By way2gosam - 26/05/2009 04:52 - United States
way2gosam tells us more.
Okay, I'm finally writing back to all 401 of your comments. Yes, I am a pregnant teenager- although, I can not see how that has any revelance to my post, pregnancy in teenagers happens quite often and I do not appreciate the judgemental/negative comments being thrown at me. It's pure slander. Yes, the father and I did have a fallout and I will be raising the baby on my own, with the help and support of my family and friends- not to mention he lives in the northern part of the state that I live in, which happens to be 4-5 hours away, even if he wanted to be here for the arrival of our child(which we are expecting to be a girl), he could not make it here on time. Therefore, my mother is my "go'to man", for lack of better words. I also notice you all are saying that he wouldn't want to hold my hand or watch the baby being born, I never said he would be in the delievery room- I simply asked him to keep my company during the scary hours of contractions that were yet to come, until my mother could arrive and take over. Yes, we had previously discussed it, and he had said that if need-be, he would be there. Unfortunately for me, he was speaking pure lies. As for the premature labor I did go into, they did stop it, and I am now on bed rest while taking a medicine called "terbutaline" every 4 hours in order to hold her until full term. (Which is also why I could write my FML, I didn't come home taking care of a baby, I came home on bed rest so I could have my baby at the correct time. I had nothing else to do but write my FML.) I do understand how confusing and misleading my post was, but keep in mind you only get a certain amount of letters to work with when writing your original FML, and by reading this I'm sure you've noticed that I could not elaborate thouroughly with 300 letters as a maximum. I do appreciate your opinions, even though I do not agree with all the statements that were made. Just wanted to explain since there were so many confused people.
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I'm curious as to why you expected your 'crush' to be there, and not the father of your child? I mean, perhaps you two had some sort of falling out, or he doesn't want to be involved. Still, I'd be more pissed about the other person responsible for the child not being there than someone I had feelings for. Also, from what I gather you do sound pretty young, and assuming your friend would be roughly the same age, I think your demanding a bit too much to ask him to come to the hospital without some prior discussion about it, which leads me to think you may not be as close to this person as you think you are. If he didn't impregnate you it's not his responsibility, and commiting to such an event is a big deal. The thing that troubles me the most is that on the day you had a child, you instead were more concerned and more emotionally involved with the fact that some guy that you liked wasn't there. And I hope that's not a precursor for the rest of your child's life, ie. becoming more concerned with your romantic life than with your spawn.
ok, my mom had me when she was 19, and my deadbeat dad wasn't around and her "crush" became the best father i could ever ask for, way more than making up for the sperm donor. all of you that are knocking her for having a kid, accidents happen. its life. there are lots of things that could go wrong even while using protection. Just because she wants her mom there, or her crush/best friend doesn't make her a little kid. and even if she was, not all young parents are bad parents.
It's not really his responsibility to be there unless he's the father. Sounds like you are putting too much pressure on him because you like him. And that's unfair of you. Anyway, I'm surprised you'd want your "crush" to see you all sweaty and grunting and screaming in pain. Not exactly the most flattering moment of your life.
I think that maybe saying he was her "crush" and best friend was only explaining how important he was to her. You don't want to be all by yourself in a situation like that. It would be terrifying. And you know what, stuff happens. Just because you get pregnant out of wedlock doesn't mean you're a bad person or destined to be a bad mother. I think she's doing a brave thing, having a baby without a partner to help her take care of him/her. And single mothers aren't bad people if they want to have a romantic life. And no one said she was persuing this guy. Sometimes you just feel how you feel. I will say, however, that he is obviously a bad choice of crush and best friend. As for the mom, who better to have with you when you're expecting than someone whose been through the same thing and loves you? Good luck to the mommy/mommy to be! (Depending on if they stopped the premature labor.)
If he replied "I can't" How did you know he was eating cornflakes? Anyways. Hope you feel better
It kind of sounds like you are a mean person who no one really likes or wants to associate with....Did you really only have that one person to call? Is there really no one else in your life that you could have called? I really don't know what would possess someone to not want to come to their friends labor, unless you have done something to piss him off in the past...Judging by "waytogosam" it seems like you might be a little bitchy and expect too much from him when he has his own thing going on..Why didn't you just call the baby daddy? Were you raped? Have an unknown SD? It's really hard to determine if this is an FYL or YDI because I don't know what type of person you are and what type of person your friend is, so it's kinda hard for me to judge...I also wanna point out that there's a lot of questions brought up in this FML. There's a lot of lose ends here and shit that doesn't make sense at all...Like why were you by yourself, where's your baby daddy? No family members to assist you? Wtf? It might even be a fake FML but who knows..
How did you know that he was eating cornflakes and watching TV? You were in hospital, and I assume he was at home... am I missing something here?
#40: True. But "in the now" having babies before you are, say, old enough to vote is a PROBLEM. Certainly having babies without a father around to help take care of them is a PROBLEM. I don't know the OP's situation, but don't you go around acting like this is okay. It was premature labor, so maybe Daddy couldn't make it, what with plans being suddenly different. But if Daddy is still in the picture, who's the "crush"? And if Daddy is not in the picture, then that is the problem. Not the OP's fault, but he should be there, whether he gives a crap about Mommy or not. Either way, ONE of them gets a YDI.
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he probably knows you are into him so is avoiding being to close to you incase he gets the position of father figure to your child and is therefore stuck with you and the kid forever, he saved himself from having a fml
Is he the father? If he is, he should be more than a "crush". Sounds like a bad choice to me either way.