Intimacy: Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by...

By verysadasian - 30/07/2009 14:21 - United States

Today, my friends and I decided to compare dick sizes one by one. I was last and I was the smallest. I was also the only Asian amongst my friends. They now call me "the stereotype". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 643

You deserved it 29 279

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Same thing different taste

Stereotypes

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 09:42 - United States

Today, my friends and I noticed that people, no matter what stereotype, pretty much all have the same type of friends: the mean one, the funny one, etc., and started naming off the people in our group who fit into those personalities. We got to the token fat one, everyone looked at me and stopped talking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 028

You deserved it 10 382

By spandex - 24/03/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I had to perform a skit in my class in which I have to wear tight spandex compression shorts. The class laughed pretty hard, and I felt like I had done a good job. Afterward, a girl I have a crush on said, "So the stereotype about Asian guys IS true." Through the fluorescent lights you could see my junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 452

You deserved it 11 922

By lilben - 10/06/2011 08:09 - United States

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 603

You deserved it 4 782

By NiHao - 28/09/2009 03:16 - Canada

Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 145

You deserved it 3 894

By oh my son - 23/12/2012 06:02 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 758

You deserved it 5 782

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 16:17 - Canada

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 661

You deserved it 11 279

By Noname - 11/03/2009 20:29 - United States

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 006

You deserved it 9 604

"shortcomings"

By Anonymous - 24/02/2018 01:30

Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 927

You deserved it 643

By me - 09/08/2011 03:43 - United States

Today, my friend and I gave our numbers to some guys at a bar. Twenty minutes after we had left, we got a call. We excitedly answered the phone, only to hear the guy ask, "So are you the fat one or the ugly one?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 421

You deserved it 7 359

That one friend

By meesa in big doo do dis time! - 13/06/2017 12:00

Today, I learned that all of my "friends" refer to me as the, "Jar Jar Binks" of our circle of friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 527

You deserved it 474

Butterbuns 1

Thursday 30 July 2009 23:12

....Wow. YDI, for being lame enough to BE comparing dick sizes with your friends. Do you not have anything better to do?

henri_fml 0

Thursday 30 July 2009 23:10

didn't you know the size of your own dick before you entered a measuring contest?

Comments

mamamc 3

Friday 29 January 2010 23:52

a bunch of guys comparing dick sizes - that in itself is wierd - be careful of the guy who suggested doing it!

xdeathangel771 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 13:14

this is why i dont use the school lockerrooms

stingray08 3

Tuesday 2 February 2010 17:39

wow that is te gayest thing I have ever heard

megalan 0

Wednesday 3 February 2010 0:55

how many of u fags were there?

airforce987 20

Tuesday 9 February 2010 21:15

you must be a ****

my_user_name 7

Friday 23 April 2010 22:23

This could have stopped after the first sentence and still been an FML. Why would you be comparing dick sizes?? And to number 237, seeing your friend naked while changing is not a big deal in the US either, for most guys. There is a big difference between catching a glimpse of a naked man and deliberately stripping with all of your friends to compare. Why would you want to know in the first place? Would it really make your life better to have the biggest dick in the group? It's just a terrible way to spend an afternoon.