Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up thinking my house was on fire because I could...

By Anonymous - 26/12/2012 02:46 - Canada - Saint Albert

Today, I woke up thinking my house was on fire because I could hear crackling flames downstairs. I panicked and tripped out of bed. It was the fireplace channel I left on last night so I could wake up to a Christmas ambiance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 663

You deserved it 35 696

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Same thing different taste

By fire - 15/12/2009 00:00 - United States

Today, I had to call 911. Why? My fireplace caught on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 532

You deserved it 6 607

By Anonymous - 05/12/2018 13:30

Today, I woke up to the fire department at my house. Why? My brother called 911 thinking there was a fire after turning the heat on for the first time all winter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 430

You deserved it 142

By Mel - 07/05/2011 22:27 - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 966

You deserved it 12 961

Ventilation

By Anonymous - 29/06/2023 18:00 - United States - Victorville

Today, I woke up at 4 a.m. to the smell of something burning. My husband and I checked the house, and I was convinced there was possibly an electric fire. Went back to bed, then when I woke again I remembered I'd straightened my hair the day before and that’s what the burnt smell was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 720

Oh nose!

By Fried. - 14/05/2019 16:00

Today, I woke up to the smell of cooking bacon. As I walked down my stairs towards my kitchen, I realised that the smell wasn't coming from bacon, but from my kitchen being on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 975

You deserved it 134

Stealth mode

By Slipperywhenwet - 28/02/2009 13:08 - United States

Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend myself and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house, but I'd left the radio on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 629

You deserved it 48 167

By chinesef000d - 29/08/2009 05:38 - United States

Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 958

You deserved it 3 199

Our house, was a very very very nice house

By Anonymous - 06/03/2020 18:00

Today, my house caught on fire. After it was put out, I realized the damage wasn't bad, mainly smoke damage. I went to my parents' for the night because my house smelled. While there, I received a phone call from my neighbor. Apparently, my house caught fire again. It's now a pile of ashes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 279

You deserved it 241

By Muffinhater - 24/12/2009 03:21 - United States

Today, I awoke at 5am to the smell of smoke and the sound of sirens. It seems the whole Santa Monica Fire Department had made it outside our apartment complex. We had to wake up every single person on our floor. What for? An old lady burned a muffin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 347

You deserved it 2 434

By justme - 09/02/2010 18:20 - France

Today, I was about to take a crap when the smoke alarm went off. I ran out of the bathroom and tried to run downstairs. I tripped and shit on myself. The alarm had gone off cause my kid put my wallet in the toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 641

You deserved it 5 173

PantyGAMES 10

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:11

Waking up to ambiance? Seems more like you were shooting for ambulance.

shayshayshazam 14

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:10

That's so dumb it's almost impressive. Merry Christmas though!

Comments

destroyu 8

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:27

Terrible

oj101 33

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:31

At least you got to open your presents early. Merry Christmas to you all!

chucktaylor5 2

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:32

it wouldve been better if u wouldve stomped on ur tv to try to put out the fire

howdeedoo 22

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:37

No, that would have been stupid

robo_thunder 13

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:50

Stupidity is partly what makes this site so great though isn't it?

80skid 15

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:36

Definition of irony.

LaidToRest48 9

Wednesday 26 December 2012 9:37

80skid 15

Wednesday 26 December 2012 20:29

Actually, it is. When you do something to bring peace to yourself ahead of time&it ends up causing you harm, that's ironic.

nycwrestler 17

Thursday 27 December 2012 22:03

Still, no

buckdharma 36

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:42

This is a very pleasant experience but to be on the safe side make sure you watch the CSL Creosote Sweeping Log commercial.

CharresBarkrey 15

Wednesday 26 December 2012 8:46

I'm liking your comments more and more. Our type of humor is a dying one, I'm afraid.

FameNFortune 12

Wednesday 26 December 2012 9:22

Seems legit .

bootyful86 7

Wednesday 26 December 2012 9:25

There's a fireplace channel?

CherryOnTop222 7

Wednesday 26 December 2012 9:48

THERE IS A FIREPLACE CHANNEL!?!!?

chocolateisyum 12

Wednesday 26 December 2012 10:30

Wow, that wasn't exactly a smart idea.

howdeedoo 22

Wednesday 26 December 2012 18:59

Sure it was. OP just forgot and freaked out. That doesn't make it a bad idea

HeyArnold91 8

Wednesday 26 December 2012 11:22

Fireplace = Christmas ambiance? Silly me I thought it was a Christmas tree and decorations.

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Ahoy ship's boys and girls ! Today we're heading to France. Be ready to face rain, storm and beer because Lille is welcoming us, and believe me, it's not Los Angeles. Do you all have your raincoats? -Bonjour ! First of all, present yourself ma jol...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 8

Today, I left my wife of 25 years. For every one of those years, I was treated like a stupid child or a worthless burden. When I finally got fed up, everyone said I was the bad guy. I just want to be treated like a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 142

The Top

Today, I was shaving my left armpit when I cut myself badly. I wondered whether or not it would be safe to shave my right armpit, then reasoned that it couldn’t possibly happen twice. It did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 190

You deserved it 27 963

Today, an old guy got nose to nose with me, threatened me, and spit in my face, just because I politely reminded him he needed to be wearing a mask. He had been coughing on multiple food items in my store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 948

You deserved it 154

Today, I treated my boyfriend to an expensive dinner using the last of my paycheck. I had to excuse myself to the bathroom a few minutes in. I came back to find my plate empty. His excuse was, "I didn't want the food to get cold." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 979

You deserved it 4 377

Today, the package I've waited for months for finally arrived. It turned out it wasn't for me, but for my sister, who bought the same thing only 2 weeks ago. When I called, the company told me they received my payment, but that there were no more of the item in stock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 062

You deserved it 2 867

Today, I went to pick up my paycheck at the convenience store I work at. While there, two frat boys came in and bought seventeen 30 packs of beer. That comes to about $300. They spent more at the store in one day than I get paid in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 765

You deserved it 4 478

Today, my girl and I with got caught having sex in the car by cops. They thought we were smoking bongs because the windows were foggy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 835