By Agathus - 10/11/2011 14:35 - United Arab Emirates

Today, my mother spent over $5,000 to fly in a Feng-Shui master, put him in a five-star hotel, and had him walk around our house with a compass, moving things to help improve the "energy flow." Now all I have in my room is an old mattress and lamp. He's coming back tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 409
You deserved it 3 310

Same thing different taste

Top comments

No offense but ur moms retarded lol that sucks goodluck with that

Tell your mom you'll double the "energy flow" that he's created for half the price. Then go buy a flat screen to go with your lamp and old mattress.

Comments

"My family has $5000 to spend frivolously FML". Really?....... Your fortunate to have a mattress and lamp and money to throw around so be great-full.

The FML might be about how they DON'T have five grand to throw around, and that OP's mom is a dumbass.

SorrowFull 8

You should get the feng-shit master arrested for pushing false religion.

Feng Shui isn't a religion and tbh you could say all religions are false.

perdix 29

Slip him $500 to tell your mom that the energy flow of your room required a big ol' hookah right in the middle of your room. For another $500, have him tell her you need a big, old hooker on that mattress. You ******* have more money than sense, so you might as well blow it having fun.

$5000? Damn, that seems like a rip off. I decorated my house by watching HDTV ideas for free. Who knows? Maybe he's worth it. Your house should be your refuge. (:

miZscrZee 0

Gotta find the Yin and Yang! Lol!!

It is surprising how much a mother can influence your life. "If it's not one thing, it's your mother." - Peter Kay

KiddNYC1O 20

That money is better off in my account.

Bekavera 4

Is your mom a weirdo? Feel bad for you....

TraceCase_ 19

Pretty sure the internet can teach you anything you want to know about feng-shui for free.

#48 The internet can teach you a lot of things you want to know...And some things you don't.

Just pull any white material over you and pretend you're a ghost, probably enough to scare the mother and phony.