Intimacy and Miscellaneous: Today, I was walking down my road in the hill-country of Texas,...

By whywasitthere - 19/04/2017 09:00 - United States - New Braunfels

Today, I was walking down my road in the hill-country of Texas, when I spotted something shiny buried in the dirt. Thinking it could be something interesting, I picked it up, and, after turning it over numerous times in my hand, realized that it was, in fact, an old silver bullet vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 106

You deserved it 1 082

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Same thing different taste

For all ages

By You Wish - 07/03/2009 07:35 - United States

Today, I was sitting on my 70 year-old grandmother's bed with my older brother. I decided to snoop through the cabinet at the back of her bed, and I pulled out what I naively thought was a strange looking flashlight. When I twisted the bottom of it to see what would happen, it started vibrating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 541

You deserved it 71 761

May be

By Anonymous - 29/02/2020 20:00

Today, while I was at my job as senior care, I was in a client's home vacuuming the carpet and found a very used vibrator that belonged to his wife. It wasn't clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 650

You deserved it 141

By Miffy - 04/09/2018 23:00 - United States - San Augustine

Today, my 14-year-old son asked his dog what she was chewing on. It wasn't until he picked it up said, "Is this what I think it is?" that I realized my son was gripping my vibrator. As I took it outside, mortified, he told his sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 676

You deserved it 883

By Noname - 13/03/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I needed money to go to the movie. I asked my mom if I could reach in her purse and grab a few bucks. When I opened up her purse her phone started to vibrate. I yelled over to my mom that her phone was ringing. She said the phone was next to her. I looked in the purse. It was a vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 304

You deserved it 5 341

By Heather - 26/06/2012 17:13 - United States - Newport News

Today, I discovered my children had found my vibrator and buried it in the cat's litter box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 506

You deserved it 12 747

Mortified

By Anonymous - 19/05/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, at work, my vibrator rolled out of my bag so far down the table that I couldn’t catch it, and had to run round the table to grab it by leaning between two of my male coworkers. That vibrator lives under my bed, so the only way it could've got in my work bag would be my boyfriend pranking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 180

Mortified

By Anonymous - 18/11/2020 01:08 - United States - Joplin

Today, I bought my first ever vibrator after months of wanting one. Apparently, I bought a cheap product, because it broke and started going off by itself later. It shook my whole dresser while my best friend and I were in the room. I couldn't get it to shut off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 157

You deserved it 273

Look mom!

By Anonymous - 29/11/2020 19:59

Today, I was having my 9 year-old son help me find the TV remote. We were searching my bedroom when all the sudden my son says, “Look, mom it’s right here!” I turn around to see him pointing to where the remote was with my vibrator like a teacher pointing at a blackboard with a pointer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 505

You deserved it 965

Ask first, snoop later

By Jenna Berreth - 07/10/2019 16:00

Today, I was trying to find my missing purple pen in the house I share with my boyfriend and his 57 year-old mother. I checked her room just in case, only to open a drawer and be greeted by a dildo. I’m never going to unsee that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 3 160

By Mygawdwhy - 21/01/2018 01:30

Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 187

You deserved it 2 060

Sagar Nair 11

Wednesday 19 April 2017 16:41

Well you gotta admit, that IS interesting.

Regulate 21

Wednesday 19 April 2017 16:42

Vampire hunters need to get off too I guess.

Comments

Manual_Manoosy 21

Thursday 20 April 2017 17:33

That's Amazing!!

Manual_Manoosy 21

Thursday 20 April 2017 18:05

Sounds like you're lucky day. Did it still work?

Cyberpope 3

Friday 21 April 2017 18:07

Discarded by the blonde because it was chipping her teeth?

msmarley 1

Sunday 23 April 2017 7:31

ROFLL too funny

Duckiewithasthma 1

Sunday 21 May 2017 22:46

Hey everyone, OP here, so sorry for the late reply to all of your excellent questions! Firstly, it did NOT work, that's why it took me a little while to realize what the button was supposed to do. I just dropped it and ran the rest of the way home to wash my hands. A couple hours later, though, I thought it was pretty funny and decided to go back for it, this time with a tissue to pick it up with. I washed it (with rubber gloves, mind you) and put it in a drawer with the other neat things I've found on the side of the road here, right next to a pair of broken spectacles. Hopefully no one opens the drawer. So there you have it, the full tale of my first encounter with a real sex toy.