Health: Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy...

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 02:24 - United States

Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 768

You deserved it 2 494

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Same thing different taste

Hard pass

By Mew - 04/06/2009 12:07 - United States

Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 232

You deserved it 4 087

Bag for life

By Anonymous - 25/02/2021 04:57 - United States

Today, my ambulance got called out for a "stomach pain" patient. Upon assessment, the guy really did have stomach pain. His colostomy bag fell off a week ago, so to stop the crap from falling out, he duct taped it shut. It exploded when I helped him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 374

You deserved it 73

Pissed

By kkmirw - 14/10/2019 05:00

Today, a colostomy bag exploded on me while I was waiting in line at the pharmacy. Yesterday, my shoes were peed on by a child while I was at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 815

You deserved it 105

On the scene

By fire1 - 25/10/2011 04:30 - United States

Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 319

You deserved it 2 327

By Anonymous - 28/05/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 271

You deserved it 3 445

Such a rewarding career

By DirtyNurse - 05/12/2020 07:01 - United States - Center Point

Today, I got projectile-vomited on while trying to administer meds to a patient. Twenty minutes later, a patient with schizophrenia threw his shitty diaper at my face. All this happened in the first hour of my 12-hour shift. I didn't bring any extra scrubs and I live an hour away from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 184

By StickyWicket - 14/05/2019 18:00

Today, at work where I'm a physiotherapist, I was helping a patient with lower back pain. While I was massaging him, he shat himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 076

You deserved it 130

True hero

By MentalHealthWorker - 17/09/2020 02:05

Today, I once again had to clean up a shower and bathroom covered in feces, because of client with incontinence. It smelt so bad that I couldn’t hide my reaction; the client saw my face and I could see the embarrassment on theirs. I spent the rest of the day feeling like an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 560

You deserved it 241

Both sides now

By microtech - 13/12/2011 17:33 - United States

Today, at the microbiology lab, I discovered that the guy who took the shift before me didn't sterilize the work space very well. I am now blowing chunks from both ends from a very nasty strain of E. Coli. My company blames me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 682

You deserved it 3 347

Pushing the envelope

By Anonymous - 02/04/2022 04:00

Today, I was constipated and strained so hard that I threw up into my pants and all over my shoes. I was at work, and no, I didn’t have a change of clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 180

snakerake 10

Friday 24 February 2012 8:40

Wouldn't you have to clean it off? It could easily contaminate other things or people causing health risks.

harrystylesfan69 5

Friday 24 February 2012 8:42

having fecal matter all over you is pretty disgusting ....regardless the job

Comments

Anfernee12 0

Saturday 25 February 2012 4:23

Shit happens

terrask 11

Saturday 25 February 2012 6:45

I call bullshit. OP implies he'll stay in the soiled uniform until shift end... I'm a paramedic and being contaminated like that with bodily fluids would put me ''out-of-service'' by law until I shower and change clothes. Not doing so, I would endanger myself and future patients with contamination, which is basically enough to be accused of criminal neglect. Anyway, that's how we do it up here in Canada.

2cute4u_18 1

Saturday 25 February 2012 7:02

Yummmmm

snafu63 0

Saturday 25 February 2012 8:07

I can't imagine they wouldn't allow you to get cleaned up.

SILVERSTAR_6 17

Saturday 25 February 2012 8:37

Holy shit..literally yer life does suck..sorry it happened to ya :/

Grand_Cookie 21

Saturday 25 February 2012 10:15

I was going to make a poop joke, but this just sucks too much. Sorry dude.

chelseakatelyn 0

Saturday 25 February 2012 10:45

Been there. Medical field is shitty sometimes. Every pun possible intended.

MikeMorin18 4

Saturday 25 February 2012 15:51

Thats why I have 2 spare sets of uniforms at the bay.

Sanch101 7

Saturday 25 February 2012 18:42

Wouldn't it be incredibly unhygenic and also dangerous to allow you to carry on with a paramedic shift if covered in fecal matter? Surely they would not allow this as the likelihood of infection if having to attend an open wound incident would be massive and this would open you employer up to a massive lawsuit.