Miscellaneous: Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached... - FML

By CandyMachine - 16/02/2011 23:58 - United States

Today, I went to the vending machine, put in a dollar, and reached down to grab my snack. The slot door wouldn't open, so I pushed it harder. I got my hand in, but the door got stuck again, this time with my hand inside. I tried to push with my other hand. It got stuck too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 822

You deserved it 9 840

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Same thing different taste

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By Not my day - 28/11/2022 21:00 - United States

Today, I tried to get something out of a vending machine. It got stuck. I tried getting something else to knock it down. That got stuck too. I tried a third time… take a wild guess. One massive tirade later, someone came and tried to help me out. Stuck. Four times in a row. How is that even possible? FML

I agree, your life sucks 761

You deserved it 172

By aquagoddess - 03/07/2018 19:00

Today, I used the last of my money to buy a bag of vending machine chips for dinner. It got stuck. A passerby saw and generously offered to buy another bag of the same chips to dislodge it. Gratefully, I accepted his offer. It stayed stuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 751

You deserved it 276

Man vs. Machine

By Anonymous - 08/09/2024 14:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I spent way too long battling a vending machine that ate my dollar but didn’t give me my snack. After shaking it, kicking it, and practically hugging it, I finally gave up. As I walked away in defeat, it dropped the snack. I rushed back to claim my prize… and the janitor grabbed it before I could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 92

By Z'ev - 05/04/2013 16:34 - United States - New York

Today, I went to get my car fixed. There was a vending machine in the waiting room, and I was hungry. The snacks were overpriced, but I still had a little money left over. I noticed a bag of Cheetos hanging loose, so I paid for them, hoping to get two bags. They both got stuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 484

You deserved it 10 044

Goober

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 02:00

Today, at a local mini mart, I tried several times to open a door that clearly said "PUSH" by pulling it, much to the amusement to the customers and staff inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 219

You deserved it 783

By Eodowoiono - 06/08/2013 16:20 - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, as a joke, my friend put my bus money in the vending machine. Not only did the machine not return my money, it wouldn't give me an item in return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 320

You deserved it 4 600

By quarterback - 23/01/2011 05:43 - United States

Today, while at the vending machine, I put in my $20 instead of my $1. I got my change back in quarters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 103

You deserved it 44 611

Great idea

By dumbbb - 27/12/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 264

You deserved it 46 030

By iblamethetories - 11/10/2012 17:49 - United Kingdom - Colchester

Today, I had to pay my bus fare in very small change. After carefully counting out coins under the withering glares of a bus-load of people, I quickly slid them into the machine, and somehow ended up jamming it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 838

You deserved it 4 863

By Anonymous - 07/04/2009 15:51 - Japan

Today, I was in a store using the only bathroom there. After I was done, I realized I couldn't open the door. Panicked it locked me in, I banged on the door, and screamed for help. The security and a whole group of people gathered, only to find that I was pulling the door instead of pushing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 445

You deserved it 91 603

Next

Top comments

giantsofeast 2

Thursday 17 February 2011 8:59

lol you remind me of homer Simpson

schwiggidy 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 8:59

when it don't fit in the slot, harder! harder!

Comments

JohnDoeLim 4

Thursday 17 February 2011 17:56

How did you managed that?? lol

thatgirlinoregon 21

Thursday 17 February 2011 18:12

This reminds me of Mr. Bean.

Stupidpeopleanno 5

Thursday 17 February 2011 18:54

At least you got the snacks!

Jester7 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 21:17

I've never read anything so stupid in my life

BoJanglesHC 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 22:50

I feel like you ate just weak as hell.

SpanishFutbol201 0

Friday 18 February 2011 0:55

pendejo

stfu21 0

Friday 18 February 2011 1:31

lmao hopefully you got that snickers bar

niinjablast 0

Friday 18 February 2011 3:12

this just reminded me of a simpsons episode..... lmao

LJgirl15 0

Friday 18 February 2011 4:29

Hahaha FAIL! Dude! Ditch the twinkie! It's not worth it! Lmao

Carr28 0

Friday 18 February 2011 4:48

How did you type that then

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Keywords

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The Top

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You deserved it 42 708

Today, my company told me that they refuse to buy me new safety footwear without a doctor's note, because my shoe size is three sizes smaller than the minimum size my company provides. I actually have to get my doctor to prove my shoe size. FML

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You deserved it 1 300

The Top

Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML

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You deserved it 3 090

Today, I was in the toilet when somebody started banging on the door loudly. I panicked and immediately cleaned my self and opened the door. As I opened the door, my brother vomited all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 996

You deserved it 2 789

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 573

You deserved it 49 770

Today, my grandpa took out the family for dinner and paid for everyone. He paid the bill and my family and I were waiting by the door. I realised I probably should thank him for dinner. I turn around without thinking and give him a big hug and say thanks for dinner Grandpa. It wasn't my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 304

You deserved it 44 910

Today, I was officially diagnosed with OCD. My mother's reaction? "That's not possible, she's a fucking slob." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 372

You deserved it 2 598

Today, as a millennial, I had to explain to a baby boomer why he needs to use condoms when having sex with his 25-year-old girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 294

You deserved it 217