Miscellaneous: Today, I was sent to the office in the middle of class because... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Anonymous - 22/02/2017 20:07 - United States - La Vergne

Today, I was sent to the office in the middle of class because a teacher heard a joke I made at lunch and thought I planned to stab someone. Three people made jokes. I was the only one in trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 206

You deserved it 33

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Top comments

nonsensical 26

Friday 24 February 2017 23:50

Maybe you just have that face? The sort of face that looks like you want to stab someone? I know a few like that. Doesn't mean they would, but they sure look like they could.

Comments

nonsensical 26

Friday 24 February 2017 23:50

Maybe you just have that face? The sort of face that looks like you want to stab someone? I know a few like that. Doesn't mean they would, but they sure look like they could.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 520

You deserved it 15 072

Today, after 3 months of no orgasms, I was in the shower, working to rectify that. As I was seconds away from coming, my dad loudly knocked on the door and demanded to know how much longer I was going to take. Probably another 3 months now, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 797

You deserved it 9 486

The Top

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 396

You deserved it 4 101

Today, I was finishing a conversation with my husband. His phone rang, but he didn't take it. He said, "No, the guy said he was going to call me at 11:30 and it's 11:36. I'll call him in 3 minutes." It was then I realized that I have been the subject of this type of petty control for over 30 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 112

Today, I found out that the myth about what happens when you dream you're going to the toilet is not entirely untrue. At least for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 591

You deserved it 83

Today, I had a ridiculous dream where I was taking a piss that seemed to last forever, all while my sister was listening in and making sarcastic comments about it. I then woke up and immediately did the exact same thing, except with no sister making sarcastic comments about it. Not that it made it any better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 644

You deserved it 229

Today, I was sitting in the coffee shop where my boyfriend and I used to go before he broke up with me about a week ago. I was missing him and wishing he was there, when all of a sudden this 14-year-old kid comes up to me and says, "He's not coming, you may as well go home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 659

You deserved it 6 876

Today, I went to urgent care with a sinus infection. I get them regularly, and just need a course of antibiotics to clear it up, but the doctor insisted I needed to take a COVID test. It came back with a false positive. Now I have to take a week off work, and I still don't have my antibiotics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 834

You deserved it 348