Love: Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt...

By Anonymous - 25/11/2011 03:51 - United States

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 197

You deserved it 51 061

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Same thing different taste

By mustache girl - 27/05/2013 23:10 - Canada - Magog

Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 110

You deserved it 6 062

By Anonymous - 12/02/2017 08:00 - United States - Princeton

Today, my husband caught me scratching my armpit with his beard brush. Just last week I swore that I never touch it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 452

You deserved it 12 343

By Anonymous - 08/02/2010 06:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 761

You deserved it 8 989

By altocrm - 24/10/2010 04:11 - France

Today, my girlfriend came over to me, like she was going to kiss me, and instead rubbed her chin all over my face, exclaiming, "Can you feel my beard coming in?" Yes, yes I could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 341

You deserved it 4 237

Multiusage

By Anonymous - 06/11/2021 05:00 - Poland - Poznan

Today, I noticed my girlfriend wiping her sweaty armpits with the small towel that I always use to wipe my face with after shaving. Now I know why the towel smells so bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 091

You deserved it 186

By Anonymous - 08/03/2010 14:35 - United States

Today, I have a rash all over my face because yesterday my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, I am allergic to the something in the tissues with which I was blowing my nose and wiping away my tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 660

You deserved it 3 007

Twins

By Anon - 27/05/2023 22:00

Today, my phone thought my armpit was my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 200

By Jasmine - 10/10/2014 05:52 - United States - Sacramento

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I noticed he looked uncomfortable. When I asked what was wrong, he asked when the last time I shaved was. I answered, "I shaved my legs this morning." He shook his head and said, "No, I meant your face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 895

You deserved it 6 120

By Anonymous - 19/01/2013 16:50 - United Kingdom - Nuneaton

Today, after recently breaking up with my boyfriend, I unknowingly washed my laundry using his washing tabs. My whole wardrobe now smells like my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 001

You deserved it 16 978

Creepy guy

By GOAWAY - 26/12/2014 23:06 - United States - Jefferson City

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend at the store. Before I knew what was happening, he'd sniffed me and started whimpering about how I don't smell like I used to. He does this kind of crazy shit all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 917

You deserved it 3 469

QuisMysterium 4

Friday 25 November 2011 8:53

-forever alone-

detective_oreo 0

Friday 25 November 2011 8:54

Thank god you can't rub your face in your ******!

Comments

namie123 0

Tuesday 29 November 2011 1:43

How?.....

namie123 0

Tuesday 29 November 2011 1:45

How?.....

nabs_fml 5

Tuesday 29 November 2011 2:21

That's disgusting get help!!

custardpuddinpie 4

Tuesday 29 November 2011 3:08

Today, I read this FML and promptly lifted my arm and attempted to shove my face in my armpit. FML

brina53 4

Tuesday 29 November 2011 16:12

hmm... I'm at a loss for reasons he would ever leave u.. ::sarcasm::

ty1992_farmlife 12

Tuesday 29 November 2011 17:26

232- yeah its gross but some people do weird stuff like that

khrist 0

Wednesday 30 November 2011 6:24

that's not an FML, that's just nasty

4realz226 0

Thursday 1 December 2011 23:48

Its called self respect. Get some. :/

katiekarnif 9

Friday 2 December 2011 22:51

you need a new boyfriend lovely

KaThRyN123456789 0

Sunday 4 December 2011 22:01

Uh.... GROSS!!

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The Top

Today, while I was mid-act with my girlfriend, my mom unlocked my bedroom door and came in shaking maracas. She then handed them to my very shocked girlfriend and told her these were the "Busted maracas" and directed her to pass them along accordingly. Well, at least our first time was memorable… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 441

You deserved it 365

Today, it's only day three of my annual vacation. Rest and relaxation? Afraid not! For the past days, I've been haunted by the constant thought of how much work will be piled up when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 375

You deserved it 139

The Top

Today, my uncle kept his promise and left me his holiday house in his will. What he didn’t tell me was it’s been unmaintained for 14 years and is unfit for human habitation, has 2 mortgages, and now it and all its issues are now mine. Old, dead bastard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 824

You deserved it 353

Today, I tested the new taps in the shower, with my head. Yep, they're strong enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 619

You deserved it 25 832

Today, I still haven’t consummated my marriage with my new wife. She said no sex before marriage and I obliged for 2 long years. During our honeymoon, she kept making up excuses. Now when I sit down and talk to her, she calls me a “horny pervert” and accuses me of “using her for sex” and stormed off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 817

You deserved it 525

Today, my dad wants me to spray a wasp nest, because I'm the fittest family member and can run the fastest. The wasps are already angry, and I'm allergic to them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 852

You deserved it 1 857

Today, I found out that my landlord is sleeping with my girlfriend, and he won’t let me out of my lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 506

You deserved it 159

Today, I found out the guy I've been pursuing for six months doesn't date people in recovery. That's literally how we met. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 341

Same thing different taste

Multiusage

Twins

Creepy guy

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