Transportation, Dogs and Cars: Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing... - FML

By hakura madada - 22/06/2012 19:41 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 253

You deserved it 27 623

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Same thing different taste

Road rage

By fUcKOAHdSAjl - 16/08/2013 18:41 - United States - Manchester

Today, my dog was riding my car's passenger seat. He clambered over onto my lap, causing me to lose control of the wheel for a few seconds. As I tried to knock him off me, I lost track of my speed, and ended up being pulled over for reckless driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 518

You deserved it 44 705

By fufu_mutt - 15/12/2010 04:24 - United States

Today, I was driving with my dog. Looking out the half-open window he stepped on the switch, the window went up, causing his head to get stuck. I looked down and he had scared the shit out of himself, all over my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 762

You deserved it 10 174

By ConfusedGinger - 10/11/2016 11:50 - United States - Downingtown

Today, my dog pooped. In my lap. While I was driving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 877

You deserved it 2 302

By ej6901 - 23/06/2015 20:00 - United States - Ventnor City

Today, I left my dog in my car for 5 minutes while I ran into a store. The car was running so he was fine, the thing that wasn't so fine is that when I walked out my car wasn't there. My dog somehow moved my car into the middle of a intersection, almost causing an accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 813

You deserved it 19 140

By Anonymous - 09/03/2011 09:52 - India

Today, while stuck in a traffic jam, my son silently changed my gear to reverse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 925

You deserved it 7 130

Bad boy

By VtecKickIn - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was driving home with my girlfriend. As we turned onto our block, she shrieked that our dog was running down the street and into traffic. I jumped out of the moving car and chased him for about a mile, only to give up, go home, and find out it wasn't our dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 216

You deserved it 5 801

Magic moment

By spongebob squarepants - 28/02/2018 01:30

Today, I rear-ended someone while trying to watch my odometer hit 80,000 miles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 589

You deserved it 7 396

Road rage

By notapetkiller - 26/07/2016 06:12 - United States - New Hyde Park

Today, while in the car with my mom, we accidentally ran over a dog who had sprinted into the road. Instead of stopping, my mom continued to drive as if nothing happened. Every time I tried to bring it up, she merely talked loudly over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 994

You deserved it 1 631

By vstan - 25/08/2010 00:48 - United States

Today, I swerved off the road and hit a tree in order to avoid hitting a dog that came out of nowhere. Don't worry, I didn't hit him. The person behind me did, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 481

You deserved it 5 119

Murderer!

By Puppy_Killer - 16/12/2020 23:02 - Australia

Today, I was backing out of my garage when my neighbour's collie ran behind my car. Unfortunately, I didn't see it, but I heard a thump. They were out, so I rushed him to the vet's. I was upset, and I guess I was driving too fast and didn't see that another dog was crossing the road. I killed two dogs today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 469

You deserved it 448

Next

Top comments

drewnewton 0

Saturday 23 June 2012 2:48

not much of an fml for you as for it is the dog

nelds 12

Saturday 23 June 2012 2:47

Poor puppy :( :(

Comments

lilicoco_fml 5

Saturday 23 June 2012 4:51

I cover people like you, who think they're badass and invincible, with sheets all the time. Save your family, or at least other families, from having to plan an early funeral. Speed limits are set for a reason. And if you mistaken your dog's head for the gear shift, you most definitely NOT a professional driver. Hope you realize that your life is worth more than going fast and looking cool, and if you don't care about your own, care about the family that you could kill coming home from the grocery store, a mother trying to get home to her children, a father coming home to his pregnant wife/newborn child. Hope you seriously think about it OP..

SanaSazi 32

Saturday 23 June 2012 4:53

Can't go wrong with an automatic

cawoods 1

Saturday 23 June 2012 4:59

You my friend. Are a terrible person...

winnerme123 8

Saturday 23 June 2012 5:19

The dog is not op's best friend now. But it is probably still mans best friend.

j_cat187 19

Saturday 23 June 2012 5:24

121 mph, 5000 rpm, shift to 5th, arf...

KayleeT 9

Saturday 23 June 2012 5:31

How the hell do you even manage to do that?

jess183xp 1

Saturday 23 June 2012 5:35

You are not fit to look after an animal you asshole! If I saw you in the street I'd bloody well come rip ya head off ya ******* ****!

mustang95 7

Saturday 23 June 2012 5:37

Dogs should have to be restrained when they are in cars all it takes is someone with a stupid dog running around in the car when they have to slam on the brakes and their dog goes into the floor hits the gas and kills someone. It should be illegal to let dogs or any animal for that matter ride unrestrained in a motor vehicle.

Bassist5798 0

Saturday 23 June 2012 5:50

dick! slow down your putting your dogs life in danger!

TxCountryBeauty 10

Saturday 23 June 2012 6:20

Omg! My Pomeranian would sit on the floor board of the front seat or be in her seat belt... One time we were driving n she wanted to get close to me she got on my gear shift n knocked it into manual (I have dual transmission)... I stalled out my car:( lol now I can laugh but then I was upset

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The Top

Today, an absolute cretin of a lorry driver ran into the back of me as I was slowing down for an orange light about to go red. My car is totalled and he had the nerve to tell the police I had brake checked him on purpose, probably for an insurance scam, and that it was all my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 63

Today, after six months of doing the job of 2 people, because all my coworker does is sleep and sit down with her phone, I told my boss that I can't be doing my coworker's job and getting the same salary as her. My boss added just $10 to my salary and told me to let her carry on doing nothing, while I still do the work of 2 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 131

The Top

Today, I bought a massive new puzzle to take my mind off of things. Hours later, I realized there was a missing piece. Frustrated, I looked everywhere for it, only to discover it was stuck to the bottom of my shoe, and I'd been walking around with it all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 139

Today, I spent about 10 minutes searching frantically for my cell phone, while holding it up to my ear and talking to my friend about my plans tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 837

You deserved it 42 164

Today, I got yelled at by my mother for making noise after midnight. What was the noise? The microwave as I made something to eat. I work the night shift and had just come home from work, and I'm the only person in this house with a job. Apparently, me not paying her overdue bills cancels that out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 540

You deserved it 93

Today, my dog thought it would be a good idea to use my phone as a chew toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 402

You deserved it 685

Today, I had to catch a bus to work, as my car had to be taken in yesterday. The bad drivers always upset my stomach with their instant stop/start driving style. I felt a burp coming on, but it turned out to be projectile vomit that filled my mask right up and poured down my shirt and pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 224

You deserved it 206

Today, I needed to pee at my friend's house. His bathroom door is often left closed even if there's no one in there, so I knocked just to make sure. His stepdad opened the door stark naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 956

You deserved it 2 799