 04/05/2022 04:00

Today, I found out that I can only sing well when I'm absolutely certain that no one can hear me. On the rare occasion that people can actually hear me, they always say I "sound just like Elvis." Unfortunately, when I try to sing in front of other people, I sound more like a teenage boy who just started puberty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 740

You deserved it 155

"She's a very kinky girl…"

By MB101 - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went to sing at karaoke. I sang a romantic love ballad to him. He dedicated Rick James's "Super Freak" to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 720

You deserved it 5 511

Screeching

By sdd - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Switzerland - Lotzwil

Today, I was chatting with my choir leader. I told him that I have been thinking about taking singing lessons. His immediate reaction was, "Thank God, finally!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 810

You deserved it 6 862

Grounded

By Cerise - 05/03/2022 18:00

Today, my sister commented that she wants to audition for The Voice and that she’s sure she’ll make it to the finals. I said, “You have to have raw talent to do so.” I realized the severity of my comment too late as she teared up and stormed out of the room. My mom took my Macbook and car keys away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 732

You deserved it 455

Keywords

Halloween Animals Dogs Cute Fire Awkward Miscellaneous Mental health Therapy Health Friends Love Birthday Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Work Kids Thief Customers Argument TV shows AITA Am I overreacting? My ex Social Media Parents Dating Family Zoom Relatable

The Top

Today, a friend came over to meet my new dog. The dog got excited and accidentally peed on him. I went to the kitchen to get something to clean it up. When I came back, my new dog was covered in my friend's pee. My friend claimed that peeing on my dog "showed dominance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 337

You deserved it 170

Today, I tried to speak to my wife about my feelings for this coming year, family and work. I thought it wouldn't be a problem as I regularly listen and support her with her feelings, emotional issues, anxiety, depression, etc. She shut me down in 30 seconds and said to stop acting like my mother and being so stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 334

You deserved it 117

The Top

Today, I found out that my phone fits perfectly through the slot between the elevator and the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 734

You deserved it 4 861

Today, a girl puked on me. No warnings, nothing. She just threw up on me, then walked off like nothing even happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 052

You deserved it 3 146

Today, I met the exchange student who will be living with us for a year. As we were talking, she told me that she doesn't like reading, writing, drawing, athletics, watching television or listening to music. What does she like to do during her free time? Study. It's going to be a long year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 619

You deserved it 267

Today, I finally realized why my 9-week-old puppy was going to the bathroom so much. I went to pick up the food bag and realized she had chewed a hole in the bottom, and eaten half of the bag in the last 4 days. Goodbye 30 pounds of dog food, and 100$ for a vet visit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 385

You deserved it 1 790

Today, I slipped and fell on a sudden patch of ice, on a road that had been completely fine until then, so I decided to push my bike past the icy patch before getting back on. Little did I know, the ice continued for the entire rest of the road, which was another 3km. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 120

Today, I wanted to experience the free breeze while riding on my bike, so I skipped wearing a helmet for the first time in a long while. I got fined just two minutes after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 1 165