Animals: Today, I made a joke about my electric lawnmower sounding like... - FML

By Beesmakemerun - 10/04/2017 04:00

Today, I made a joke about my electric lawnmower sounding like a bunch of angry bees. It was verified when I ran over a beehive in my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 274

You deserved it 554

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/04/2012 02:25 - United States - Binghamton

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 950

You deserved it 3 440

By Anonymous - 17/10/2012 20:08 - United States - Hobart

Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 144

You deserved it 1 900

By bees - 09/10/2014 06:51 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I was mowing my grandma's lawn when I was suddenly swarmed by bees. When my grandma saw me covered in stings later on, she said, "Oh yeah, there are tons of bees in the grass! Be careful!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 065

You deserved it 2 711

Hiya!

By Jon - 05/05/2009 00:46 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics, I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 539

You deserved it 47 390

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:34 - United States

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 501

You deserved it 62 891

You were warned

By Anonymous - 20/07/2013 21:44 - United States - Austin

Today, I was removing large shrubs from a house. I heard my co-worker yell something, but I couldn't hear him, so I just pulled the stump out anyway. What I realized too late was that he was telling me that there was a swarm of bees living behind the stump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 516

You deserved it 12 019

By random - 13/05/2013 15:06 - United States

Today, I visited my grandparents at their farm. When I went to pee in the outhouse, I noticed a round thing in the middle of the hole, so I peed on it. It was a beehive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 557

You deserved it 23 210

What do I get?

By kirassi919 - 20/09/2012 16:50 - United States - North Wales

Today, I helped my parents out by tearing down the old, rusty swing set that's been in our backyard for years. Little did I know that there was a beehive hidden in the long grass, and I now have dozens of painful red bumps all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 185

You deserved it 2 267

By Rekt - 10/11/2016 05:40 - United States - Federal Way

Today, I was taking a break in my work truck when I saw a huge swarm of bees flying my way. I have a hand crank window so I started cranking it up as fast as I could and the knob snapped off before it closed and I got stung by the whole swarm before I could get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 785

You deserved it 750

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 15:50 - United States

Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weedwacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgetting that I am mowing where the dogs go to the restroom, I absent-mindedly weedwack over dog poop. Which got flung into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 973

You deserved it 26 213

Next

Top comments

PennyLane27 32

Monday 10 April 2017 4:56

Hope you're not the same guy who is allergic to Benadryl!

Dave_Davington 33

Monday 10 April 2017 5:31

You should really bee more careful.

Comments

PennyLane27 32

Monday 10 April 2017 4:56

Hope you're not the same guy who is allergic to Benadryl!

RichardPencil 30

Monday 10 April 2017 5:16

If the mower sounded like angry bees, wouldn't the real bees be scared of them and fly away?

Dave_Davington 33

Monday 10 April 2017 5:31

You should really bee more careful.

Sammeydw 22

Monday 10 April 2017 15:41

She may have been as careful as she could be, we don't know. I have seen bees repurpose old + abandoned rabbit dens , when there were few options available.

MrSassypants 32

Monday 10 April 2017 8:43

This remind me of when Jerry Seinfeld played a bee in a movie about bees. At least this situation was better than that.

PaulieXP 16

Monday 10 April 2017 9:37

Aren't hives supposed to be in trees or somewhere elevated? What was in doing on the ground?

Sammeydw 22

Monday 10 April 2017 15:37

As unusual as it sounds. I have found beehives in bushes, and wasp nests in parts of a house ( lucky always outside ). So not too surprising.

Cali 54

Tuesday 11 April 2017 23:37

AFAIK there are actually "Ground Bees" that burrow and live underground. I am not an entomologist, but I think I remember my mom describing them after I stepped on a hole and got stung as a kid. (shrugs)

TMO2142 25

Monday 10 April 2017 17:12

Hope you are ok and didnt get stung

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The Top

Today, my father had a dream that he'd lost me forever, and the pain was so unbearable, it woke him up. Turns out, the pain he was experiencing was just his bowels and he really needed to take a shit. This is the most affection I've ever received from my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 032

You deserved it 3 461

Today, my parents and I were looking for something using the TV's search bar. Despite never, ever watching anything resembling porn, one of the default search options was, "Hot female Asian sex videos." Thank God they have an excellent sense of humor, as they laughed their heads off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 81

The Top

Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 048

You deserved it 1 962

Today, I had a walk-in: a tiny tick, crawling through my bathroom window, looking down at me in the shower, wondering whether I might be tasty. The window was closed, by the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 651

You deserved it 109

Today, I had to explain to two different educated adults - one with an IT background and one pure maths Master - that dystopian literature is not an accurate historical record of the Middle Ages. Somebody get STEM majors some humanities… FML

I agree, your life sucks 759

You deserved it 165

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 335

You deserved it 5 745

Today, my mom and I made the bad decision to go hiking for some mother-daughter bonding even though we had little experience. My mother tumbled down a mountain named Tumbledown and I couldn't even enjoy the irony because I had to half carry her all the way back to the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 393

You deserved it 3 619

Today, I was with my friend and her entire family at a restaurant. While we were eating, her brother who is really cute asked what "brown sauce" is. I said thats probably 'penis' sauce. I'd meant to say 'peanut sauce' but the damage was done. The entire family just stared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 957

You deserved it 24 284