Work: Today, my boss recognized my shoes under the stall wall and had... - FML

By Username - 21/03/2012 17:10 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my boss recognized my shoes under the stall wall and had a conversation with me while we were both taking a dump. I had severe diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 412

You deserved it 2 343

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Same thing different taste

By DonPedro - 16/01/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 862

You deserved it 11 396

Not now, mate

By yuen - 16/06/2009 14:59 - Australia

Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 612

You deserved it 4 741

By teaspoonzz - 25/10/2017 15:00

Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 632

You deserved it 286

Jobsworth

By sucksssssss - 28/01/2010 20:12 - France

Today, while at work, my boss asked me to clean the bathroom. Someone had pooped on the floor and I stepped in it, dropping my manager's keys into the toilet. I then had to clean up my shoe and the floor, and put my hand in the toilet to get the keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 184

You deserved it 3 992

Squeezed one out

By harris - 25/06/2021 02:00

Today, I was desperate for the toilet when I got stopped by our CEO for a chat about a project I made a ton of profit on. I was so close to disaster that when she pulled me in for a hug I wasn’t expecting, it happened. Diarrhoea down my legs and shoes. I practically made the CEO vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 333

You deserved it 229

By Anonymous - 02/08/2013 21:34 - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 022

You deserved it 5 405

Squits

By fishtities - 07/04/2016 04:56 - United States - Dallas

Today, as a reward for starting to eating healthy, I got the squits at work. After going to the restroom, my stall didn't have toilet paper, the other two stalls didn't have any either. My boss definitely noticed too when he walked in on me with my pants around my ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 709

You deserved it 1 745

TW: Gross

By mpfrost153 - 01/11/2021 12:00 - United States

Today, as if having diarrhea at work wasn’t bad enough, my office’s aggressively flushing toilet sprayed me with my own liquid shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 142

You deserved it 129

By NoPrivacy - 26/04/2012 10:44 - United States

Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 175

You deserved it 34 736

Industrial logs

By wow - 19/02/2009 21:44 - United States

Today, I took a massive dump at work and clogged the industrial toilet. Since I used the unisex one at the end of the hall, I watched my super hot coworker walk in after me. And then she ran out immediately. Everyone had seen me walk out before her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 535

You deserved it 36 948

Next

Top comments

Kayokku 1

Wednesday 21 March 2012 22:31

Good work on those reports today, Johnso-- HNNNGGGGGGGGGG

Cad6 24

Wednesday 21 March 2012 22:37

Run run as fast as you can, you can't catch me, I'm the liquidshit man!

Comments

fenixtorador1 11

Thursday 22 March 2012 5:20

75 actually seems pretty cute, not gonna lie

obiwankendrobi 2

Thursday 22 March 2012 7:12

Well that had to be awkward...

ZachTheMan 0

Thursday 22 March 2012 7:44

LOL

Hts777 4

Thursday 22 March 2012 9:28

At least you didn't have to shit alone!

OfficeNinja 5

Thursday 22 March 2012 13:49

You need to find a safe harbor. A bathroom somewhere that NOBODY, or very few people, use. Every building has a safe harbor, you just have to find it. Don't expect help finding it - a pirate never tells you where his treasure is. Make that your work assignment for the day. PS - I work at a major international airport that saw more than 38 million people last year. I know of 4 safe harbors, two of which are in public areas, one is behind an "authorized people only" sign, and one behind a locked door.

Melinie 7

Thursday 22 March 2012 13:50

You totally could have had a fart competition like on Family Guy!

venomousddog 19

Sunday 25 March 2012 1:50

OH MY..... I would so be the referee

BobbieH 19

Thursday 22 March 2012 21:36

FYL! I've never understood where the courtesy went and how having a conversation in the bathroom is acceptable behavior.

bleedwell 7

Thursday 22 March 2012 23:30

Oh, what a lovely conversation that must have been.

PhishloverA 14

Saturday 28 July 2012 9:07

Sometimes it's good to have someone talk to you while crapping. It takes your mind off of it

JustHayden 5

Thursday 27 September 2012 17:59

Been there and done that.

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The Top

Today, I was enjoying the benefits of marriage with my new husband. We were changing positions when my joints started crackling and popping like my mother's did when I was a kid. My husband stopped, concerned about my possible pain... I'm 20 years-old and pop like an arthritic 50 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 615

You deserved it 3 896

Today, I asked my boyfriend to spend the night at my house because my dad would be working out of town, and once the rest of the house left I thought it'd be sweet if he snuck in my room and slept with me. His reply was, "Why bother? You're on your period, it's not like we can do anything." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 270

You deserved it 14 171

The Top

Today, my son, who to my great shame is a typical bully, was suspended for bullying a disabled girl. Her father must have been the biggest, meanest, most tattooed ex-marine I've ever seen. He blamed me for bad parenting, and I actually peed myself a little in fear, which he saw too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 1 629

Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 683

You deserved it 47 021

Today, a co-worker, who lives 30 minutes out of my way, had broken down so I picked him up. We were both 5 minutes late and both got fired. Our department takes 30-60 minutes to even start running. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 378

You deserved it 191

Today, I woke up on my boyfriend's bedroom floor. When I asked him why I was there, he said I'd gotten too hot, so he rolled me off his bed. I have the flu and a fever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 628

You deserved it 3 785

Today, while walking home with my mom, some unoriginal cockshart in a passing car yelled at me: "Fuck her in the pussy!" It was a long, awkward walk home after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 104

You deserved it 2 976

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to talk dirty to my boyfriend, after he promised not to laugh at me. All seemed well, until I heard laughter. It wasn't him, though; it was his family listening from the other room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 107

You deserved it 7 486