Transportation: Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating...

By fatty magoo - 29/07/2014 18:20 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 300

You deserved it 15 981

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Same thing different taste

Donut pass Go

By Anonymous - 22/11/2010 06:26 - United States

Today, I came through a DUI checkpoint. The trooper noticed some donuts I had. He asked, "Are those donuts?" Jokingly, I replied, "Yes. Why? Are you going to confiscate them?" He didn't see the humor and pulled me off to the side to have a team search my truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 338

You deserved it 29 236

Panic mode activated

By Man in car - 11/10/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I got pulled over by a cop car. As I was fumbling for my license and registration, I handed the officer a half-empty bag of Doritos I’d forgotten was in my glove box. He thought I was trying to bribe him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 176

You deserved it 297

By jj4320 - 17/09/2011 08:37 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for distracted driving. Not for cell phone use but for nose picking and inspecting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 663

You deserved it 41 016

By Anonymous - 25/04/2019 16:00

Today, I got pulled over and ticketed while taking cookies to the local police station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 880

You deserved it 796

By not as easy as pie - 16/10/2015 16:03 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to explain to a police officer that I wasn't drunk and had swerved because I was eating pie and almost dropped it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 226

You deserved it 21 362

By ironic driver - 04/09/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 568

You deserved it 4 614

By yulis - 30/11/2013 19:21 - United States - Hagerstown

Today, I got pulled over on the highway for going over the speed limit. The cop seemed nice, and I was sure he'd let me off with a warning, until my husband piped up with, "Didn't think you folks came out this far. What, the donut store got shut down or some shit?" I got the ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 449

You deserved it 7 295

Am I being detained?

By Anonymous - 15/10/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for speeding. I tried to make a joke to ease the tension and said, "I’m just trying to keep up with the traffic!" The officer looked around at the empty road and said, "What traffic? Are you under the influence? HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" It went downhill from there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 599

By Sarah-D - 29/07/2016 05:31

Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 274

You deserved it 2 266

The smell of freedom

By ThatNewCarSmell - 01/10/2014 16:53 - United States - Carlsbad

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 880

You deserved it 45 702

mif_fml 27

Tuesday 29 July 2014 23:13

It only works if you're Gabriel Iglesias and offering a box of Krispy Kreme.

grace31297 14

Wednesday 30 July 2014 0:07

…does that mean that you donut recommend trying it?

Comments

gothicminx89 3

Wednesday 30 July 2014 8:25

YDI. You shouldn't be eating whilst driving in the first place.

Journiexo 18

Wednesday 30 July 2014 8:27

Did you mean it in a kind way?

Ariaskye 17

Wednesday 30 July 2014 9:07

Yes. This. Just yes.

Mama4ddk 15

Wednesday 30 July 2014 9:43

LMMFAO like seriously, that is the only thing just stay here.

Mama4ddk 15

Wednesday 30 July 2014 9:44

LMMFAO seriously, that is the only thing to say here!

noved911 4

Wednesday 30 July 2014 13:18

YDI for stereotyping the cop.

Malfurious 17

Wednesday 30 July 2014 15:47

Well, no harm in trying I guess. But still, YDI.

East1986 4

Wednesday 30 July 2014 17:19

Cops prefer cupcakes now

rigley06 12

Wednesday 30 July 2014 19:24

In all fairness you were just being polite

sorahearts_fml 10

Wednesday 30 July 2014 19:48

How rude. Maybe he just came out of rehab and wasn't trying to relapse.

8313girl 28

Wednesday 30 July 2014 19:54

Please! His fat ass knows he wanted that sticky sweet doughnut. He just didn't want to be seen taking one while on video.

Keywords

Awkward Friends Love Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable Cars You're fired Work Parenting Kids Family Cats DIY Am I overreacting? Sex Intimacy Management Poopoo peepee Capitalism Coworkers Frustration ADHD Dogs Animals Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, my brother and sister-in-law come over ONLY to use up the resources at our house - like food, TV subscriptions, and other items. They claim to love my kids and come over for them. If only they would look up from their phone and spend actual time with the kids. Is there a way to block toxic relatives? FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 99

Today, I let my 4-month old puppy sleep with me. She’s been constipated for a while. I woke up to a foul odor in the middle of the night. Turns out she took a massive dump on the bed right by my head. I had to completely strip my bed to go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 473

The Top

Today, I received two letters: an eviction notice and a Dear John. Neither went through the mail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 820

You deserved it 91

Today, I was working at the mall as the girl that stands around giving out samples of the foods. This guy came up to me and we were flirting for at least 30 mins. With the tray in one hand, I gave him my cell to put his number in it. He ran away with my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 300

You deserved it 47 129

Today, my friends and I spent hours on the Disney website playing in Pixie Hollow. We made our own fairies and flew around completing tasks for TinkerBell and her fairy friends. We're in college, and this is how we spent our Saturday night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 873

You deserved it 63 415

Today, I was at a music festival, watching one of my favorite bands. The security guys were throwing water into the crowd to cool us down. I saw some about to be thrown by another fan, so I stood with my mouth open to catch some of it. I ended up with a face full of hot piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 872

You deserved it 20 249

Today, my mother was scolding my youngest sister for having unprotected sex with yet another partner. She continued with, "Why can't you be like your brother and just never have sex?" I'm 22, and she's not wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 280

You deserved it 5 232

Today, the director of the library was introducing me to the new HR person. She told the HR person that I'd been working here for 5 years. Actually, I've been working here for 19 years, and had been working here for 3 years before she got hired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 51