Miscellaneous: Today, I went to a restaurant and asked for vegetarian options.... - FML

By Anonymous - 05/07/2015 19:20 - United States - Silverdale

Today, I went to a restaurant and asked for vegetarian options. They told me, "We have a chicken Caesar salad, will that work?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 295

You deserved it 6 997

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Smooth talker

By Kate - 07/03/2009 18:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and I told the waiter I'd have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 764

You deserved it 8 263

By Anonymous - 28/07/2015 13:14 - Australia - Sydney

Today, a customer bitched me out, saying he wouldn't eat his vegetarian dish because it didn't "look vegetarian enough." He then demanded a refund and a plate of the same vegetarian dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 255

You deserved it 1 522

By fmylyfe - 09/11/2013 14:15 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, while I was working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 902

You deserved it 3 966

By Bearwaitressities - 15/02/2017 21:00 - South Africa - Durban

Today, whilst working my waitressing job, I had a patron lose his rag at me because there was too much "green stuff" in his salad. What did he expect? Chicken? FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 268

You deserved it 430

Is that even legal?

By Anonymous - 17/11/2023 00:00

Today, I went to the cafeteria at work like I usually do, but couldn't find anything I liked. Turns out there's a new policy in place: the cafeteria is now serving only vegan foodstuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 654

You deserved it 131

By not even getting any of her shrimp - 11/02/2014 21:50 - United States - Draper

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 675

You deserved it 6 518

By thatisfuckedup - 13/06/2013 22:12 - United Kingdom

Today, I ordered some burgers at a fast food joint. When I said, "No lettuce," the cashier looked dumbfounded and asked, "What's that?" I literally had to say, "The green stuff" before she got it. I'm losing hope. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 454

You deserved it 3 884

By Anonymous - 20/08/2014 22:14 - Sweden - ?kersberga

Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 953

You deserved it 8 252

People suck

By why - 02/05/2016 20:08 - United States - Beachwood

Today, the family I was serving had ordered calamari and when I brought out the food, they started yelling at me because apparently their daughter was allergic to it. Just why would you order it then? FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 038

You deserved it 897

By Anonymous - 10/01/2018 01:30

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down at the restaurant, he immediately snatched my menu and said "You're having salad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 078

You deserved it 526

Next

Top comments

senor_octubre 24

Monday 6 July 2015 11:39

Hey at least they didn't offer you a salad with meat in it...oh wait...

rhysfucker 24

Monday 6 July 2015 11:40

"Yeah, hold the chicken..."

Comments

onehotmomma90 12

Monday 6 July 2015 13:21

What about the bacon? Most Caesar salads at restaurants have bacon bits.

Not_Creative 12

Monday 6 July 2015 13:50

Where are you getting your Caesar salads? I eat a lot of Caesar salads at restaurants and at home and have never had/put bacon bits in them.

sandman676 20

Monday 6 July 2015 14:05

No bacon in Cesar salad HOW RUDE!!!

B00K_L0V3R93 31

Monday 6 July 2015 15:36

Then you're not eating a proper Chicken Caesar Salad. The typical ingredients for a Caesar Salad (and every Caesar Salad I've ever eaten) include coz lettuce, bacon bits, Parmesan cheese, croutons, egg (which can be optional) and dressing. Bacon is a necessity.

glabberfasted 16

Tuesday 7 July 2015 13:39

I have ordered a Caesar salad at every restaurant I frequent, and I have never once seen bacon in one...

vikky538 28

Monday 6 July 2015 13:39

Just because the name has salad... Doesn't mean it's vegetarian

worldclassrager 39

Monday 6 July 2015 14:09

It's fake chicken? And sometimes Caesar dressing has anchovies in it...so it looks like hold the chicken and a different dressing...or something else...there is bound to be something else on there...

TKPhai 21

Monday 6 July 2015 15:07

"Yup, chicken Ceaser salad would be fine, just don't put any chicken in it."

allforfun 23

Monday 6 July 2015 15:44

Being a vegetarian for 14 years I've heard this 1000 times.

SirMrButters 28

Monday 6 July 2015 17:22

That's why you tell them that chicken is meat for there tip

DroidFox 10

Monday 6 July 2015 17:56

YDI for being a vegetarian.

blueideamonkey97 11

Monday 6 July 2015 18:19

I was at a restaurant and asked if they had vegan options and she said "well we've got a turkey burger." I said, "that's not vegan," and she responded, "are you sure?"

IWishIWasObama 12

Monday 6 July 2015 18:40

eh.. close enough, lol

733yoda_fml 19

Monday 6 July 2015 20:08

Take the offer! Chicken Caesar is my favorite salad!

1
2
3
4
5

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

The Top

Today, I got home from a business trip and found my wife in bed with my sister. She tried to claim they had just had a girls' night and fell asleep watching a movie, even though when I caught them, they were naked, wet and my wife’s head was buried in my sister's crotch. Movie night, sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 148

Today, the woman I love, who rejected me countless times, got a boyfriend. Bitter about it, I post on my Instagram Story: “I could have been your love bug, but apparently you’re into roaches.” She posted a story of them kissing, saying, “I love my roach so much!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 49

You deserved it 1 353

The Top

Today, I had to have emergency work done on my teeth after I seized in the shower and smashed my face into the tub. Apparently, the dental insurance I'd been paying for but had never used ended its coverage 4 days ago, because my job was no longer working with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 623

You deserved it 100

Today, I sent a question to a newspaper self-help column about how I often feel ignored. I quickly received a note telling me to not feel ignored, but due to the volume of questions, I would likely not receive a response. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 983

You deserved it 363

Today, I found out I do not have a fast metabolism, I've actually had a tape worm living inside me for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 317

You deserved it 3 704

Today, I was arrested. The policeman threw me to the ground because I wouldn't answer his questions. This was after he told me I had the "right to remain silent". FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 417

You deserved it 8 488

Today, I was interviewing a woman for a job. She told me that she may need days off because of her artistic son. I jokingly replied, "Does he color on the walls or something?" She then stared at me with a weird look on her face. Autistic, her son is autistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 861

You deserved it 22 333

Today, I made a frustrating discovery about my new bunny. He can’t stand the fan in my small studio apartment, and thumps angrily and refuses to sleep if it's on. I can’t sleep with it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 646

You deserved it 444