Love: Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms...

By Starchyld - 11/11/2009 12:21 - Canada

Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like eachother. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says: "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 940

You deserved it 4 135

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/01/2012 05:32 - United States

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 382

You deserved it 2 630

By bregaja - 25/02/2016 18:59 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his mom for the very first time. After shaking my hand and looking me up and down, she loudly proclaimed, "She doesn't have the right hips to have kids." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 858

You deserved it 1 625

By fridgemylifee - 13/08/2015 17:39 - United States

Today, I had a first date with a guy I met online. And his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 491

You deserved it 2 986

By anonymous - 24/10/2010 16:14 - United States

Today, I went on a movie date with a guy. He brought his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 652

You deserved it 4 077

By Anonymous - 14/06/2016 02:39 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, on a first date, he told me I look like his ex's mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 242

You deserved it 953

Been there, done that

By Anonymous - 05/08/2014 02:00 - United States - New Ulm

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 876

You deserved it 4 616

Bat out of hell

By goodeyesight - 11/10/2012 14:02 - Brazil - Sào Paulo

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 363

You deserved it 31 750

Classic

By KDH - 26/01/2024 09:00 - United States - Santa Monica

Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 526

You deserved it 122

Mammy's boy

By Anonymous - 14/04/2023 22:00

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. We hit it off, and he invited me back to his place. As soon as we got there, his mother came out of nowhere and started interrogating me about "my intentions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 168

By Tiffosaur - 04/01/2013 06:12 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 012

You deserved it 2 654

Raiderwrstler65 0

Wednesday 11 November 2009 16:08

lol you must be a good selection for him to plant his seed

chloelove210 0

Wednesday 11 November 2009 16:07

OMG thats soooo awkward! runnnnnn!!!!!!!

Comments

hassenpfeffermmm 0

Wednesday 28 April 2010 6:51

at least he understands anatomy!! He knows your boobs are for your young, not implants.

Allielovespanda 0

Tuesday 15 June 2010 7:15

you obviously don't know what it means to have baby makin hips :) majority of guys think curvy women are sexy. lighten up guuuurl.

rawrkittehpwnage 0

Friday 2 July 2010 0:31

o.o

ItsmeRJ_ 0

Sunday 21 November 2010 18:52

You should say and my mom was right: You do have a creepers mouth!

YoungBanks 3

Sunday 24 April 2011 4:21

the guy you went out with I'll take a guess and say a redneck incest hick "you got good breedin' hips"

ashley1357 0

Thursday 28 April 2011 6:37

that's kinda gross

skeleton_skinner 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 9:06

and you're mad why? be flattered. he didn't call you fat or some shit

ashhxoxo 14

Monday 11 July 2011 6:57

what does he think you are, a dog? poor babyy. that sucks

thatviolinplayer 0

Friday 22 July 2011 14:48

thats really creepy

npb123 0

Sunday 16 October 2011 19:46

Well that's awkward!!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was at a family gathering when my aunt asked me if I was seeing anyone special. In a tired and sarcastic tone, I jokingly said, “I’m actually getting married next month!” The room went silent, then some of them cheered. I had to explain I was kidding, but now they’re looking forward to a wedding I didn’t agree to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 502

Today, I had a horrible day at work, came home early and burst into tears as soon as I was in the door. I curled up on the sofa, still bawling, and my cat came over and jumped up for a cuddle. I gave her a hug and she threw up down my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 080

You deserved it 4 772

The Top

Today, I had sex with a guy on the first date. I couldn’t wait, he was too gorgeous. The only problem was that when we finished, he announced that he had to fart and did so twice. Now I’m not so sure if I’ll see him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 232

You deserved it 7 117

Today, at school, I got stuck in the elevator and was about to panic before I remembered I had my phone. I called my mother and she called the school to tell them that I was stuck. They got me out in a few minutes and then confiscated my phone and gave me two detentions for using it in school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 571

You deserved it 3 451

Today, my mom told me my relationship is a joke, because teenagers don't understand the meaning of relationships and commitment. I couldn't help but remind her how she's divorced three separate men to date. She hit me over the head so hard that snot flew out of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 910

You deserved it 11 264

Today, my brother and I found a little bird that couldn't fly. While trying to convince my mom that it couldn't fly so we could keep it, I lightly tossed it in the air and it landed a few feet in front of me. Then my cat grabbed it and ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 792

You deserved it 49 899

Today, I realised that whenever I make eye contact with a stranger, I yawn. I work at a McDonald's FML

I agree, your life sucks 870

You deserved it 160

Today, in a serious bid to lose weight, I’ve changed my lifestyle, including throwing away the 20-odd takeaway menus we keep in the kitchen. It’s only been two hours and we’ve already had five new menus from local takeaways delivered through the letterbox. Why, Universe, why do you wish me to stay fat? FML

I agree, your life sucks 261

You deserved it 346