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I was adopted and I hate my birth mother. So I don't blame him.
I'm sorry you had that experience, but sometimes as parents we don't have any other option, and everybody's situations are different. My daughters father cheated, got another woman pregnant, and so he left me for her while I was pregnant with our child. I didn't have the means to raise her, and he wasn't grown up enough to be a father so adoption was the only way to go for my situation. If I could have given her what she needed, I wouldn't have gone that route, but i couldn't. I love her with all my heart, more and more every day, but i haven't seen her in a very long time. Sometimes it's the only option we have. It was one of the hardest things I have ever been through, but I know she has a better life than what I could have given her. Try and think of it in that light. I don't know what kind of bio mom you had, but look at the parents you have compared. I'm sure they were a better option, and even if she's a terrible person, (I don't know the case) she gave you what she could, better parents. It might be the only good thing she did, but when you're down about it, try to remember that. Keep your head up Hun, i know it's got to be tough but things get better. Best of luck to you.
he shouldn't have. I mean after 20 years he should be happy as hell you're doing him that favor and appeared in his life. you ******* gave him up for adoption! what did u think u would get? a thank-you note? many people go through shit just to raise up their kids. u left him for 20 years u should've expected this.
Look the kid can be angry or whatever, but you all need to realize; OP's situation may have called for it so that the kid could have a chance at a better life.
but you didn't think of meeting him before? FHL more like
There are laws staring you sadly can't meet with your child until they are at least 21 if it's a closed adoption. That's when the child has access to their files and your information as the bio parent.
Think there's far too many YDIs on here.
I applaud you, it's really tough to do what you did. I sadly had to give a child up for adoption knowing that she would have a better life, and myself not agreeing with abortion. To each their own, but for me that's the case. I hope my daughter will be willing to meet me in the next 19 yrs. you're very brave for what you did, and you all need to stop being so insensitive. Sometimes there just isn't any other option. Keep your head up, maybe he'll come around.
It's ok OP. I'm so sorry your son reacted that way, but I believe you did the right thing. Personally I've always wanted to meet my birth parents, and would never consider them wanting to meet me an intrusion on my life. There's a biological connection, and I'd expect they'd want to see if adoption was really the way to go. And in my case, I can definitely say it was. I have such a better life now than I would have with my birth parents, but I know that's only possible because they loved me enough to want what's best for me. Anyways, sorry for the rant, although I doubt many people will see this considering I'm commenting 3 years after the fact. I hope things worked out for you.
I don't understand why there are so many YDIs. You guys have no idea why OP put him up for adoption. You guys are acting like OP just did it because they were bored and was like "eh im bored im gonna put billy up for adoption" it could've been something like OP couldn't afford to take care of their child so they figured they'd put him up for adoption so he can go to a family that could afford it. Please think of all the possibilities before you jump to a conclusion.
Keywords
Talk about a soap opera in the making.
You're right, he should've left him in a dumpster.