Love: Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next... - FML

By Anonymous - 28/03/2009 20:18 - United States

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 46

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Top comments

TheEmoPrepGirl 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 1:19

Ouch! Dump her and get on with your life!

bioclock 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 1:27

I hope you knocked on your neighbor's door and dumped the bitch right then and there.

Comments

pinguino3669_fml 23

Thursday 11 July 2013 6:16

That's really sad I'm so sorry :'( at least technology let you know the truth about them!

Sarairwin49 22

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:27

damn that's harsh dude. I'm so sorry :(

kayliebh 6

Wednesday 11 September 2013 21:21

Omg!!!!! Wow that's crazy

Jennaflamingo 14

Sunday 27 October 2013 20:31

Time to dump a hoe

poppet91 4

Wednesday 30 October 2013 15:57

Shame man! thats bullshit!

RKD 23

Tuesday 24 December 2013 8:29

It's the horse that just KILLS me! Didn't spot that at first!

mxij 13

Tuesday 28 January 2014 4:20

I think she was full

vinny098 22

Monday 3 February 2014 21:12

lol

rigley06 12

Saturday 17 May 2014 19:50

Get a gun and pop a few caps through the wall

lalaney 14

Sunday 18 May 2014 1:18

So, you hear people banging and it gives you an urge to eat? My guess is that you're not servicing your girl often enough, and she's looking to get her needs met elsewhere.

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I found out that since no other procedures are working, I was required to stop eating, and drink a bunch of foul tasting "goo", which will in turn give me constant diarrhea. This will then prepare me nicely for the long tube with a camera on the end of which will be shoved up my rectum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 697

You deserved it 3 897

Today, I found a picture on my phone of me and my best friend that I didn't take. Turns out my dad did, from behind, and it got onto my Google photo backup, which means that he was logged in to my Gmail from his phone when he did it. And my family wonders why I don't trust them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 124

The Top

Today, I stopped taking prescription narcotics for pain, which make you constipated. I also enjoyed a few beers. Because of this collaboration, I had a very painful first turd followed by a flow of burning liquid. I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 841

You deserved it 330

Today, I was riding my motorcycle on the highway and wearing all of my gear - boots, gloves, jacket, and full-face helmet. Somehow a bee found the only spot not covered on my body and stung my neck. I'm allergic to bees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 643

You deserved it 2 998

Today, I found my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 834

You deserved it 3 333

Today, I was called handsome. Too bad it was coming from a trashed homeless lady, who then went on to tell me that she likes my lips and wants to rape me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 460

You deserved it 4 202

Today, my girlfriend was feeling a little down, so I tried to console her. She said she just needed space and I respected that. Then an hour later she was fine, so I asked how she did it. She replied that she talked to her ex for a whole hour. This is a common procedure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 403

You deserved it 5 202

Today, everyone at work was demanding I stage a party at my house. I agreed to it and rushed home to tidy up before the guests arrived. No one showed up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 493

You deserved it 3 858