Health: Today, I shat out a staple. FML

By wtf - 09/06/2011 15:04 - United Kingdom

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 618

You deserved it 17 977

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Same thing different taste

By mimi - 27/09/2011 02:51 - United States

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 682

You deserved it 35 753

By 41k312 - 01/11/2016 05:03

Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 745

You deserved it 3 630

By leprechaun23 - 23/04/2012 04:21 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I taught my friend how to use a staple gun. She taught me how to get staples out of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 296

You deserved it 4 317

By Staples - 15/05/2010 06:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally stapled my finger to a piece of paper. It hurt, but I took it out and went to restaple it. I did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 274

You deserved it 49 089

By SenorPoopypants - 08/01/2017 19:23

Today, I shat myself during a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 667

You deserved it 992

By sadface - 04/01/2010 06:43 - Australia

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 488

You deserved it 7 421

Self-own

By Anonymous - 20/01/2021 08:01

Today, out of nowhere, I started violently choking on my own saliva and shat myself in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 052

You deserved it 136

Jeremy?

By Anonymous - 20/04/2022 22:00

Today, I shat myself in the middle of Walmart. It dripped out the bottom of my pants till i made it to the restroom, which was on the other side of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 125

You deserved it 266

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By TuteBananaCupcake - 29/12/2023 14:00 - United States - Dayton

Today, I used the last of the toilet paper to blow my nose while taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 571

By Maddie - 22/03/2011 15:39

Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 492

You deserved it 12 939

rockerbaby3192 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 18:45

why did you eat one

BShady96 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 19:31

this fml was so short i had trouble opening it on my iphone -.-

Comments

aardvarkish 15

Thursday 9 June 2011 22:47

That's worth a diary entry... (All I ever find is nickles, dimes, and carpet fuzz.)

OceanBreathesSal 5

Thursday 9 June 2011 22:49

28 I really want to thumbs up your comment but how can I ruin a perfectly good number of 69 votes?

a_wiener_d0g 15

Thursday 9 June 2011 22:52

you shouldn't have eaten my homework >:(

283leis 8

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:04

how did u know? do u like look at ur shit after going? if so ydi.

pokemongray 2

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:09

According to my odd friend, looking at your shit is healthy... o.O Maybe they were doing a health check. XD

Sophail 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:08

say whaaat

GeneralMotors 23

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:11

this is the shortest FML ever.

Crazy4Christ 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:15

ummm... why?

10glitch01 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:27

no pun intended!

richcranium 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:28

that can easily be avoided if you stop eating staples retard

WordSmyth 2

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:30

It's about time you got your shit together.

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Sleep Work Dating Love Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Video games Gamers Ironic Zoom

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Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 747

You deserved it 17 915

Stop everything you're doing right now, there's an (almost) naked lady in today's illustration! Plus, there's a puppet AND doctors. It's the perfect illustration, made by Gemma Correll, our British artist of the day. Check out her interview! ...

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You deserved it 9

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 57 694

You deserved it 5 204

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I agree, your life sucks 3 126

You deserved it 3 359

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I agree, your life sucks 4 298

You deserved it 724

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I agree, your life sucks 40 186

You deserved it 2 424

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I agree, your life sucks 1 355

You deserved it 257

Watch me!

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 74

Same thing different taste

Self-own

Jeremy?

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