Intimacy: Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a...

By Anonymous - 30/01/2014 00:52 - United States - Ithaca

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 380

You deserved it 23 655

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Same thing different taste

Sitcom vibes

By Anonymous - 16/11/2013 19:31 - France - Paris

Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 403

You deserved it 48 876

By heyhijello - 09/09/2013 22:05 - United States - Oakland

Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 079

You deserved it 12 728

By Becca - 31/01/2010 05:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months asked me to spend the night at his apartment for the first time. I had to poop really bad when I got there, so I used his only bathroom. He went after me, and came out a few seconds later, gagging. Apparently, I clogged his toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 077

You deserved it 7 042

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 14:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 291

You deserved it 30 221

Confinement, episode 3774

By S3XY_SiNG3R - 11/04/2020 02:00

Today, I woke up to use the restroom, because I had to take a shit. There was basically no toilet paper left. I asked my boyfriend if he could go get some. It was 1 a.m. He said he’d go when the stores were open, then told me to just rinse off in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 2 068

By thanksmom - 09/01/2013 19:57 - United States - Tucson

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 656

You deserved it 7 793

By whatchagonnado - 24/03/2013 07:35 - Canada - Victoria

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 956

You deserved it 8 898

Weren't there two girls?

By Megan - 19/03/2018 01:30

Today, I was at my boyfriend's in a back room that wasn’t connected to the main house. I really had to pee, but neither of us wanted to go into the house, so he told me to just go outside in a cup. I ended up having diarrhea in a cup in my boyfriend's backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 359

You deserved it 4 613

By ItWasOurAnniversary - 28/09/2016 12:08 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I wanted to kayak. On the way, I told him I had to go back to our hotel because I needed the bathroom and didn't want a public one to smell. Once back in the elevator at the hotel, it got stuck. For an hour. I pooped myself and had to wait 40 minutes after that for help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 410

You deserved it 2 502

Joe Bidet

By tmrwsmggls - 16/11/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 351

audreyfml1994 15

Thursday 30 January 2014 10:59

He probably would've stopped his shower for a minute so you could use the toilet. I know it may be embarrassing, especially with him being a new bf and all, but seriously? ******** in a bag?

iLike2Teabag 27

Thursday 30 January 2014 11:16

It's not that nasty. Everyone knows that when girls poop, glitter and pink fairy dust and a rainbow comes out. Right..?

Comments

jmacfan1 16

Thursday 30 January 2014 19:52

For all you guys saying she could have gone in a bush it is winter here in the US and with temps below freezing and subzero wind chills it is way too ******* cold outside to poo in a bush

NightHawk387 22

Thursday 30 January 2014 19:56

It could be worse, OP. I once saw a couple on TV telling a story about their first date. They were going on a ski trip, and the woman had to pee, but they were nowhere near a restroom, so she had to pee on the side of the road. She leaned against the car bumper while she was peeing, and because it was so cold, her skin got stuck to the car. So the only safe way to get her unstuck without hurting her was for the man to pee on her to release her skin from the car. Now that is an awkward first date. They ended up getting married too.

GEBEH 14

Friday 31 January 2014 13:30

if it was so cold wouldn't she have clothes on which would prevent her skin from getting stuck?

n3ophyt3 10

Thursday 30 January 2014 20:10

FML that I have read this .

Plastic_Stitchez 25

Thursday 30 January 2014 21:17

Totally agree with you man

0310Park 1

Thursday 30 January 2014 20:10

hahahahaha i cant breath!!

decwalsh4 5

Thursday 30 January 2014 20:16

what the **** go somewhere else

0310Park 1

Thursday 30 January 2014 20:18

OMG!!! hahahaha i cant breath!!

mia_marie01 11

Thursday 30 January 2014 20:19

Was there just not a restaurant or store or anything nearby?? Did you just not think about that? Oh well... Shit happens! (Excuse my bad pun)

iamthunder 4

Thursday 30 January 2014 20:21

Hope you didn't throw it in his garbage bin :|

hynriech_lord 8

Thursday 30 January 2014 20:53

Ok, next time just knock and tell him you have to shit. You might be embarrassed but he will be more grossed out that you shit in a plastic bag than using a toliet.