Love: Today, I met a girl at the bar. Things were going really well...

By Anonymous - 19/12/2009 05:13 - United States

Today, I met a girl at the bar. Things were going really well and we ended up going back to her place. Problem? Her husband who normally works the graveyard shift was home sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 880

You deserved it 11 718

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Explain yourself

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 232

You deserved it 4 591

By Anonymous - 01/09/2009 15:09 - United States

Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 577

You deserved it 69 630

By Jebus - 23/01/2009 13:31 - Canada

Today, I finally went on a date with the girl I'm in love with. After dinner we went to the bar for drinks and things were going great. Right up until she went home with another guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 801

You deserved it 2 428

By Anonymous - 27/08/2011 16:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to a bar with some friends when my wife texted me asking where I was. Not wanting her to know I was at a bar, I told her I was still at work. She was sitting in the booth behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 567

You deserved it 67 657

By Jebus - 24/01/2009 16:07 - Canada

Today, I brought a girl home from the bar. After sleeping together, she drunkenly stumbles to the bathroom to wash up. On her way back, she accidentally walks into my parents' room, turns on the lights and asks where her clothes are before figuring it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 117

You deserved it 34 791

By Anonymous - 25/05/2021 00:01

Today, I took a girl out on a date. We had dinner, we had good conversation, the vibe was excellent, and everything was great. I took her to a bar I frequent after for a couple of drinks to finish the night. She left with some other dude on his motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 137

You deserved it 128

Fancy seeing you here

By mustanggt - 14/04/2022 19:00 - United States - Carlsbad

Today, I met my girlfriend's husband for the first time. It went surprisingly well, despite neither of us knowing the other existed before tonight, but it's still a miserable situation no matter what. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 099

You deserved it 118

Set the scene

By NJ. - 24/01/2009 10:41 - United States

Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 236

You deserved it 2 449

Party hard

By vcarder - 04/10/2013 20:25 - United States - Newton

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 978

You deserved it 43 183

By bmonehh - 24/11/2009 20:20 - United States

Today, I met my wife's other husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 455

You deserved it 3 499

xKoga 0

Saturday 19 December 2009 13:38

YDI for trying to get a quick one night stand, I highly doubt you were there for cookies and milk. If she isn't happy with her marriage she should step up and get a divorce, and not be a cheating *****.

tipoo_fml 0

Sunday 20 December 2009 23:17

YDI if you knew she was married, your life sucks if you didn't.

Comments

wow2much 0

Monday 21 December 2009 0:19

haha, when you die hes gonna unbury you and feed you to the dogs... YDI douche bag

driedpeaches 0

Monday 21 December 2009 0:24

you do know that the "graveyard" shift doesn't mean he works in a grave yard don't you ? ******* retard

wow2much 0

Monday 21 December 2009 0:38

i dont care, hes still a douche bag

RMC000 7

Monday 21 December 2009 3:53

YTDI for fooling about with a married woman. Should've asked that first.

mekeskidi_fml 0

Monday 21 December 2009 14:42

I guess the OP went to her place because HIS wife was at home.

phantombrother 4

Monday 21 December 2009 16:35

I guess since he was sick you didn't go with the 3-way?

Suckazgetburned 0

Friday 1 January 2010 7:38

That is really gay! If your husband/wife was sick would you wear a ring out to a bar.... trying to pick up someone? That is the most ridiculous thing ive ever heard! when people cheat they dont wanna get caught dumbass