Intimacy: Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to...

By involuntary waxing - 15/01/2012 09:00 - Canada

Today, I started a new medication, not paying much notice to the one side effect: "unusual vaginal secretions". They're unusual alright, they glued my underwear to my skin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 095

You deserved it 4 322

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Same thing different taste

Jammed

By stinky car - 16/08/2013 03:18 - United States - Bessemer

Today, I went on a new medicine. One of the listed side-effects was "anal seepage" and I spent the better part of the day laughing with my coworkers about how it's "not a real side-effect". I found out that it really is while stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 046

You deserved it 10 450

By darthinvader - 16/07/2010 00:17 - United States

Today, I took some new allergy medicine I had never tried before, and I didn't bother reading the side effects. I then went to school. It was almost an hour before dismissal when I had felt a warm feeling on my legs. One of the side effects to my new medicine was bladder control problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 048

You deserved it 27 686

Crispy

By ouch - 20/12/2011 12:46 - Australia

Today, I'm on a medication that really dehydrates my skin. I thought split lips were the worst side effects. Other split orifices make a trip to the toilet a literal pain in the arse. No sign of stopping in the near future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 672

You deserved it 2 432

By Anonymous - 30/09/2010 13:25 - United States

Today, I was given new meds, and apparently my body doesn't understand the difference between "may cause stomach upset" and "you will crap yourself as you have an orgasm while having sex with your boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 137

You deserved it 5 479

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 029

You deserved it 2 796

What new hell is this

By full bladder - 28/04/2015 22:39 - United States - Valrico

Today, I found out my anti-depressants are super-effective. So effective, they affect things they aren't even supposed to. Like my ability to pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 945

You deserved it 2 370

By NotSoSick - 12/02/2010 05:11 - United States

Today, my doctor put me on some extra strength antibiotics for an infection. On the label it says "WARNING: may cause Diarrhea"... 'may cause' is a funny term... this is the second time I've sharted in my pants today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 510

You deserved it 3 869

Supportive

By Khagen - 27/01/2021 05:01

Today, after two rounds of antibiotics, I got a yeast infection. My husband started calling me "Yeasty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 698

You deserved it 109

By It burns down there - 11/12/2018 17:30

Today, I used a new fragrance-free hypoallergenic laundry detergent for my underwear, as I have sensitive skin. I got a rash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 106

You deserved it 237

By Anonymous - 28/01/2019 12:00 - United States - Arcade

Today, I woke up with a horrible UTI after having sex with my fiance the night before. I went to an urgent care to get antibiotics as my primary is closed. Turns out, I'm allergic to condom lubricant. Now everytime I pee, It not only burns, but smells like a nasty condom... FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 503

You deserved it 216

cartmen73 0

Sunday 15 January 2012 16:39

Yikes! Don't get glued to a partner!

ICATiger 13

Sunday 15 January 2012 16:44

That's a sticky situation

Comments

Cheesecakee 11

Monday 16 January 2012 2:01

Thats ******* sick.

LittleBritt 0

Monday 16 January 2012 2:55

What's actually the most unusual thing about these vaginal secretions, is that OP is a guy!

hguzman904 0

Monday 16 January 2012 2:59

that is nasyy.. i wouldn't wanna be caught in that!!!!

Akharr01 5

Monday 16 January 2012 3:01

That would be good revenge

dirtysellers85 0

Monday 16 January 2012 3:11

I'd eat it

yummcookie 0

Monday 16 January 2012 5:23

Bottle it & sell it as natural glue!

Omgitsveronica 4

Monday 16 January 2012 5:38

Did you hear that? it's the sound of dads everywhere sighing with relief at the fact that this is scientifically possible.

alfalfa101 0

Monday 16 January 2012 6:23

Atleast your ****** gets a nice waxing...

LondonAbby 3

Monday 16 January 2012 6:55

change FML to TMI and then feel free to post nasty sticky va-jay-jay stories... I could have done without that bit of information... o.0

rudikk99 2

Monday 16 January 2012 7:12

Just lovely!!

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The Top

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Today, I was just told by a hiring manager that the reasons I'm not getting interviews is because I have a spotty work history. My work history is spotty because my mother ignores my food allergies so she can get attention and, as a result, I'm chronically ill. FML

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The Top

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You deserved it 625

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You deserved it 2 201

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I agree, your life sucks 676

You deserved it 77

Today, I had an endoscopy and nothing wrong was found. So why have I been vomiting up everything, including water, for the past 10 days? FML

I agree, your life sucks 793

You deserved it 79

Today, I found out that other than having to deal with cramps, headaches, PMS, PMDD, and all the other crap that comes along with periods, that it's also not uncommon to have painful gas during that time. 5 days left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 106

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 237

You deserved it 4 309