Work: Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely...

By zl5 - 04/07/2014 23:17 - New Zealand - Masterton

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 124

You deserved it 4 843

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 05/06/2015 18:05 - United States - Haslet

Today, during jury duty, the shitbag who's accused of capital murder in our trial took the stand. The prosecution made him look like a total idiot. He got more and more flustered and eventually screamed at us that he'll have us killed if we find him guilty. I believe him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 928

You deserved it 2 617

By Anonymous - 23/05/2013 01:57 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 366

You deserved it 4 762

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 21:15 - Sweden - Uppsala

Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook my client's emotional outbursts in the courtroom, promising that he'd be on his best behavior from now on. An hour later, he screamed "FUCK YOU!" at the judge for telling him to quiet down. I hate my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 531

You deserved it 4 239

By Anonymous - 17/03/2016 15:34 - United States - Pomona

Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 202

You deserved it 2 575

By mustanggt - 10/07/2012 15:39 - United States - La Porte

Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 852

You deserved it 31 224

By Dreamer - 03/07/2012 06:22 - United States - Castro Valley

Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 670

You deserved it 3 820

By harrington61 - 19/05/2013 21:27 - United States - Midland

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 305

You deserved it 3 920

By thegrandchawhee - 29/08/2015 17:13 - United States - Yakima

Today, I was scheduled to fill in at the customer service counter where I work. Today was also the day that I allegedly accused a customer of being a thief, sold her a fraudulent money order, and will be sued for defamation of character. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 046

You deserved it 1 813

Fake news

By Anonymous - 18/07/2014 20:04 - Cura?ao

Today, I read a book by a former client who did time for fraud. She swears she's innocent, and blames everyone for her "ordeal": the police, court, judge, and me, her own attorney. She conveniently forgot to mention her two full confessions, one of which was given before the judge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 337

You deserved it 3 459

By Joe - 25/02/2009 19:05 - United States

Today, I had the cops called on me because I accidentally texted "I'm going to kill you and use your head as hood ornament" to my ex-fiancé, instead of my best friend. I only texted that because he got a better grade on an exam than me. Now I have a court date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 019

You deserved it 45 709

kelsorg 21

Saturday 5 July 2014 6:11

well, if you're good at your job you can prove him wrong! fyl

cakefete2 30

Saturday 5 July 2014 6:11

Well, at least you're familiar with the case. You should be able to defend yourself easily.

Comments

allison12197 23

Saturday 5 July 2014 9:59

Lucky for you the word of an attorney usually outweighs that of the defendant.

janed0e92 9

Saturday 5 July 2014 12:27

funniest thing ever!.... sorry op lol

tilliedevine 5

Saturday 5 July 2014 12:40

I prefer samsung to iPhones

arunnaveen82 4

Saturday 5 July 2014 13:33

If at all you involved you f****n deserve it...

Thatguy334 7

Saturday 5 July 2014 13:46

You're a lawyer, get over it. You're the one who chose to defend this turd

pumboc 23

Saturday 5 July 2014 14:04

You evidently have no idea how the legal profession works.

Zomg_Okay 26

Saturday 5 July 2014 14:06

Not a lawyer but to the best of my knowledge, they don't get to choose. If they did, child molesters and the like would never get fair trials because nobody would defend them.

interesting33 36

Saturday 5 July 2014 14:12

it sounds like he has maybe got mental issues - that might affect his case?

ibrokethehubble 5

Saturday 5 July 2014 17:57

It would definitely affect his case if he is deemed incompetent. Incompetency to stand trial results in the client residing in a mental institution and being medicated until such time that he is deemed competent, at which point the case resumes.