Animals: Today, I let my new cat sleep in bed with me. It was cute until... - FML

By Anonymous - 31/07/2016 16:45 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I let my new cat sleep in bed with me. It was cute until she wiped a tapeworm onto my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 133

You deserved it 2 299

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Same thing different taste

By Brinty - 13/03/2010 05:18 - Australia

Today, my new anti-social cat started rubbing on my leg. I thought she must be warming up to me. Then, I looked at my leg and saw she smeared poo all over my work pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 217

You deserved it 3 390

By Anonymous - 06/01/2016 06:54 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I finally got myself settled into bed around 2 in the morning after a very long day. My cat started to snuggle with me when I smelled something disgusting. Turns out my cat sharted in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 130

You deserved it 2 166

By catlover - 16/06/2011 16:14 - China

Today, our new cat, which my mum was hesitant about letting us keep because she believes they're diseased, gave us all ringworm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 196

You deserved it 13 526

The Lovecats

By Anonymous - 30/08/2021 09:01 - United States - Springfield

Today, my cat woke me up by vomiting a big, warm, stinky hairball on my neck and then left. I think she was smiling as she trotted away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 188

The gift

By Anonymous - 15/12/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 171

Precision strike

By Zodiacfall - 27/10/2019 02:00

Today, I replaced my bedsheets with new, clean ones. I went to the bathroom to wash up, and when I came back, my cat had peed exactly where my head would be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 601

You deserved it 239

By xXWhiteSheepXx - 08/04/2016 02:28 - United States - Omaha

Today, my cat likes to share my pillow at night. I guess she was extra comfortable last night, because she didn't bother getting off it to hack up a hairball. I woke up because I rolled my face onto it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 757

You deserved it 2 416

Sobering

By TheLivingDeadTree - 19/10/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I made my way to bed around 4am after spending all night hanging out with my family. When I got to my bed, I started to clear a spot to lay down. Almost immediately, my hand touched something furry and cold and, fearing the worst, I turned the light on. Turns out my cat left me a half eaten rodent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 106

By Noname - 12/03/2009 22:08 - United States

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150 410

You deserved it 22 966

By Anonymous - 05/06/2009 04:28 - United States

Today, I took a nap with a kitten I just adopted from my mom's house. To make her feel more comfortable, I took a nap with her on my bed. In my dream, I kept smelling poo and I felt around on the bed to find the kitten. She apparently had diarrhea on my bed and I had stuck my hand in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 240

You deserved it 8 304

Next

Top comments

Tripartita 44

Monday 1 August 2016 1:01

TWO pets for the price of ONE?! Some people have all the luck!

fitnessgram 19

Monday 1 August 2016 0:56

I don't know what you're definition of a good time is, but I would find that rather romantic. Just you, your cat, and a tapeworm.

Comments

Grand_Genie 14

Tuesday 2 August 2016 1:52

Hey, cats are natural born assholes sometimes

Blurgas 16

Tuesday 2 August 2016 18:41

Was given a cat last christmas. She was all cute and fluffy and loved cuddling up to me. Problem was, she had ringworm on her ears and one of her front legs. By the time treatment cleared it up she was rather less willing to cuddle

Witchylady 17

Wednesday 3 August 2016 4:53

Why on earth is your cat not regularly wormed. YDI. Take care of your cat

Lepisma 38

Wednesday 3 August 2016 22:19

The dewormer that is generally given on a regular basis (usually pyrantel, often administered in combination with heartworm or flea prevention) doesn't affect tapeworms. Tapeworms are usually treated as needed, not monthly like other types. And this is a brand new cat the owner hasn't been taking care of very long. tldr; op isn't necessarily a bad pet parent based on the information given.

Jenadpantano 7

Thursday 4 August 2016 1:41

I'd hope you remember to have your pets de-wormed from now on. Lol. This sucks, but you kind of deserve it for failure to provide care.

K_nightlight 19

Wednesday 7 September 2016 21:10

didnt the cat get a check up before you brought her home? at least tape worms are easily delt with on a mild medication.

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The Top

Today, I yelled at one of my employees for trying to discreetly slip out of a meeting, and demanded he sit up front so I could make sure he stayed for the whole time. Three minutes later, he shat his pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52

You deserved it 984

Today, for my husband's birthday next weekend, I booked a holiday which he was happy about… until I told him it was a surprise family holiday so I'd invited his kids and their families. Now he doesn’t want to go and has made up a fake work emergency. He’s a bus driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 1 243

The Top

Today, I woke up in a guy's bed to one of his cats licking my nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 625

You deserved it 1 064

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a long blowjob and had to pause for a minute because my mouth became exceedingly dry. His solution? Spit directly in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 749

You deserved it 974

Today, I went to see one of my favorite bands. They were having signings, but only the first one hundred could get one. When I finally got to the desk, they said I was number hundred and one, and to get lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 042

You deserved it 4 619

Today, my eye started hurting with unbelievable pain. I couldn't see out of it and I asked my father if he would take me to the hospital, since it was hurting so bad. He said he had to wait for the pizza he ordered for delivery. I had to call a cab to go to the emergency room because of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 533

You deserved it 3 075

Today, I found the source of the bad smell that has been plaguing me for the past two weeks in my apartment. The police knocked on my door asking if I've seen my neighbor recently. I haven't. The smell has been that of a dead person. It's a smell that even Febreze can't remove. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 148

You deserved it 5 201

Today, I caught a grubby, evil-smelling, foul-mouthed woman blatantly shoplifting by stuffing electronics into her coat pockets, so I detained her and called the police. Less than an hour later I was fired. She was the shop owner's mother and “had permission” to just take stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 108