By Rapunzel1974 - 01/09/2013 04:29 - United States - Gulfport

Today, while I was teaching my chickens to eat out of my hand, one of the hens bit my finger and I dropped the entire handful of treats. Result: bonanza for the bird. The rest decided they could get more treats by biting me rather than by behaving. I now have a flock of fingerbiters. FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 309
You deserved it 7 432

Rapunzel1974 tells us more.

I'm the OP. I'm the one with the Fabulous Fingerbiters. These chickens aren't food: they're overindulged pets. Each one has a name, so chicken stew isn't an option. I've named them after various vaudeville stars or actresses because they're a lot of feathery drama queens. Actually, biting the hand that feeds them is right in line with the entertainment-industry theme I chose when naming them. A chicken bite from a baby bird isn't really painful at all because their little beaks are so soft. Even an adult bird's peck isn't painful in the same way a dog or cat bite is painful. They can't break the skin, although if they get you in the face it can leave a scratch or welt. A parrot, by contrast, can take your finger off. Chickens just aren't strong enough. These are going to be lovely laying hens. They're just a bit cheeky. I think I can break them of the habit by switching for a while to grass instead of mealworms, by *not* dropping the goodies no matter what, and moving on to the second phase of training, where I train them to hop onto my lap and sit there to be fed and petted. When training a chicken, it's important to use food as a reward. They're not like dogs and they don't consider attention a reward. They don't even consider petting a reward until they're conditioned to do so, because it's not a normal behavior or sensation for them. But it's straight-up operant conditioning, right out of B.F. Skinner

Top comments

grimrepa2007 3

OP. I'm going to assume you like chickens.... alot

Let them have their treats OP. Fatten them up. And when they're least expecting it.... Chicken pie time.

Comments

perdix 29

That was un-eggs-pected! Maybe your hens will bite your fingers now, but wait until they learn how you get your revenge . . . eggs-cellent!

perdix 29

#25, oh, I am not above the pun. I'm not among the comedy snobs who eschew puns as the "lowest form of humor." To get a laugh, I'll reach down to the gutter :D

And so it begins... Who would have thought it would be the chicken?

perdix 29

You think you have the talent to teach skills to dumb birds? You sound pretty . . . *lower sunglasses* cocky.

If this is repeated next time you feed them, quietly remove one chiken during the night. The next day, scatter some feathers around and sit in front of them with a bucket of KFC with a wicked grin while they wonder where their friend has gone. Worth a shot.

Ok so wear gloves next time, and the next chicken to bite your finger gets a punch in the breast!

ctlnaaia71 8

I can't believe this FML got the votes to be published.