Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex when he stopped...

By Jamie - 10/03/2010 20:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex when he stopped responding. Five minutes later and ready to hang up, he apologized because he got distracted with his game of Tetris. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 902

You deserved it 3 997

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Same thing different taste

By Eskyew - 23/07/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking on the phone, and things got a little heated. We were in the middle of some kinky dialog, complete with hand action when he suddenly goes silent. While waiting for a response, I heard typing on the other end. He was checking his email. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 760

You deserved it 9 011

By Noname - 27/01/2009 11:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 345

You deserved it 28 333

Quickie

By Anonymous - 11/02/2024 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, when my boyfriend came over he was on his phone. We spent about 15 minutes together before having sex, then he made a phone call and said he had to leave. I could hear him from my window apologising to his coworker because he “just had to do something real quick but was now free to talk again.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 150

Are you listening?

By littlemissignored - 02/09/2009 19:17 - United States

Today, I was having lunch with my boyfriend and talking about how stressed out I've been because of my job. While I'm speaking, he pulls out his phone and says his boss is texting him and it was important. There was a game of Tetris reflecting onto his glasses from his phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 824

You deserved it 7 137

So hott

By facepalm - 27/02/2009 08:39 - Singapore

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 754

You deserved it 15 167

Phoney sex

By Anonymous - 09/03/2020 08:00

Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 250

You deserved it 612

By Anonymous - 14/04/2014 03:17 - United States

Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 974

You deserved it 7 874

By Anonymous - 19/02/2011 05:22 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 039

You deserved it 8 604

By 504-A1 - 11/05/2012 22:02 - Canada - Barrie

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 504

You deserved it 10 410

Hot and heavy

By Lickmylovepump - 19/01/2012 04:09 - United States

Today, my boyfriend insisted that we try phone sex. He started telling me all the things he wanted to do to me while breathing heavily. Unfortunately, it sounded so ridiculous, I burst out laughing. He hung up on me, and has refused to pick up since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 435

You deserved it 35 580

ydi_ruuc 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 1:05

It's more interesting.Really.

muffinsareyummy 1

Thursday 11 March 2010 1:06

Phone sex is overrated. It's not pleasurable at all.

Comments

gregsdaman 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 5:21

did snickerdoodle just spell sorry wrong?

Erindub 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 5:25

If hes 12 I can understand. Is he 12?

devin0124 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 5:53

you need to work on your phone sex....if you want I can help you

thatfeelsright 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 6:14

try oral it's betta than phone

Night22_fml 4

Thursday 11 March 2010 6:14

anybody else thinking of collegehumor's tetris god?

bobbobpope 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 7:36

yes!!!

MrNiglet3000 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 6:54

ydi for having phone sex...who has phone sex just get the **** out there and do it! ofcoarse hes gonna play tetris cause phone sex isnt the real deal

buttonface 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 7:05

Either too ugly to get laid the proper way, or too young to **** and go out on a school night. Either way, ydi for being hideous/a teenager.

KurouTenshi 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 7:08

she's spelling it "sowwy" as in the cute way of "sorry" STFU :/

mnky 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 7:10

me and my boyfriend have phone sex but we live over 1000 miles away. and that's a good form of pleasure

Stiffilz 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 7:36

time for a new boyfriend. or phone sex lessons!!

Keywords

Love Cute Surprise My ex Texting Awkward Wanker Sex Intimacy Insomnia Health Sleep Mental health Cooking Food Kids Parents Weekend Miscellaneous Pranks Annoying Embarrassing Work Technology Coworkers Zoom Roommate Argument Animals Cats

The Top

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the mall. We were looking at jewellery in Zales and she came across the engagement rings. She looks at one and says, "Are you kidding me? That ring is hideous and it's the most expensive one here! Who the fuck would buy that?" Well, that would be me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 292

You deserved it 6 694

Today, after I spent a weekend at my boyfriend’s house, I came home to find the locks changed. My parents decided to change them because they “don’t need me slutting around under their roof.” My boyfriend lives 4 hours away and I have nothing but an overnight bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 133

The Top

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I cancelled our date tonight. I cancelled because I had a seizure and was taken to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 015

You deserved it 3 667

Today, my 8 year old son cut his own hair. He did a better job than I ever did. I'm a hairdresser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 521

You deserved it 34 175

Today, I took my boys over to their grandmother’s house. We had a nice supper together. We all talked, played board games, and watched TV. After a while, I couldn’t find my 13 year-old son. He was in his 67 year-old grandmother’s master bathroom, jerking off with her dirty granny panties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 646

You deserved it 207

Today, while working as a manager at a restaurant, the "All employees must wash hands" sign in the bathroom was stolen. Now my employees won't wash their hands because they "don't have to." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 137

You deserved it 2 600

Today, after nine years, I got back together with my first love – the man who taught me about sensuality and touch, and who no one could measure up to since. I guess this time I’ll have to do the teaching, because he has somehow forgotten even the basics of how to touch a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 483

You deserved it 179

Today, my mom came home unusually early from work and walked in on me hooking up with a guy. What made it more embarrassing is the fact that I’m 19 and my hookup is 52. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 1 792