Love: Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to...

By wtfjusthappened - 24/01/2009 03:27 - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to come over. Still being in love with him, I agreed to see him but decided I wasn't drunk enough to handle the stress. After a while of drinking, he said that he really missed me and wanted to be with me. My reply consisted of throwing up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 700

You deserved it 31 837

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Out from Hell - 22/04/2013 22:31 - United States - Woodstock

Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 644

You deserved it 76 566

The Phone Call

By turnmyphoneoff - 24/09/2019 00:01

Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 954

You deserved it 215

By Amy (grossed out) - 27/04/2014 13:43 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, my long-distance boyfriend got extremely drunk and insisted that we left the Skype call on all night so it was like I was there with him. I woke up to the sound of him vomiting loudly at 3am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 723

You deserved it 6 073

I need one

By j…… - 14/08/2011 03:56 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because of my drunken antics. My reaction? Pour myself a stiff drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 617

You deserved it 56 931

I was the bullet in the relationship

By Anonymous - 10/01/2023 10:00

Today, for the first time in two years, I met my ex-girlfriend. I was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 362

By dukemisery - 28/11/2016 12:23 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, my ex-girlfriend called saying she wants to get back together because of how mature and sincere I sounded last night. I despise her and I was drunk last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 034

You deserved it 3 023

By TheOtherWoman - 20/07/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 032

You deserved it 12 794

Strategic

By Anonymous - 07/06/2009 13:50 - South Africa

Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 764

You deserved it 95 433

By Anonymous - 12/03/2013 22:21 - United States - Berkeley

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I said yes. This caused him to panic, excuse himself, then take it back via text message a half hour later, claiming he'd been drunk. We live together. When he comes back home, it's going to be very awkward indeed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 573

You deserved it 3 107

The ex from hell

By welpwelpwelp - 08/07/2015 17:45 - Australia - Canberra

Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 990

You deserved it 1 958

mellowyellowww 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:33

drinking never solves anything.

cineturtle 0

Friday 22 May 2009 17:52

uhm if you needed to DRINK in order to see him, then clearly it wasn't a very healthy relationship.

Comments

King_of_Kings 3

Saturday 28 February 2009 16:33

you in my opinion need to see a real doctor. Jack Daniels isn't a real doctor.

derpip 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 15:27

Well if he broke up with you, then maybe throwing up on him isn't a bad thing... Nevertheless, I agree with 2 and 3. GO GET HELP!

diet_cocaine 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 21:25

did he still take u back????

HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Thursday 14 November 2013 18:17

Obviously he did. Nothing like throwing up on someone to repair the love that once was.

mellowyellowww 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 21:33

drinking never solves anything.

24788 6

Thursday 30 April 2009 8:41

Well did you guys get back together? I'm guess that was a no since you threw up and wrote an FML.

naroushh 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 0:49

THIS IS NOT AN FML ATLEAST HE LIKES YOU :|)

QueenOfMelodrama 0

Saturday 9 May 2009 23:45

This is why you don't use drinking as a crutch. Sorry, though...

cineturtle 0

Friday 22 May 2009 17:52

uhm if you needed to DRINK in order to see him, then clearly it wasn't a very healthy relationship.

MetalCraze 11

Monday 1 June 2009 15:01

well exs are exs for a reason so this is probably the best way it could have gone please move on

FYLFTW 0

Sunday 27 December 2009 2:47

Your Ex was trying to booty call you. When he said he really missed you he meant his junk missed being inside your junk. I would say booze helped you get out of a situation where you were likely to be taken advantage of.