Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and...

By bad in the sack - 05/07/2014 04:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 165

You deserved it 11 464

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Same thing different taste

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 973

You deserved it 19 174

Bored

By Taylor parsons - 29/10/2010 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 435

You deserved it 7 540

Mr Floppy

By rachiej8 - 10/06/2012 04:13 - United States - Fairlee

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said, "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 038

You deserved it 5 520

Honest

By fml1977 - 04/03/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 384

You deserved it 8 015

By Anonymous - 22/12/2013 08:45 - Canada - Richmond

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 527

You deserved it 16 761

Smooth talker

By ugh - 31/01/2012 00:25 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 968

You deserved it 5 604

By your mother - 13/10/2010 09:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I went out for ice cream. We somehow started talking about which of our relatives had died. Right when she was talking about how her grandfather had died, I started laughing. She had gotten ice cream all over her face. She broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 217

You deserved it 40 487

Miscommunication

By Anonymous - 25/10/2012 05:45 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 708

You deserved it 18 568

Snoozefest

By notsogood - 08/11/2013 20:02 - United States

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 542

You deserved it 19 407

Routine

By youaresodumb - 27/09/2010 04:19 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I finished too quickly and apologized. She said she was used to it by now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 449

You deserved it 34 356

rp713 4

Saturday 5 July 2014 16:41

If she was on top she was in control, why should it be your fault?

MelTheGreat 23

Saturday 5 July 2014 16:40

Or maybe she just has different priorities, or A.D.D... But you probably do suck in this case.

Comments

MoodiQ 8

Saturday 5 July 2014 22:21

its obvious you dont need a tele-SCOOP to see it

tman1985 9

Saturday 5 July 2014 22:30

Doesn't matter: got ice cream

NodakN8V 25

Saturday 5 July 2014 22:42

Sounds like it's "hmm the ceiling needs to be painted" comment next time she's on top

fivehuskies 6

Saturday 5 July 2014 23:48

If she was on you, it's kinda her job to make it good. What can you do laying down?

birds_fml 7

Sunday 6 July 2014 5:27

You can rub her clit. You've got both hands free, so put your thumb between her legs and rub it.

C0mmanderKeen 9

Sunday 6 July 2014 0:23

I love sex with my boyfriend but I'm easily distracted and sometimes I can start thinking of stuff or get bored but it's not his fault! maybe she just got distracted and had to have some ice cream! Or you just have to make sex more interesting. try something new! blow her mind! ;)

itooamscrewed 10

Sunday 6 July 2014 4:29

She probably is telling you you're bad. Or maybe she's sick of you getting off and then doing nothing to try and get her off. Put some more effort into her pleasure and she won't do that again