Health: Today, I woke up early to go to church with my parents. When...

By Anonymous - 09/01/2011 19:08 - United States

Today, I woke up early to go to church with my parents. When I got in the car, I was struck with the worst diarrhea I've ever had in my life. My parents told me I'd be cleaning the car out when we got there, because if we turned around, we'd be late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 533

You deserved it 3 218

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Same thing different taste

By Username - 27/01/2011 17:40 - Romania

Today, I was running late for school because I had a huge stomach ache. To save on time, I took a taxi. When the taxi driver hit a bump, I lost control of my bowels and shit myself. Not only do I have to wash my underwear in the sink at school now, but I had to pay the driver extra to remove the smell from his car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 122

You deserved it 5 707

Quick Stop

By poopy pants - 08/04/2013 01:47 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 376

You deserved it 8 736

By I stink - 18/12/2018 15:30

Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 368

You deserved it 230

Trumpet solo

By Churizmo - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at a party and I really had to use the bathroom. There were 30-40 people talking outside the door, so I thought it would be ok to make some noise. Just as I'm about to begin having explosive diarrhea, everyone fell silent as my dad began to pray for our meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 248

You deserved it 5 553

Classy

By embaressed - 19/12/2009 09:44 - United States

Today, I was standing outside a store about to flirt with this guy when my mother drove up and shouted, "Hurry up, I have diarrhea!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 845

You deserved it 3 087

No exit! No choice!

By Anonymous - 13/11/2019 03:00

Today, I was driving my car when I suddenly got diarrhea and shat my pants. I put a plastic bag under me to not let all the shit go through my pants and get to my seat. Then one of my workmates saw my car and came to say hello. She saw all the shit and the plastic bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 252

You deserved it 301

Ralph and Huey

By justmyluck - 12/02/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, my mom picked me up from school due to me being sick. Afterwards, she took a detour to the DMV, and I waited in the car. I ended up vomiting everywhere, clothes included, and had to sit in the car for three hours while the taste and smells lingered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 726

You deserved it 4 910

Fools rush in

By Anonymous - 15/11/2022 10:00 - United States - Utica

Today, after a shopping trip, I had the worst diarrhea attack and almost shat my pants before I could even get in the front door. By the time I could get the door open, it was taking all of my self-control to keep from shitting myself. I had to shit on the toilet with the front door and bathroom door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 172

By Anonymous - 25/12/2017 15:00

Today, I was in a huge traffic jam with my boyfriend due to heavy snowfall. After being in the car for 4 hours, we were stuck in a tunnel with hundreds of cars behind and in front of us. Then the diarrhea hit. I had to shit in a plastic bag in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 539

You deserved it 383

By sadddddd - 11/09/2011 01:54 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 881

You deserved it 3 270

nikkibeez 0

Monday 10 January 2011 0:07

that's disgusting. fyl, mainly for having such shitty parents.

mandypandypants 4

Monday 10 January 2011 4:07

fyl for having parents that care more about jesus than their own son.

Comments

DakotaCat 4

Monday 10 January 2011 0:36

Ydi for eating the lutefisk!

mrahhhhh 21

Monday 10 January 2011 0:55

#12 wins forever. And OP, at least you didn't shit your pants going to work. As far as I know, God wouldn't discriminate against people who smell bad, but your boss probably does. Then again I'm atheist and haven't been to church in over 5 years, so I don't know if the churchfolk would be as forgiving. :?

Bee_Dee 0

Monday 10 January 2011 1:06

So, you woke up early, got ready for church, and then spent the mass cleaning your own crap? Sucks.

UpsidedownKayak 9

Monday 10 January 2011 1:10

Yes, that is what happened.

hisattentionspan 0

Monday 10 January 2011 1:34

Yup, I would be pissed and the parents...

mulattogurl08 0

Monday 10 January 2011 1:42

I'M HIGH SO I DNT GET THIS FML

FukYurLife_89 0

Monday 10 January 2011 1:45

ydi for sinning the night before... lmao

imac2014 0

Monday 10 January 2011 2:03

some parents ya got there...

CoolAsian 0

Monday 10 January 2011 2:09

Dang, religion is important but your parents are messed.

funhun123 0

Monday 10 January 2011 2:37

I think god would excuse you for being absent on that one...

katiebove 0

Monday 10 January 2011 3:12

rofl

savvy_suzy 0

Monday 10 January 2011 3:40

I find religion and religious people abhorrent. This is one such example of the attitude that disgusts me so. Stick your 'saviour' up your arse. Maybe the anal plug would stop the runs. Compassion and understanding obviously are not part of this equation.

Person1233 12

Monday 10 January 2011 3:59

My intolerance meter just beeped.

boopityboppity 11

Monday 10 January 2011 4:08

Mine didn't bother; it just broke. If there's one thing I cannot stand, it's a person who stands with the conviction that others are inferior because of personal beliefs.

randomlyfunny94 0

Monday 10 January 2011 4:28

#26 your an jerk for disrespecting God and stereotyping religious people, whether or not you believe in God is up to you but insulting any religious group is NEVER okay