Health: Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came...

By PiZzA_FaCe - 29/05/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 337

You deserved it 5 279

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Same thing different taste

Reported

By maximumpower - 15/03/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 155

You deserved it 3 524

By mew - 25/10/2011 18:04 - Canada

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 174

You deserved it 3 236

By Momo8612 - 21/04/2017 12:00

Today, while shopping for groceries, a small child pointed at my face and exclaimed : "DOGGIE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 689

You deserved it 306

By downlowtooslow - 12/06/2009 04:49 - United States

Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 655

You deserved it 6 873

By Phycheledic - 12/05/2016 10:22 - United States

Today, I was volunteering at the daycare in my area. When this one kid was leaving, he asked his mom, "Why is she so ugly?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 515

You deserved it 1 595

By Anonymous - 25/11/2013 19:47 - United States - Olive Branch

Today, I was at the grocery store, when a little boy looked up at me and asked if I was a prostitute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 963

You deserved it 13 842

Leftovers

By Anonymous - 16/09/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I woke up to my cat licking my face. Cute, right? Turns out, she was licking the crumbs off my cheek from last night's pizza party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 498

Ewwwww

By EwFace - 06/06/2009 16:23 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a little boy. I opened up a new bottle of bubbles and it was all goopy and gross so I said, "Eww!" The boy then asked, "What's "ew" mean?" I replied, "Something gross and yucky." Then he pointed at my face and say "Ew! Ew! Ewwww!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 616

You deserved it 8 908

Exhaustion

By Shell - 05/03/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 403

You deserved it 4 421

By notyouagain - 03/10/2010 07:40 - Australia

Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year old son answered the door and when he saw me said, 'oh great, it's YOU' and slammed the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 588

You deserved it 4 947

peacelovepugs 7

Monday 1 August 2011 6:34

acne.

hk_fml 9

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:39

Ohhhh man. That is so unfortunate.

Comments

svonga 3

Saturday 19 March 2011 7:46

hahaha I totally said that to my sisters boyfriend when I was little. I feel bad everytime I see him :p

kaylapple 1

Sunday 24 July 2011 3:22

bad acne?

PurpleChica9 0

Thursday 24 November 2011 9:59

I can relate to you sadly... it's painful

writergirl23 19

Friday 17 February 2012 21:13

Haha you gotta love pimples

Marifer98 7

Saturday 18 February 2012 16:54

What kind of pizza? (:

Marifer98 7

Saturday 18 February 2012 16:54

What kind of pizza? (:

ConradKay 13

Tuesday 5 June 2012 3:23

Was he on bath salts?

Mademoiselle_fml 34

Sunday 1 July 2012 13:18

Eh, my parents used to call me an ear of corn because of all of my bumps u.u'

tellyc 27

Friday 27 December 2013 6:35

That's his way of complimenting you!

DalekBubbles 18

Friday 21 March 2014 14:42

I WOULD LOVE FOR MY FACE TO LOOK LIKE A PIZZA PLEASE TEACH ME

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Kids Parenting DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, I wanted to show my friends my cat’s “high-five” trick. I held out my hand, and instead of a high-five, my cat scratched and bit me instead. I yelped, and my friends burst into laughter. I had to bandage my hand, all whilst they joked about “cat training.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 375

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 423

You deserved it 13 444

The Top

Today, the metropolitan police told women to "flag a bus" if we don't feel safe with a lone male officer. Because that'll work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 912

You deserved it 106

Today, me and my coworkers were making fun of this girl we work with. I drew an ugly but funny picture of her and thought it was fun to email it around the office. I sent it to a coworker named Joann. Or so I thought. I actually sent it to another Joann, who is one of the directors of the company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 3 074

Today, I started my first day at work. When I used the bathroom, I thought I was peeing into the bowl but it was actually leaking out. My pants kindly cleaned up the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 370

You deserved it 2 360

Today, it's the one-year anniversary of opening my own store. I love books and baking, so I turned my hobby into a career by opening a bookstore with a small cafe and bakery attached. I was not prepared for how hard the job would be, so now I hate my career AND my hobby as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 609

Today, during my first man-to-man conversation with my girlfriend's father, he decided to mention the details of lion mating patterns he'd once witnessed. After a lengthy description of the lion's barbed penis, he said, "It also made me feel better about myself that I could last longer than a lion." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 372

You deserved it 2 726

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 092

You deserved it 40 037