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Marriage of the year, that.
That sucks he's too ignorant to see how she's feeling. I suggest you spill your heart out and let him know that she's not who he thinks she is. What else have you got to lose? I don't imagine you'll spend much time with either of them once/if they're married.
Um, did you ever think that Op is blinded by her own personal pain and that would make her think any jokey comment would be a sign they are "not meant to be together." I have loved guys and had moments where I said, "I would be so much better for him." The truth is we do not know anything about the situation in which the Op finds herself in. Her friendship could be a crass one, where they make jokes like that. Her friend could have said, "I love him so much and I want to do this, but heck if it doesn't work out there is always divorce...but I don't see that happening" and Op just shared the bad part to make her seem like the victim. I think anyone who could not make a move after three years to secure their own happiness is probably not a good judge of character and life strategies.
Selfish.
Life is never fair...suck it up, do something you love, and move on.:)
Whatever happened to the complex divorce system from old times? *cough*shotgun*cough*. Perhaps OP can be the attorney, and perform the act.
America.
Omg this is definitely your fault, you should have told him ages ago how you felt. If you couldn't tell him because you felt 'scared' or 'shy' then you should have had the decency to tell your friend how you felt in the BEGINNING of their relationship, and if she was a good friend she would have ended things (seeing as she could care less). You need to move on and get over him, and wish and hope for the best for them because its too late for you to do anything about it.
Why would the friend have to end it? The guy has a right to be with whomever he wants and if he likes the friend, then that is his choice. I hate this idea that if you tell your friend that you "love someone" they have to leave that person. Obviously if the guy had felt Op was a great gal he would have asked her out himself. Op has no right to dictate how two people spend their lives.
Finally someone is talking sense.
I'm sorry that this is happening to you, but I think it's time for you to move on and leave the thoughts of you and this man behind. It's been eight years. And now he's planning to spend the rest of his life with your best friend. I think it's safe to say that you missed your chance, five years ago.
Keywords
8 years?? Perhaps it's time for you to move on?? And for those saying for OP to tell him, I think she's missed her window. He wouldn't have proposed if he didn't love her best friend, and no decent friend or human would ruin their best friend's relationship or wedding.
Ouch. That's a doomed marriage for sure, and that sucks for everyone involved. But if dreamboy can't see that she's that shallow and stupid after 5 years, then you should probably stop dreaming about him and find someone better.