Miscellaneous: Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while...

By Anonymous - 07/09/2011 23:02 - Canada

Today, my fiancé played Rockband drums from the bathroom while taking a crap. He actually managed to properly hit notes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 082

You deserved it 4 461

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/05/2014 22:11 - Sweden - Lidk?ping

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 388

You deserved it 13 707

By ButtWorthSingingBout - 01/01/2015 18:16 - United States - Phoenix

Today, my boyfriend finally played the new guitar I bought to replace the one he broke. He used a $1000 guitar to play me a moving song about my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 157

You deserved it 5 588

By Today - 07/09/2010 02:26 - United States

Today, I had to play Paper, Rock or Scissors and beat my boyfriend in order to get him to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 303

You deserved it 6 597

By MaHalKiTa - 23/07/2011 07:49 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend poops with "This is war" playing on his phone, and makes war sounds corresponding with his poop dropping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 706

You deserved it 4 684

By DepressedCellist - 27/09/2018 12:00

Today, my boyfriend and I had band practice for our duo. I've been playing cello for almost a year and wanted to incorporate it. He picked it up for pretty much the first time and sounded surprisingly good. I was excited until I realized he sounded better than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 538

You deserved it 526

By shittysongs - 07/03/2013 02:39 - United States - Bothell

Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 912

You deserved it 7 111

By unknown - 31/01/2010 06:54 - France

Today, my girlfriend and I were in my basement. I play drums and guitar very well. My girlfriend bet me $50 that she could play better than me. I made the bet, but what I didn't know was that she had been taking both drum and guitar lessons since she was 5. I just lost $50. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 578

You deserved it 46 257

Thanks, I guess…

By Anonymous - 02/11/2018 03:00

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk from town, busted the toilet door open crying, and proposed to me with a ring and all. I was literally mid-shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 280

You deserved it 306

By dog got ur phone - 07/05/2017 02:00

Today, I was playing music from my phone, which was on the couch. I guess my dog got jealous, because she picked it up and ran over to the toilet, promptly dropping it right in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 003

You deserved it 737

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 14:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 289

You deserved it 30 212

StoryOfTheYear 14

Thursday 8 September 2011 8:45

He knows his shit.

mrahhhhh 21

Thursday 8 September 2011 8:45

That guy is a champ!

Comments

latinjukes 2

Thursday 8 September 2011 8:58

How convenient

ihasbrains 10

Thursday 8 September 2011 9:59

Why the **** are you holding money in your picture? Don't you think that's a bit pretentious?

Xathanos 16

Thursday 8 September 2011 9:02

Skills, your fiancé has them.

Commander223 9

Thursday 8 September 2011 9:04

For some reason I imagined Johnny 3 Tears from Hollywood undead while reading this.

Mysanitywins 10

Thursday 8 September 2011 10:40

I was thinking more Funny Man.

amazingthingz16 0

Friday 9 September 2011 3:43

Hollywood Undead kicks ass

xcarxcrashx 9

Friday 9 September 2011 7:20

Funny Man most def.

amjmvs 0

Thursday 8 September 2011 9:16

Imagine what the man could do in the shower

wikdman300 3

Wednesday 14 March 2012 5:17

So true

mydadpulledout 17

Thursday 8 September 2011 9:38

I got a turkey on wii bowling doing the same thing

GlitteryMasakali 1

Thursday 8 September 2011 9:41

Fun guy

ihasbrains 10

Thursday 8 September 2011 9:54

I was going to say 'No shit, you have a tv in your bathroom?' and then I realized what the FML is about. Funny, lol.

Glockinator 2

Thursday 8 September 2011 10:03

That....... Is amazing

kaiyoshi 3

Thursday 8 September 2011 10:14

Now that's real talent!

stillcare77 5

Thursday 8 September 2011 10:16

he's the shit

Keywords

Awkward Friends Love Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable Cars You're fired Work Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Am I overreacting? Sex Intimacy Management Poopoo peepee Capitalism Coworkers Frustration Dogs Animals ADHD Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, I was working a concert ticket booth. A lady gave me her ticket, I punched it, and told her to enjoy the show. She asked for the “hotel.” Apparently, she thought that the concert ticket cost included a hotel stay, since she traveled from out of state. She cussed me out and had to be escorted out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 333

You deserved it 76

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 636

You deserved it 42 713

The Top

Today, I wrote a post about how I was thinking of attempting suicide. Not one single person contacted me to see if I was alright. FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 625

Today, I scored the winning goal for a tournament. Too bad it was for the opposition team. If only looks could kill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 584

You deserved it 826

Today, while jogging, I realized my face jiggles more than my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 468

You deserved it 7 941

Today, I tried to turn in a final exam online. When I went to check if it had been submitted Blackboard told me it did. My grade told a different story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 201

You deserved it 155

Today, I was sleeping when my roommate walked in and asked me: "So… when are you leaving?" She had decided to throw a party in our apartment. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 399

You deserved it 2 639

Today, my 7-year-old sister had a nightmare, so I let her sleep in my bed. I woke up to her punching me in the face and giving me a black eye. Apparently, she not only screams when she's having a nightmare, she also "gives the bad guy a taste of his own medicine." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 104

You deserved it 4 719

Same thing different taste

Thanks, I guess…

Top comments

Comments