Animals: Today, I realized that the only one willing to hang out with... - FML

By bored2death - 23/07/2010 22:15 - United States

Today, I realized that the only one willing to hang out with me this summer is my guinea pig. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 257

You deserved it 6 220

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Same thing different taste

By HelpMe - 25/02/2014 09:59 - United Kingdom - Galashiels

Today, my mum asked me how the guinea pig was doing. We don't have a guinea pig. Turns out she had volunteered me to look after the next door neighbor's guinea pig when they were away and 'forgot' to tell me. They have been gone two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 991

You deserved it 3 848

By Beeisc00l - 05/10/2011 18:58 - Reserved

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 615

You deserved it 22 521

By pigglepigglepiggle - 24/11/2009 02:30 - United States

Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 522

You deserved it 29 604

By Anonymous - 21/02/2016 21:48 - United States - Merrimack

Today, I found out that my friends only hang out with me so they can play with my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 769

You deserved it 2 426

What a cozy moment

By ratfaced - 12/10/2017 07:00 - United States - Stamford

Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 729

You deserved it 382

By animallover - 26/06/2011 05:39 - United States

Today, I found out that my beloved guinea pig has impaction. For the rest of his life it will be my duty to clean out his rectum manually every month, or every week/day if it gets worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 577

You deserved it 5 302

By Anonymous - 02/12/2009 19:25 - United States

Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 879

You deserved it 7 341

By LG - 17/03/2010 04:18 - United States

Today, I found out that I will be spending my spring break alone because my family is going to France. I can't go with them nor go with any of my friends because I have to take care of the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 664

You deserved it 4 145

By Anonymous - 19/12/2010 20:51 - United States

Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 126

You deserved it 7 199

By Anonymous - 03/09/2011 02:47 - United States

Today, my school is having their homecoming, and it seems everyone but me has someone to go with. My best friend has her boyfriend, my brother has a date, and I have my hamster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 373

You deserved it 6 880

Next

Top comments

justsayfuck 5

Saturday 24 July 2010 1:58

You liar! You forced him :o

ibmike22 13

Saturday 24 July 2010 2:01

i wish i had a guinea pig:( oh well, the only friend i need is my fridge

Comments

nxlcorey 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:16

what's wrong with dogs as it pick

randomlettrrs 8

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:22

33 whats up?

waltjrimmer 6

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:27

You're lucky. You at least have the hamster to keep you company. I just have... a useless computer. You smug son of a ferret....

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Saturday 24 July 2010 19:47

Ferrets are awesome. OP, my ferrets will kick your guinea pig's ass!

gypsyblue 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:34

What's with all these FMLs with the "Today I realized I'm so lonely" formula? It's getting really, really, really old. Of course you're lonely, you're on FML. So spare the details.

imhowie 2

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:36

And the guinea pig probably only does because it doesn't know any different.

isteadymob 4

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:49

it doesn't want to hang out with it's stuck in it's cage in your room

That_Guy_Jake_JR 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:51

I'll chill with you OP, I have no friends either :(

saucey12 1

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:52

r u sure... the guinea pig unfortunately doesn't have a choice. unless you leave the cage door open then you will really know the truth

FYL_hardd 0

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:53

36 - No, it is not "dog racism". I wouldn't know how the company is with two big dogs, or two small dogs because as I specifically indicated, I have ONE BIG dog, and ONE SMALL dog. Geez, people that pick fights for stupidity these days.

lotsologan 2

Saturday 24 July 2010 4:56

haha oh how I love people with no lives. reminds me of myself a few summers ago...

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Today, I came out as lesbian and introduced my new girlfriend to my family. My mom angrily told me that I should have waited until my grandparents had died before coming out, and that I was "extremely disrespectful" for making this announcement. I honestly thought everyone would be fine with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 096

You deserved it 1 169

You’re probably wondering what this website is all about. Well, it’s basically a bunch of people who had enough humor to tell you all about their shitty lives, and what it was that made their day suck a big fat one. Some are sad in funny way, som...

I agree, your life sucks 14

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The Top

Today, my husband refuses to have sex with me until I get my tubes tied. We both agree that we don't want children, but this seems to be an exaggerated reaction since he learned that most birth controls are not 100% effective. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 266

You deserved it 277

Today, my girlfriend has such a bad ear infection that she's leaking yellow pus, but she still refuses antibiotics, calling them "white man's poison" and insisting that "indigenous healing" will cure her. This translates to listening to drum music and dancing, then vomiting everywhere because her balance is fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 179

Today, I was fired for not attending a mandatory meeting. I confronted my boss and told her I never heard anything about it, she told me that daily reminders had been sent out via email for weeks. She then discovered that she failed to enter my email address in the system. I was still fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 322

You deserved it 2 815

Today, I thought I'd save some money by doing my own electrical work. When I turned the power back on, it caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 850

You deserved it 18 318

Today, I was breast feeding my son. Out of nowhere, he bit my nipple hard, causing me to scream in pain. He giggled with my nipple still between his teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 288

You deserved it 7 250

Today, I was mugged at gunpoint by a senior citizen. She now has a lousy $20, and I probably have PTSD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 486

You deserved it 2 722