Health: Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me "have...

By Anonymous - 31/03/2009 14:46 - United States

Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me "have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "you mean with other people?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 356

You deserved it 71 730

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Same thing different taste

By cocacola999 - 03/05/2014 10:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a party. Trying to overcome my social anxiety, I was trying to take part in conversations. So, when a girl mentioned she had a doctor's appointment next morning, I blurted out: "What kind of a doctor?" Everyone stared as she responded: "A gynaecologist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 751

You deserved it 7 803

By Anonymous - 20/07/2016 22:28 - United States - Columbus

Today, I went to a new doctor. While filling out charts she looked up and said, "I'm assuming you are single." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 764

You deserved it 932

By N/A - 25/09/2012 04:13 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 473

You deserved it 2 841

By Anonymous - 29/04/2013 16:51 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 780

You deserved it 13 334

Mumble mumble

By Jess - 27/10/2015 20:16

Today, I called a doctor's office for a referral. I was in public, so when she asked me what type of issue I had, I mumbled that I had a vaginal issue. After painstakingly having to repeat this several times, she said she was asking what kind of insurance I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 839

You deserved it 4 487

By whitecollar - 05/12/2012 02:43 - United Kingdom - Scarborough

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 044

You deserved it 33 427

By loveless - 18/10/2009 10:30 - Australia

Today, I realised that the last three people to see my intimate parts these last weeks were my beautician, my doctor and the lady who did my check up ultra sound. Oh, and I'm married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 597

You deserved it 5 715

By WTFFAIL - 03/12/2012 05:06 - Canada - Montreal

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 576

You deserved it 9 006

Gender bending

By Anonymous - 03/09/2021 16:59

Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 201

By Brook - 26/02/2013 08:21 - Australia - Sydney

Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 464

You deserved it 3 830

UrLifeDoesntSuck 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:28

"No, 'lefty' doesn't count. If you ever do, use a condom."

Zynris 10

Saturday 24 August 2013 6:32

Judging by your comment and profile picture, I am just going to assume you are white trash.

Comments

Atashi_fml 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 22:35

#95 doesn't get it either. And doesn't most of the population **********?

killa_chris 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 4:33

lmfaoo at #25

giffinator 0

Monday 13 April 2009 0:34

lol #30 and all these comments

jwise97 2

Monday 13 April 2009 21:23

haha nearly as good as my response to that question.. "are you offering?" my doc is a woman (and a pretty one at that).

babyitsfact 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 0:34

lol @ #30. i think you deserved it. think first. talk later. but don't think too long or your doctor'll think you're thinking up a lie.

ivan0072 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 4:45

Ummm wow ydi!

happygoluckyhh 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 3:50

Your such a ******* idiot! No wonder your not getting any!

xxxemily 2

Tuesday 5 January 2010 1:28

wow you guys are mean. you act like you've never said anything stupid in your life.

benners 0

Saturday 3 April 2010 6:05

nooooo dumbshit with him!!!!

briiana012 3

Sunday 6 June 2010 14:33

lmao thats really funny

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The Top

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 636

You deserved it 42 714

Today, I went to get the vaccination my college requires of all students. The nurse looked at my charts and told me there was good and bad news. The good news was that I didn't need the shot. The bad news was I needed four others. Now, both of my arms are swollen enough to make Popeye proud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 491

You deserved it 3 817

The Top

Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 292

You deserved it 2 348

Today, I found out while pet-sitting that a white cat is no easier to see in the dark than a black cat. I also found out that this particular cat doesn't take kindly to being accidentally kicked, even if it wasn't that hard. My feet have seen better days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 235

You deserved it 298

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. I speak 4 languages and thought if I spoke French, the Officer would let me off with a warning thinking I was a tourist. Afterwards I turned to my wife and said "I can't believe that worked." He was a few feet away and heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 483

You deserved it 104 705

Today, I was singing to my cat and she reached up and put her paw over my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 094

You deserved it 38 829

Today, my mum and I decided to go on a hike. Beforehand we left my car at the end of the trail and took my mums car to the beginning. After 4 hours we arrived at my car. I had left my keys in mums car. It was a long walk back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 381

You deserved it 29 315

Today, while I was in the shower, my very drunken mother came home. She then barged into the shower with me, still completely clothed, and gave me the longest, most awkward hug of a lifetime. After she left me still in shock, she came back and did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 225

You deserved it 2 809

Same thing different taste

Mumble mumble

Gender bending

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