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Comments
Well, i should have thought the solution to your public embarrassment was very easy. In your place i would have taken my little girl to their table, I would have explained just that and offered deep and sincere apologies, and told my child why I was doing that all the way. She would have understood, and she would have remembered. Most importantly, the other girl whose own feelings were so badly hurt would have had a chance to show forgiveness and feel good about it. It would have been the brave and kind gesture. Feeling sorry and embarrassed about a racist remark is just NOT good enough.
Do you let her watch YouTube, plenty of racist morons on there.
Sometimes kids just blurt out random stuff But this sounds oddly specific Scold her and correct her
at such a young age, dont scold them. just make sure to teach them that saying things like that Is impolite and hurts people's feelings. then teach them why, and build on that. being angry that a child said something bad, without knowing why is pointless. they could be mindlessly repeating what they heard, or made a weird connection and said it in a bad way. teach them better and they will HOPEFULLY be better people later in life...
Either one of you is fibbing or you need to have a serious talk with your babysitter.
i doubt its an adult teacher or daycare worker. it could be the other kids at school/daycare that are exposed to racist environments and bring it with them to school. Hope you disciplined and told her that was wrong.
Keywords
I hope you made a big show of correcting her and teaching her differently.
Does she go to Daycare? Who babysits her the most? Outside of you and your wife, who does your daughter get the most interaction with? If you ever figure it out, you definitely need to to cut them out of your lives, you don't need some racist teaching her how to become one as well.