Love: Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt...

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By Anonymous - 25/11/2011 03:51 - United States

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 200

You deserved it 51 065

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Same thing different taste

By mustache girl - 27/05/2013 23:10 - Canada - Magog

Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 116

You deserved it 6 065

By Anonymous - 12/02/2017 08:00 - United States - Princeton

Today, my husband caught me scratching my armpit with his beard brush. Just last week I swore that I never touch it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 452

You deserved it 12 366

By Anonymous - 08/02/2010 06:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 765

You deserved it 8 994

By altocrm - 24/10/2010 04:11 - France

Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 347

You deserved it 4 242

Multiusage

By Anonymous - 06/11/2021 05:00 - Poland - Poznan

Today, I noticed my girlfriend wiping her sweaty armpits with the small towel that I always use to wipe my face with after shaving. Now I know why the towel smells so bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 104

You deserved it 187

By Anonymous - 08/03/2010 14:35 - United States

Today, I have a rash all over my face because yesterday my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, I am allergic to the something in the tissues with which I was blowing my nose and wiping away my tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 666

You deserved it 3 012

Twins

By Anon - 27/05/2023 22:00

Today, my phone thought my armpit was my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 578

You deserved it 202

By Jasmine - 10/10/2014 05:52 - United States - Sacramento

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I noticed he looked uncomfortable. When I asked what was wrong, he asked when the last time I shaved was. I answered, "I shaved my legs this morning." He shook his head and said, "No, I meant your face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 899

You deserved it 6 124

By Anonymous - 19/01/2013 16:50 - United Kingdom - Nuneaton

Today, after recently breaking up with my boyfriend, I unknowingly washed my laundry using his washing tabs. My whole wardrobe now smells like my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 008

You deserved it 16 980

Creepy guy

By GOAWAY - 26/12/2014 23:06 - United States - Jefferson City

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend at the store. Before I knew what was happening, he'd sniffed me and started whimpering about how I don't smell like I used to. He does this kind of crazy shit all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 927

You deserved it 3 469

QuisMysterium 4

Friday 25 November 2011 8:53

-forever alone-

detective_oreo 0

Friday 25 November 2011 8:54

Thank god you can't rub your face in your ******!

Comments

Orangejuicebaby 4

Sunday 27 November 2011 7:00

Why would you even have armpit stubble in the first place? Are you that depressed...you forget to shave?

funnydayz 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 18:41

1. Time to move on 2. Get a life 3. That's kinda gross.

AJG2222 0

Sunday 27 November 2011 22:51

Dude you have issues

gambit021 2

Monday 28 November 2011 0:35

and that's because you fail at life

alfalfalaffa 17

Monday 28 November 2011 1:54

ewwww.

flamminbunny 2

Monday 28 November 2011 2:52

thats gross...why would u wana tell people u did that..

breakingdawn25 0

Monday 28 November 2011 3:25

That's not even possible

jayer_hooo 0

Monday 28 November 2011 6:50

That is sick and wrong

tcxox 0

Monday 28 November 2011 7:11

Omg lol wtf

emilyemillyy 0

Monday 28 November 2011 9:33

Is this FML pity for you or your ex...

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Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "Uh-huh," "Not too bad," and "Yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 233

You deserved it 7 267

Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 466

The Top

Today, I was in bed feeling sad and depressed because I hate my career and several major life choices I made for the wrong reasons. My husband, who had been trying to cheer me up all day, put the icing on the cake by saying, “Is this a bad time to mention the blowjob you promised me yesterday?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 574

You deserved it 313

Today, my boyfriend diagnosed me with scoliosis. During doggystyle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 89

Today, I was in a rush to meet some friends for brunch, and I arrived first. The restaurant door was locked, so I knocked. A waiter opened the door and stared at me with confusion before saying, “This isn’t the entrance, ma’am.” It wasn’t until I walked around the corner and saw the correct door that I realized I had been standing at the employee entrance the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 430

Today, while driving to a client's home, I received a text. Since I loathe those who text and drive, I pulled into a convenience store's parking lot. While I was texting, a car sped into the lot, rear-ending my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 349

You deserved it 1 145

Today, my boyfriend of eight happy months suddenly broke up with me via text. He'd always insisted that texts were too impersonal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 141

Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, she asked me to whisper her name. Apparently, her name isn't Kate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 778

You deserved it 79 209

Same thing different taste

Multiusage

Twins

Creepy guy

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