Health: Today, my uncle gave me a lecture on how I eat too much "unhealthy"...

By Singapore - 06/06/2012 02:59 - United States - Shortsville

Today, my uncle gave me a lecture on how I eat too much "unhealthy" junk food, and that it can be very harmful for me. All the while smoking a cigarette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 379

You deserved it 3 585

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/09/2015 06:59 - United States - Wittenberg

Today, my older brother offered me a cigarette. I took it and barely took a drag before he socked me in the arm and lectured me for taking the offer. He's an alcoholic, and smokes daily. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 172

You deserved it 9 608

He's got the look

By Anonymous - 12/05/2022 15:00 - United States - Steele

Today, my uncle visited for the first time in three years. It would have been very wholesome, if not for the fact that I got to see for myself just how badly his health has deteriorated. He's morbidly obese, a heavy smoker, and his voice is terrifying. I almost thought he was a pedophile when I first saw him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 185

By =( - 15/02/2015 14:52 - Australia

Today, once again I tried to convince my dad to stop smoking. And once again, while I was speaking, he lit up a cigarette and smoked until my asthma flared up and I was wheezing so hard that I had to leave the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 783

You deserved it 4 160

By Anonymous - 13/02/2010 08:47 - United States

Today, my brother's home for his annual visit, lectures my parents once about their eating habits. They promptly throw away all of their junk food. I'm there every Sunday, and have been telling them to eat healthier for medical reasons. They never listen. He's in sales, and I'm in med school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 967

You deserved it 3 087

Crisis control

By Cuntlette - 11/04/2014 16:38 - Australia - Brighton

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 580

You deserved it 3 375

Dumbass idea

By Caeru - 21/06/2011 07:08 - United States

Today, my mother tried to tell me that nicotine is the only substance that ensures weight loss, and that nicotine has been passed down in our family for over 5 generations of heavy smoking relatives. Then she encouraged me to start smoking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 197

You deserved it 3 608

By tardspawn - 05/04/2015 15:38 - United Kingdom - Horsham

Today, my morbidly obese mother gave me an angry lecture at dinner, saying without any trace of irony that my vegetarian diet is "unhealthy and utterly unacceptable". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 599

You deserved it 4 010

She's not wrong

By Anonymous - 25/03/2022 06:00

Today, I reprimanded my daughter for eating too many chips, since it's not good for you. She responded with, "Know what else isn't good for you? Two cigarettes a day." I couldn't even come up with a retort. I can't believe I just got burned by a ten-year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249

You deserved it 2 155

Health and wellbeing

By fuck - 21/08/2015 18:22 - United States - Somerville

Today, I scolded my son at a buffet after he pointed at an obese woman in a motorized wheelchair and asked how anyone could let themselves get so unhealthy. As I lectured him on genetics and thyroid problems, she rolled past with a plate stacked with an obscene amount of fried food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 052

You deserved it 6 479

By hypercrite dad - 19/09/2014 18:34 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 146

You deserved it 15 543

Angitia 8

Wednesday 6 June 2012 8:40

Not surprising. Hypocrisy is 'in'.

WCARlover 34

Wednesday 6 June 2012 8:41

Do as I say, not as I do

Comments

Articfox420 5

Wednesday 6 June 2012 17:51

Do what you want, life's short

TheyCallMeDamien 17

Wednesday 6 June 2012 18:03

He's trying to save your life not his.

noisebox 1

Wednesday 6 June 2012 18:36

You could have told him all you are missing is a smoke after eating

noisebox 1

Wednesday 6 June 2012 18:52

On second I would have told him nowadays everything is laced with cancer causing additives and that there is no longer anything healthy to eat...

5HAD0W 4

Wednesday 6 June 2012 19:39

Too much junk food IS unhealthy no matter who tells you.

FranzFerdinand 18

Wednesday 6 June 2012 22:37

Do as I say, not as I do. *puff*

circulareasoning 2

Wednesday 6 June 2012 23:51

Smoking cigarettes is not nearly as bad for you as junk food. That's common knowledge.

KBear3109 29

Thursday 7 June 2012 8:45

Did you miss the memo about cancer?

NatalieMalik 0

Thursday 7 June 2012 1:55

Tht happens to me all the time

numbersystem 4

Thursday 7 June 2012 5:35

Uncle is correct. "ad hominem tu quoque" look it up.

Haybo1774 0

Thursday 7 June 2012 5:58

I think we may have the same uncle...

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Feeling goofy, I thought it’d be funny to try to reenact that horrible sex scene from the movie Showgirls. I threw my body back, but completely lost my balance and smashed my head on the headboard. I ended up with a bad concussion and a huge hospital bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 2 157

Today, I have an HR meeting to discuss my team's performance. This is the same HR that refuses to hire more people because my department is full. The same HR that complains when tasks are completed late due to the team being overworked, yet refuses to take any suggestions. How do you give feedback to people like this? FML

I agree, your life sucks 429

You deserved it 74

The Top

Today, I found out the reason my mom took over 9 months to get me a therapist and much needed help after I told her how I had been depressed and suicidal for over two months. It wasn't because it was hard to find one, but actually because she thought I was making it up to cushion the fact that I got a C in a class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 557

You deserved it 152

Today, my husband woke up, rolled over, and said, "Good morning, beautiful." He hasn't called me that in months, but as I was about to reply, I realized he was talking to his pet turtle, not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 620

You deserved it 3 509

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later came into the T-Mobile that I work at to return the Sidekick that I bought for her. I had to transfer her account to a new Iphone. She got the Iphone from her new boyfriend, who works across the street from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 933

You deserved it 4 832

Today, a woman yelled at me for holding a door open for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 826

You deserved it 3 267

Today, I popped a zit that had formed around an ingrown hair "down there". It popped with so much force, the pus hit me in the forehead. Still can't get the hair out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 240

You deserved it 271

Today, I realized that my fiancé only touches me when he wants to have sex. Any other contact is purely accidental. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 335

You deserved it 4 354