Health: Today, I was at a house-warming party and my friend was in her...

By trbaby - 14/02/2017 15:00 - United States - El Cajon

Today, I was at a house-warming party and my friend was in her kitchen making drinks. When I was almost done with my drink, I went to take the last gulp and saw three mouse turds stuck to the inside bottom of the glass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 793

You deserved it 551

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By goodmorning - 07/09/2014 13:45 - United States - Nashville

Today, I was eating a bowl of cereal and noticed something float to the top. On closer inspection, it turned out to be a mouse turd. I had already eaten half the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 694

You deserved it 4 461

Wild night, huh?

By Anonymous - 06/06/2019 22:00

Today, I had a party at my house. I have a nice laptop that I hook up to the stereo, but someone almost spilt beer on it, so I took it downstairs. Later on in the night, I went down to look something up on it. Someone had taken a shit on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 944

You deserved it 417

By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 201

You deserved it 590

Added protein

By Anonymous - 10/02/2021 00:30

Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 949

You deserved it 192

Alas, poor Stuart

By ShouldIHelpIt - 18/05/2016 02:46 - United States - Northampton

Today, I woke up to hear dripping water in the kitchen. Thinking it was someone getting a glass of water or something, I came out to find that it was just a mouse drowning in my dog's water bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 822

You deserved it 946

Alas, poor Mickey

By Anonymous - 21/10/2019 14:00

Today, I'm going to a cocktail event, except my dress is wrinkled and can't be ironed, so I got my steam cleaner from storage. I saw what looked like mold inside the water container. Turns out a mouse had got into it, drowned and started to decompose. My apartment now smells like death and my dress is still wrinkled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 432

You deserved it 247

By Ewwwwww - 04/02/2010 18:53 - United States

Today, I discovered that the rancid stench in my bathroom was a decaying carcass of a mouse in my toilet tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 740

You deserved it 3 349

By Sarah-grace - 17/05/2016 22:20 - United States - Benton

Today, I was dumping some old milk in the sink and noticed it wasn't going down. Assuming food was clogging the drain, I stuck my hand down in it to remove the food. I removed a blueberry and half a cockroach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 809

You deserved it 1 511

Partaaaaay!

By Anonymous - 18/07/2013 18:16 - Canada - Kelowna

Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 128

You deserved it 46 983

New filter

By hantavirus - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that the horrific smell coming from somewhere in my kitchen was a rotting dead mouse that somehow got stuck in my dishwasher. I have been eating off plates washed in dead mouse water for the past week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 353

You deserved it 11 510

Cynical_1 26

Wednesday 15 February 2017 0:24

Well hopefully it was an alcoholic drink. If it was then the alcohol should have killed any harmful microbes. If it wasn't then...well...good luck OP.

ClassieCassie 0

Wednesday 15 February 2017 0:34

Hopefully, you submitted this from a doctors office. Ouch.

Comments

Cynical_1 26

Wednesday 15 February 2017 0:24

Well hopefully it was an alcoholic drink. If it was then the alcohol should have killed any harmful microbes. If it wasn't then...well...good luck OP.

Steve115s 7

Wednesday 15 February 2017 0:35

Did not know that

BananEnigma 24

Wednesday 15 February 2017 18:29

You can pour alcohol or use rubbing alcohol on wounds to prevent infection, but it would have to be a very high percentage alcoholic drink to actually kill ALL of the harmful microbes... like you'd pretty much have to be drinking straight ethyl hydroxide 100% proof with no additives...

ClassieCassie 0

Wednesday 15 February 2017 0:34

Hopefully, you submitted this from a doctors office. Ouch.

jcash52426 5

Wednesday 15 February 2017 1:40

Well know if you don't like something you eat and you can say it tastes like shit. And when they ask how do you know what shit tastes like you can say you accidentally ate some mouse shit.

alternative-facts 6

Wednesday 15 February 2017 2:21

Hey, maybe it's a delicacy, like the worm in the tequila bottles? Not buying it? Neither am I. Ew!

pjsr 32

Wednesday 15 February 2017 3:44

You need one more drink for each mouse turd ...at the very least

PennyLane27 32

Wednesday 15 February 2017 6:39

Holy frick! Between you and the OP with the mom that eats stuff that falls in the drain, I just...I cant. I'm done. If you need me, I'll be scrubbing every inch of my house 12 times.

TheZombieGirl 22

Wednesday 15 February 2017 7:51

Sorry OP, But from the burnt to a crisp mouse at the bottom of the stove at a family get together with another OP. To mouse turds at the bottom of your glass at a house warming party. Um, Just.. Trust no one...