Love: Today, I woke up to "we're leaving". I'm now homeless because... - FML

By hobo - 17/05/2015 17:47 - Canada - Chilliwack

Today, I woke up to "we're leaving". I'm now homeless because my Dad and his girlfriend got into an argument over toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 576

You deserved it 2 205

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Same thing different taste

By Username - 01/05/2011 03:16 - United States

Today, the lease on my house ended and I finished moving in with my girlfriend. After everything was moved in, she broke up with me. Hello homelessness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 677

You deserved it 4 160

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

By Anonymous - 17/07/2022 01:00 - United Kingdom

Today, after my housemate handed in his notice to vacate without telling me beforehand, I had few days whilst working to make a decision to stay or vacate. In a panic, I chose vacate. On my day off I sat down with my finances and discovered I can't afford elsewhere. I asked to stay, my landlord put up rent by 50%. I might now become homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 979

You deserved it 251

By Anonymous - 01/09/2009 07:30 - United States

Today, I'm being evicted from my apartment for not paying rent. My father is the on-site landlord, meaning I now have to move my stuff downstairs into his place, and hear every day how I'm a failure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 128

You deserved it 45 619

Joe Bidet

By tmrwsmggls - 16/11/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 348

Come back

By Anonymous - 01/11/2021 01:59

Today, after I got into an argument with mom's boyfriend, telling him to piss off because no one wanted him, and he did so, saying he was done putting in wasted effort, now he's gone I realise how much he did for us, or that his share of the bills paid the rent. We may lose our house because of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 207

You deserved it 2 692

Communication breakdown

By Austin - 12/02/2011 07:50 - United States

Today, I got a notice in the mail saying I had been fired from my job. My dad's the boss, who I happen to live with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 917

You deserved it 3 796

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 244

You deserved it 3 808

By WhyTheEff - 20/11/2009 23:50 - United States

Today, I woke up to find my house TP'd. I also noticed our entire house was devoid of toilet paper. Someone had broken in just to steal our toilet paper and TP our own house with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 544

You deserved it 3 102

By airhead2015 - 12/02/2014 17:57 - United States - Morristown

Today, I ran out of toilet paper. I yelled from the bathroom for my parents to bring me some toilet paper. My dad slipped one tiny piece of toilet paper under the door and boomed, "THE FINAL TEST." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 416

You deserved it 5 686

Get out

By Anonymous - 10/08/2014 17:24 - Germany - Würzburg

Today, my mother kicked me out of the house because her new boyfriend needs my room. Evidently he also needs my credit card, passport, and wallet too, because she kept all three, while tossing everything else out on the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 234

You deserved it 3 245

Next

Top comments

steveykinz0967 16

Monday 18 May 2015 16:19

Wow their relationship is really in the toilet.

Allornone 35

Monday 18 May 2015 16:20

you roll the paper over, not under, dammit.

Comments

justinccp 8

Tuesday 19 May 2015 0:01

It's so funny how the smallest, most insignificant things can cause huge arguments that open the flood for how people really think.

Steephx0 23

Tuesday 19 May 2015 2:15

How does toilet paper start an argument? Did he buy single ply?

clarkson37 15

Tuesday 19 May 2015 2:34

Homeless yet you can post on FML

elsie23 11

Tuesday 19 May 2015 4:04

How does this make you homeless ? Or both you and your dad can not rent an apartment , then **** your life op.

earthlyscum 19

Tuesday 19 May 2015 4:15

Everybody knows the roll goes up not down. If you face it down then you need to reevaluate your life

phreaker913 21

Tuesday 19 May 2015 4:37

THE ANSWER IS OVER!!! everything else is just wrong

EbyKat 16

Tuesday 19 May 2015 13:11

If you have a good relationship with his (now) ex I would talk to her about you continuing to live there until your dad gets his shit together or at least until the end of the school year. Uprooting your kid like that is shitty. If I were her I'd be happy to have you stay.

Wolfipoo 31

Tuesday 19 May 2015 20:34

Sorry for the life problems OP

potatopolice1025 18

Thursday 21 May 2015 7:56

She probably uses that cheap one-ply shit. Good on your dad for refusing to accept sub-standard quality of TP.

bebared 12

Thursday 21 May 2015 8:19

Weather to put it Over or under?

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I asked my son to keep my new girlfriend secret from his mom until our divorce was final, and he ran straight to her. She told the judge I was unfaithful and wants more money from our settlement. My son doesn't give a shit about snitching on me, because she's giving him a percentage of the new settlement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 1 847

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 812

You deserved it 9 769

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "What do I do now?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 143 574

You deserved it 16 446

Today, my mother-in-law moved into my wife's two-bedroom apartment. She's quite possibly the reincarnation of Hitler himself, and she'll be staying until this time next year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 627

You deserved it 2 499

Today, at our kid's extracurricular, my ex, with whom I have been fighting for our child for ten years, casually admitted that his preferred murder weapon is an axe. This is surprisingly in character. FML

I agree, your life sucks 761

You deserved it 158

Today, I went to the university pool. There was this cute lifeguard there, and every time I got out of the water I saw her looking at me, so I walked up to her and asked if everything was OK. She told me she thought I was going to drown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 350

You deserved it 512

Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 825

You deserved it 14 477

Today, I was eating cereal while absentmindedly reading the box. I was amused when I found it expires on my birthday. Then I realized it expired on my birthday two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 102

You deserved it 28 368