Love: Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband and I, for a laugh,...

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 22:29 - United Kingdom - Gloucester

Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband and I, for a laugh, did our first dance to LMFAO's "I'm sexy and I know it" with stupid moves and everything. 200 guests. Nobody laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 151

You deserved it 30 368

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Same thing different taste

By O0hdear - 27/08/2015 17:44 - United States - Humble

Today, I went to my fiance's cousin's wedding with him. I got drunk and danced like a stripper in front of his entire extended family, who I'd just met that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 544

You deserved it 32 614

By fml - 10/08/2013 10:48 - United States - Perry

Today, my new husband and I were called up to have our first dance at our wedding. While I rested my head on his shoulder, he whispered the most romantic thing to me: "Your breath stinks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 639

You deserved it 12 266

By derranged - 22/04/2009 18:24 - China

Today, I was the best man at a wedding and I was flirting with a cute bridesmaid. Then this old guy decides to give the newlyweds a toast. He made a crappy joke and barely anybody laughed. So I say to the girl, "Wow that sucked, who the hell does he think he is?" The girl replies, "That's my dad". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 219

You deserved it 73 487

By jacey chreyest - 14/02/2014 21:57 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I married the love of my life. I was ecstatic until the wedding reception, where my new husband got drunk and started crying about how he'd been "forced" into marrying me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 799

You deserved it 5 013

Classic Jeff

By Anonymous - 02/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Peru

Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband decided it would be a good idea, when he was supposed to do his speech, to stand up and say, "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please. Genitals. That is all." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 963

You deserved it 1 559

By thefailure - 02/08/2009 04:21 - United States

Today, it was my wedding day, and while I was standing next to my husband in front of all of our guests, I was rocking on my heels because I was nervous. I rocked too far and fell backward. My husband didn't come to help me up. He just said at the top of his lungs, "FAIL!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 163

You deserved it 16 711

By DutchOven - 04/07/2009 21:07 - United States

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 397

You deserved it 25 955

Rush

By Embarassedd - 26/11/2009 05:01 - Canada

Today, my husband and I were at a wedding. When the DJ announced that the bar was open, my hubby was the only one to RUN to the bar while the other husbands stayed behind to dance with their wives, eyeing us in a weird way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 814

You deserved it 4 458

By gottalovefriends - 23/04/2012 04:04 - United States - Atkinson

Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 960

You deserved it 4 911

I'm happy for you, but…

By Love stinks - 19/08/2013 13:06 - United States

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 594

You deserved it 4 763

CrissyyyS2 22

Thursday 25 April 2013 9:28

What a tough crowd.

bluerhhajfk 17

Thursday 25 April 2013 9:28

lmfao

Comments

a9fc 2

Saturday 27 April 2013 10:21

But the both of you enjoyed it yea? That's what matters

amifaiyaz 12

Sunday 28 April 2013 5:27

At least you and your husband are together in your horrifically embarrassing sense of humor.

Cld19_2013 1

Tuesday 30 April 2013 20:57

It's your wedding day and you're posting on FML? That FYL goes without saying.

sulitak 27

Thursday 16 May 2013 9:46

you do know that in order to submit one of these it HAS to start with "today" right? If you don't want to click on the "Submit your FML" above for proof, the number one 'rule' is "Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself."

Surfboy1017 9

Friday 7 June 2013 22:12

Did the same for my cousins wedding, it was the best

esb77 8

Sunday 28 July 2013 2:03

Do they not have a sense of humor?

blondie2476 9

Saturday 10 August 2013 15:14

Time for new friends?

Mailman2121 15

Sunday 13 October 2013 22:14

I don't get those comments blaming the guests for not laughing. If nobody laughed, it's because OP and her husband obviously have a shitty sense of humor, and they deluded themselves into thinking they were funny. But it's okay, who hasn't done an unfunny joke at least one time?